as you all can tell, the autobots are a lovely bunch . open enrollment starts today .

frag off, the only relationship i'm willing to dance with is my two-step part in your two-bit demise . no matter how much gaudy decor or decal you try to smather over your dried prune body, you'll be a blink and a blotch in the autobot books that no one will even read .

bragging about dispatching bots who could be as small as your tiniest digit is no boast . that facial hair adds more weight to your words than its actual, quantifiable density .

I WILL STICK A NEEDLE IN YOUR FATASS FOREHEAD AND INJECT ACID AND IT WON'T EVEN HAVE AN ALTER FROM YOUR UTTER LACK OF A BRAIN .

help yourself by actually being useful for once in your pointless life, amico .

don't piss me off . i say, while pissed off already, clearly fuming .

( projecting period cramps i mean more parental loss on blaster, side audials wraggling in circles like wands twirling their evil spells )

are you guys stupid .

( servo pressed against the tank of perfectly preserved and posed as if alive in nature instead of formaldehyde dinosaur chicken nuggets . ) i miss my kids .

mio dio, do you know ANYTHING besides how to be a WASTE OF MY TIME AND A PAIN IN MY AFT?!?!??? DON'T TELL ME TO QUIET DOWN . ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU CAN'T EVEN SPELL ANY OF THE WORDS I'VE BEEN SAYING SINCE ETERNITY. INCLUDING AND ESPECIALLY ' A ' HoW- do you NOT know WHERE. HE. IS .

DO YOU KN O W how UNPROFESSIONAL THIS BEHAVIOR IS??? you are NOT LUCKY- but an actual animated AMBULATING MIRACLE that it was ME dialing your commline and not RODIMUS, OH you are just the WHITE HARE'S PAW of a PUTRID PAWN WHO'S BEEN SLUMMING IT UP ON THE RIGHT SQUARE AT THE RIGHT TIME, i have HAD IT

PICK UP THE FUCKING PHONE, YOU USELESS SACK OF LARD .

⠀ ( slicer's so nice t' me . ) 💭 . 😊 . ⠀

( ?!?!?!??? BAWKING AT HIS BIG AUDIAL. WHAT?!?!? ringing HIM?!?!? ringing WHEELJACK??? NOT picking up any of HIS rings, but having the NERVE, the NUTS and the BOLTS! TOO! TO RING. HIM. LETTING IT DIAL OUT THEN COMMING RIGHT BACK WITH A VOICEMAIL ) YOU PIECE OF SLAG. DON'T RING ME ???

WORTHLESS INGRATE. ALL SO WORTHLESS. YOU'RE ALL so WORTHLESS. not you, grimlock. yes, you're my silly Billy. my scrunchie wrunchie. my goobie woobie. my oogie ( nuzzling a simulated dinosaur in his simulated version of their extinction except he invents ways to save them from various scenarios

( he cancels on the first unanswered ring then comms again, repeat, rinse, insane repeat. it CAN'T be HIS reception. he gets GREAT reception. obviously. perhaps even better than that little freak, red alert. nah- that would actually drive him crazy. and he's not crazy. tall audials are raised

( alright. since that Nerd doesn't want to pick up. sending a comm to blaster. come on.... be Useful for once in your stupid.. downtrodden.. washed up spark . pacing circles around his lab. accidentally tripping over a part of his once alive experiment and cursing as he kicks it across the room )

the base feels so barren already . ( words slicked sardonic, his side antennae wraggle with irritation as he crawls around his wreckage, trying to scrounge whatever useful parts he can. the irony of magnus's next words only irritate him further, audials upright, electricly spitting upwards in its

( really? at this hour ?? you're going to do that? to announce that??? so publicly too ??? primus, who knew his .. 'leader' to be so lecherous .. ew. about to swipe away but- OH. WAIT. ' COMMING ! ' ... THANK PRIMUS HE READ THAT WRONG . an arc of electricity rainbows his audials together,

­­ ­ ­­ ­­­ wheeljack? splicer? even greatness has synonyms.