Nikto here, after several months, I am breaking my silence to debunk the callout against me as well as expose who my attackers are.

@satinstitch.isfluffy.fyi hey before you rush to defend someone with no context, here you go bsky.app/profile/dood...

I will show you all the power of SARDINES!

Perhaps you should try a healthier alternative! Sardines contain loads of omega-3 fatty acids. Very healthy ingredients for sure! 20.5. They also contain plenty of DHA, EPA, potassium, calcium and various vitamins.

>>Tyrant Valvatorez event when

Fabulous! Miss Felicia, I am humbled by your generosity! It warms this vampire's heart! Please make it out to "my biggest fan, fenrich!"

Oh! A thousand apologies! I was thinking out loud! My Steward, fenrich is a very big fan! How much for an autograph?

Oh! Felicia! Fenrich would love to get her autograph!

"A solitary existence is one that isn't worth living. My allies, nay, my friends, are missing, and I've come to this realm to find them, and yet, I find a new friend in you. It's quite interesting how things turn out for us villains, yes?" +

"Well Majora, everyday we take the chance of allowing the evil in our hearts to take over. We do what we must to suppress these urges, my friend. Every day, I crave human blood, but I made a promise, and a promise is the most sacred vow. This is a long road but be thankful you don't walk alone!"

PRINNY RULE NUMBER ONE

"I propose a toast, to new friends!" The demon lord takes a hefty swig and gives a thumbs up. Sweet and spiced, with a creamy and decadent taste! This is certainly a masterpiece! "Such a wonderful and exquisite taste! Nothing in all of the underworld compares!"

What an interesting collective! Shinobi culture is quite interesting!

The vampire takes it with a courteous bow and smile. He looks over it and nods. "Majora! This seems like quite an expensive gift! I am humbled, I shall cherish this forever! My first souvenir from Termina!"

Pain? Is that his name, or some sort of nickname?

Good evening everyone! Lord Valvatorez here reminding you all to stay healthy, drink plenty of water and enjoy life!

"And do you.. Like that? I guess you'd made a wonderful detective, you could die and not lose progress, but.. Seems cruel, really. "

"You're an android, but you've lived different experiences exclusive to you. No other Conner would have that, realistically, yes?"

Valvatorez sees this shit and SCREECHES

"So you must wear whatever your programming dictates? No room for personalization?"

The most verbose and concise Yosuke has ever been, and of course it's him simping.

>just say my man is banned from existing

>The vampire doesn't care. He's dead set on the re-education of this Shadow. No way can such a lowly specimen be allowed to run loose! "I fucking dare you DOOD. You want to act like a lowly prinny, you will be TREATED as such. "

>Valvatorez slaps Yosuke, rather abruptly and harshly. "You FORGOT to say DOOD! Try it again!"

"If you will not be dealt with reasonably, then I believe I shall have to re-educate you myself! And I shall be extra brutal for ruining my vacation!" >He gives a dramatic coat flail "I am Lord Valvatorez! Prepare! Rule number one! You will include 'dood' in every line you say!"

And he easily catches it! He lets out a soft cough and speaks with a dignified tone. "Excuse me, but it seems you've misplaced your knife. Please refrain from throwing objects!"

"But of course! Comfortable shoes with functionality are essential for the modern man! Perhaps I could go to the Rosen Queen co and find you a pair?"

"Such a nice outfit for a police officer! It's eye catching, but are you agile while wearing such a uniform?"

"We must not have a Cyber-Life in Hell. And your outfit is very snazzy! A well dressed man is one to be respected you know!"

"Cyber-life? If we're talking about the same moon, I believe I'm responsible for any damages... Then again, they looked nothing like you."

"Something I've learned is that half of life is making mistakes, and the other is dealing with said mistakes! If you wish to make amends I will make you a promise, I will help you! Though I am a demon, everyone deserves a chance to improve!" +

Unfortunately, I believe the Moon is occupied, perhaps you could try Mars?

This is what 400 years of starving yourself does to a man Twink-ification

"Oh, trust me! I used to be called Tyrant Valvatorez, demons AND humans were terrified of me! Constantly offering me tribute! I did go a little mad with power. It happens to the best of us. "

"A milk bar you say? How interesting! Then again, only natural there'd be some sort of public house. " He takes concern over their comment. "Majora, everyone deserves a chance at redemption! I too was an unwelcome person, a tyrant feared by humans and demons alike! Show no fear, my friend!"

Truth be told, most gods I've encountered can be as temperamental as a small child. Something to do with the power, I assume.

Something about that white haired fellow is odd. He seems familiar in a way I cannot place my fingers on.

"So apparently, the best fish can be found in Zora's domain, but the rock roast sounds delicious. Then there's pumpkin soup... Ordon goat cheese. PAH! So many choices!"

"You're from Termina, yes? I've read in travel brochures that you've got plenty of amazing meals and such a beautiful world! I've even heard there's a band of "fish" people who play rock and or roll music! Perhaps I could pay you to be my guide. "

"Someone mentioned other vampires. I'd love to meet some of my "kin" or what have you!"

"Perhaps you and I should reconvene and go out for a meal! It has been a few hundred years, I could cheat on my diet every now and then-" Salmon with lemon and butter. "That sounds like an amazing way to spend the day!"

Off to bed!

"Sardines contain Vitamin D, which helps the body to absorb calcium, they're an amazing food for anyone! However, I can't deny that a tuna steak sounds fairly delicious about now... It's been a few hundred years. "

>Haha Valvatorez funny sardine man >He only eats sardines because they provide the bare minimum of nutrition a vampire needs and is a form of self punishment for breaking a promise and he's basically starving

"Destroying the planet with the moon? Well, I can respect the theatrical flair, my lycanthrope companion is quite fond of said moon. " Valvatorez offers a dramatic cape flair and a bow as well! "Shall we cement our new friendship with sardines? I've the finest in all of Hades!"

"Tyrant Valvatorez, the Bloodthirsty King of Fear, the Blood-soaked Valvatorez of Absolute Evil, The King of Carnage and Atrocity!" ... "At least I was 400 years ago, now I'm just Valvatorez, president of Hades. Well met Majora!"

"Ha! Well, many years ago I was a world ending tyrant, and could Kay waste to entire cities without so much as a glance, but I made a promise, and you can NEVER break a promise!"

"Well, back in my youth, I was considered a tyrant, and I guess all vampires did have a similar fashion sense..."