I read this as coming from the dog

Wife’s out of town with one of the kids and so far I have napped twice today

Starting to get presumably AI-generated mail in LinkedIn. None of these things are true.

the sepoys would like a word…

that’s 2 things I have in common with The Pope

Spent 2 hours on intermittent hold with AT&T only to have them hang up on me.

who you callin’ dense?

Saw this in the wild yesterday. How do people live like this?

when you eat two berries at the same time

a solid 4 but a 6 on my back

Always interesting when you get the car back from the valet and the steering wheel is sticky

Please tell me I’m not the only one that sees this

At least the spam phone calls are using interesting names

I think my wife and I are the only adults my age that I know who have never smoked weed

I guess Spelling Bee is not weed-friendly

Booooo

This to me is similar to why I don’t get the stigma attached to having an accent. It means you speak more than one language. That’s badass.

We are rewatching Game of Thrones and are watching Stranger Things season 4 so we are seeing a lot of Tom Wlaschiha (complimentary)

Didn’t realize we were out of jelly when I started making a sandwich so I had my first ever peanut butter and lingonberry sandwich

Kinda like this guy

Didn’t think I would top this score and yet www.maptap.gg April 10 97🔥 98🔥 96🔥 98🎯 99🎯 Final score: 978

how I used to practice jestermaxxing

today I described Whataburger as “mustard forward”

@evilmopacatx.bsky.social wanna buy a restaurant with me?

@peterpaulrubens.bsky.social just found your account - thought you might enjoy this bsky.app/profile/gabi...

new avi, blue checkmark? who does @jcsalterego.bsky.social think he is? the audacity!

Don’t think I’ll ever top this 🧩 Puzzle #982 🤔 5 guesses ⏱️ 10s 🔗 alphaguess.com/982

I wonder if @briangaar.bsky.social has this…

Probably my best day ever! www.maptap.gg March 30 95🏅 99🎯 93🏆 99🎯 99🎯 Final score: 974

Fell off a cliff www.maptap.gg March 26 100🎯 97🔥 98🔥 99🎯 48🫣 Final score: 834

@jcsalterego.bsky.social this must be why I never see a blue check by your name

Me: 🎶I can’t feel my face when I’m with you 🎶 My dentist: I get that a lot

Finally finished watching Murder at the End of the World. Too slow. Bad ending. Was drawn in by the actors (Clive Owen, Joan Chen) but not worth the investment of time.

wife’s out of town so you know what that means

me every Spring Food $200 Data $150 Rent $800 Crawfish $3,600 Utility $150 someone who is good at the economy help me budget this. my family is dying

aww yeah

nearing the point where I will only shop at Costco and HEB

this makes it sound like the weather’s been Milkshake Ducked

Sometimes Spelling Bee gets me

just replaced our printer you know what that means

Doing something right with my timeline

So he’s going to make the whole world follow China’s lead and go green…

We still have an old HD tv that we can use for consoles. Just hooked up the N64, the Wii and the WiiU. Wish I had kept my Game Cube.

now if she could get Bruce Springsteen to dance while she plays…

should have waited until Mar 10 to file

starting a new job tomorrow new level of Sunday Scaries unlocked

love that the Bridgerton family is turning into the Benetton family

How cool is this? Lost 19th century film by Méliès discovered at the Library of Congress: not "seen by anyone in likely more than a century" He pioneered jump cuts, double exposure, black screens, forced perspective Watch it here:

maybe this will summon @darthbluesky.bsky.social