Do not make any facetious comments or attempt wry replies because Will here will mute you.

remember when arsenal fed tottenham bad lasagna before a game, it seems they've done the same here but with excellent cocaine

Think I’ll just watch the highlights

“… so in the meantime, Kinga has gone out into the garden with a wine bottle and, for reasons only she knows, has bobbed it up herself!”

Depraved Inbred Community Distances Itself From Prince Andrew

Formula 1? Drive to Survive? Knock yourself out. But don’t kid yourself that it isn’t a completely knackered sport. If you’re changing the rules at increasingly frequent rate, the arse has fallen out of it. #f1

It’s been a good ding-dong, this one.

And you’re sure Casemiro isn’t Latoya Jackson?

@jonawils.bsky.social saying what we all know. The spectacle is no longer such. #lufc

Chelsea and Man City in the FA Cup final. No other English clubs have systematically ignored, bent or broken the rules like both have done. In terms of trophies won, no other English clubs have been as successful over the past decade and a half either. The moral of the story - is that there is none.

As the dust settles, it merely reinforces that every individual involved with Chelsea FC is an odorous cunt #lufc

Our club is basically the same as in 1970. Chelsea isn't. The final will be between the two most cynical and dishonest clubs in English football. #lufc

We were properly old-manned there. A first half where intensity would have gone a long way, and then didn’t deal well enough with the more mediaeval elements second half. Friday now #lufc

Shooting ourselves in the foot, which is impressive given we can’t shoot #lufc

Bit of a road at Headingley in April then…

If you scroll this really quickly, it looks like Chris Mason

One of the many unfortunates not to be there today. Make yourselves heard folks, try to enjoy it and back them to the end. MOT #lufc

Hahahahahahahabab

You didn’t get these dopey shadows at the old Wembley

Wonderful. Just wonderful.

Kelly Cates speaking in tongues on the BBC

Oh to have even the hair coverage of Donnaruma

The Gallaghers and Mick Channon shown in the crowd before the 40th minute, meaning the producer has burned through two of their three spectator cliches with a whole half and possible extra time and penalties still to go. Wasteful.

Incorrect

Fulham on TV at 1230? Think I’ll do the garden instead, thanks.

This is an astonishing read which I’m devouring at an alarming rate. Chapeau to @praddenkeefe.bsky.social for illustrating what a grubby place the UK, with London at the wheel, has become.

The decision of Piers Morgan to let this play out and keep filming is a spectacular bit of comedy of embarrassment. An anxiety dream of comedy.

This is exquisite, @leedsista.com #lufc

Over on the Spurs forum, the blame for their predicament appears to be the fault of Sunderland 🤷‍♂️

I’m watching the Sunderland game while the other half is watching Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. The plastic harridans of the US West Coast are coming out with way more dignity than the mackems

This is objectively funny #SUNFOR

Intensity counts for a lot this time of the season, and Forest are showing more of it

FIFA will not stop until it’s approved every single bad idea to grind players into the ground

Skiffle group called Washboards of Canada.

Dust settled, I hope Liam Rosenior isn’t too damaged by that experience. He’s a good young coach who shouldn’t have been subject to the BlueCo bollocks. Hope he gets a role where he can coach players who want to be coached and drop all the nonsense he thought had to come with the Chelsea gig.

The other half has sent me a picture of a car she wants next. It is the same car she has now.

I will go to my grave not knowing why people listen to The Weeknd in such numbers

Just let Michail Antonio have a pre-owned Ford Ka and nothing more. For his own sake and the wider public’s safety.

I see Agbonlahor’s done a prediction again. I think he just needs an arm around him. Mr Tickle’s, most probably.

Me, trying on my drunken Vinted purchases

I think the fact that he smashed the shit out of it and put it in the corner was what made it difficult for Petrovic. Plus the other four players in front of him. So nurgh. #lufc

Is Sean Longstaff our reddest-ever player? He is incredibly red. Nice chap. #lufc

Struijk was immense again; he wouldn’t have deserved to be on the losing side. Once again Gnonto affecting things. Farke’s changes really did make a difference (including Longstaff not tracking Adams). Immense credit to them. It wasn’t vintage, but they dug in and went to the end #lufc

Can someone please check on Tyler Adams? #lufc

Just incredible #lufc

I’d like to think the seed of that goal was sewn many weeks ago on the training ground #lufc

Well that was coming. Not over yet mind #lufc

Bogle not quite at his best tonight thus far. A bit shit in fact, you might say #lufc

It’s like a crowd at a county championship match #lufc

Idea for a @thesquareball.net watchalong: Providing all goes well and there’s nothing to play for, invite the man Nick from Claret and Booze up for the last game. Even better if a draw sends Spurs down* *Appreciate this might not age well