Hugh Keogh
@hughkeogh.bsky.social
📤 373
📥 480
📝 1688
Honest squalor
For absolute clarification, Butt Floss = Cameron, Bottom Cyst = Farage
1 day ago
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Magnificent metaphor, well done NASA. It's one small piss for man etc
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4 days ago
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Photographed while filming No-Arm Holiday
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4 days ago
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Haiku For An Uber Eats Rider Indicating right For three miles, you then turned left Without signalling
4 days ago
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Me too, steak pie
4 days ago
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Jurassic Park but they have resurrected the entire Carry On cast using DNA off some cigarette ends found in a Pinewood ashtray. They escape & idk eat/try to shag everyone?
5 days ago
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5 days ago
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Doomwatch (the film) starting on a channel called Legend Xtra+1. Ian Bannen is ace as always in this.
6 days ago
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7 days ago
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Tiffany & Debbie Gibson unaware that in 23 years time they'd be panelling each other in Mega Python vs. Gatoroid
7 days ago
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"The office summer party will be on The Event Horizon" *contented screeching noises*
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7 days ago
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reposted by
Hugh Keogh
Patrick W. Reed
8 days ago
Kendo Nagasaki has pulled out of the LDN show he was due to wrestle his retirement match on next week in Dudley, over the promotion increasingly cosying up to the Reform party. Fair play, imagine being morally outflanked by Kendo Nagasaki.
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People fretting that the Iranian nonsense might start World War 3, unaware that it already started 5 years ago
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-e...
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Belgian farmer accidentally moves French border
The farmer moved a two-century-old border stone into French territory as it was blocking his tractor.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-56978344
8 days ago
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reposted by
Hugh Keogh
Ray Newman
8 days ago
“Lee plays the scene almost completely internally. There is a fleeting look across his face which the camera catches. It isn’t triumph exactly. It’s more complicated than that. Doubt perhaps, or reverence. Or maybe just the expression of a man who has just set something irreversible in motion...”
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Why The Wicker Man was Christopher Lee’s Greatest Role
By guest contributor Adam Page There is a very particular type of genius which gets buried alive by success, and Christopher Lee probably knew this better than most. For decades, if we thought of C…
https://warped-perspective.com/2026/03/why-the-wicker-man-was-christopher-lees-greatest-role/
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Six months later...
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11 days ago
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The tortoise escaped while having his bath today leading to this exact exchange
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11 days ago
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While wearing a rucksack, sitting down sideways on a train/bus aisle seat, thus flattening their neighbour against the window.
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11 days ago
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15 days ago
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Duty Free: Dubai (2026). After their hotel is hit by a drone, Amy, David, Linda & Robert are questioned by the secret police who cannot fathom their 7 month holiday
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15 days ago
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It is my birthday, so I am having a big plate breakfast, no pissing about. Big plate.
15 days ago
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Chelsea Dagger. I would cheerfully wire myself to a generator if they'd switch it off.
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16 days ago
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Oh that's just fucking great the Metaverse is closing down?! It's my birthday tomorrow & all I wanted was a Metaverse hat or whatever it is. Now I'll never get to do metaverse things. Cheers
16 days ago
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17 days ago
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Hugh Keogh
Tits McGee
18 days ago
The job market is tough for young people atm, but the London Wildlife Trust has PAID traineeships available for those looking to get into nature recovery and conservation Deadline is this Sunday 22nd March, so be quick
careers.wildlondon.org.uk/job/c00274af...
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Keeping it Wild Trainees - Job page - London Wildlife Trust
https://careers.wildlondon.org.uk/job/c00274af-62d2-4a6d-bc5a-ff34b2fa2d83
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All the king's horses & all the king's men have a lot to answer for
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18 days ago
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Europeans when asked to help unblock the strait of Hormuz:
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18 days ago
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'hastily' is the key word here. If he'd taken his time there would be no Co-op freakout. Lesson learned I hope.
18 days ago
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Hugh Keogh
Sorcha NĂ Nia
3 months ago
the catchiest sex-ed BOP you will ever hear
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Like David Lo Pan?
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21 days ago
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21 days ago
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Wombles' eyes are on the front of their head, suggesting that they are predators.
21 days ago
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Me listening to BBC 5 Live Breakfast when they don't have the proper presenters
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21 days ago
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I love this thing. It contains so much booze that it triggers the 'over 18?' alert on automated checkouts
21 days ago
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If the Straits of Hormuz are still bollocksed in 3 weeks can we maybe have the Boat Race there?
22 days ago
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Not satisfied with blowing up cars & spaceships this prick now wants to blow up my kettle, well it's not happening, you can keep your racist electrons
www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home...
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Elon Musk’s Tesla set to start supplying UK homes with electricity
Ofgem gives Tesla Energy Ventures green light to provide electricity for households
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/tesla-electricity-uk-elon-musk-home-supplier-b2936961.html
22 days ago
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Greg Davies: well done the team of two, you got all your ships through the Straits of Hormuz Audience: [applause] Alex Horne: Well Greg let's have another look at the last ship [The ship is blown to pieces] Audience: [Oooooohhhh]
22 days ago
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Can't figure out if this is good or bad news for Mariah Carey
www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...
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Secret of hedgehog hearing discovered at far beyond human range
Researchers played a sountrack to hedgehogs to identify the frequency of sounds they can hear
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c8d52n0dnzro
23 days ago
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They've got an A3 laminator for sale in the Post Office in Blackheath. Now I don't NEED one of these, but what a stationery boss weapon.
23 days ago
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BBC 5Live there giving Omid Djalili a platform without questioning his batshit assertions about the bombed school.
23 days ago
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25 days ago
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Bertrand Russell could have seen the premier of Wagner's Ring Cycle and Carry On Camping
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25 days ago
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"I was weighed and they said Mr President, we've never found anyone less wanting"
25 days ago
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Is he thinking of Mithridates the Great?
26 days ago
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Best crossover ever but no-one ever talks about it smh
26 days ago
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26 days ago
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May have mis-heard but I swear a lady in Greenwich Park this morning had a miniature dachshund called He-Man.
26 days ago
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reposted by
Hugh Keogh
Caitlin
27 days ago
I have watched this approximately 47 times and laughed out loud 47 times
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All these police officers tried to arrest him at the same time & he still escaped. Slippery bastard.
28 days ago
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Ohhhh so that explains the Christmas lights tweet, wow, had no idea.
28 days ago
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"Whose y-fronts are these?" "It's a thong, baby." "Whose thong is this?" "It's the vicar's." "Who's the vicar?" "The vicar's stuck up a drainpipe baby. The vicar's stuck up a drainpipe."
28 days ago
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