Katniss cracks me up my bitch autistic

girl AI at the Panda drive thru…

unfortunately getting back into the biting my nails game

just realized my bed is too high up for a short king to hit it standing up… does anybody need a boxspring

men will literally start being mean to you once you reveal you don’t intend to fuck them… scary!!!

I can’t remember the last time something has been a big deal to me

men joking about starting an OF bc of gas prices… do it or you’re a pussy

who want me

bro donate to ME the rent is 50% my income

after about 15 years of vowing to always keep it real online I am now lying for attention

oomf asking the audience a question with replies off oh you evil bitch

Beatdick

you know it’s technically not gay if I’m only sexually attracted to men conceptually

there is no spoon girl…

the concept of Disney just openly having sex drugs and gore in their movies now

kind of feel like Marty Mauser at the end of Marty Supreme but instead of a newborn baby it’s a vape and a beer

me while some of y’all are playing checkers

10/10 boyfriend and I’m still down bad for like 9 hot guys somebody just gotta come kill me atp

fartobsession has unfollowed me

2021 was genuinely such an evil year

they don’t know that you can just Lay On The Ground and pretend to be drunk for a video for the internet…

The Fat Elvis is just a normal Elvis for a real eater like me

some of these just being normal things you can eat and some of them being actually insane

AI has killed so much joy for me… I can’t even jerk off to a video without having to thoroughly investigate the way the grass is moving now

neeed more hot and confident friends who don’t act like posing for a picture is physically painful

you know what yeah if you take a picture with me you actually die in 3 days it’s just a lil curse I have… so everyone who for some reason is deathly afraid to be in a picture with me, you’re right! trust your instincts. and if we do have a picture together… 😬

why’m I lowkey scared of my crush

“wyd this weekend” going to prison girl. going to prison.

ppl need to stop asking me “why Chicago” you’re not going to like my answer

girl I do not go to Lollapalooza

real live hot boys following my Instagram

is it weird that I slept in this?

mountin’ dewchebag 💚

I’m the leprechaun

kind of obsessed w leprechauns lately

green socks & beer

I’m not gonna keep trying to explain it, Australia wants me and in fact needs me

what the fuck?

initiating a hangout with your crush is the same thing as getting waterboarded it’s the exact same thing actually

this gotta be the least St. Patrick’s Day St. Patrick’s Day of all St. Patrick’s Days

don’t ask me no damn questions what is this Paper Magazine

I’m just gonna have to get used to being inconsiderate and pissing people off now that I’ve moved to Chicago… it’s something I don’t have much experience with

well I’m not gonna suddenly start levitating so I hope my neighbors get used to this loud ass creaky floor in my apt

idk what it is I’ve had a crazy kink for Irish douchebags lately

well good night

nothing I hate more than a college student like girl grow tf up

ain’t no way in hell I already got opps in this apartment building on day one bro 😭

thank god I finally have my own place girl fuck a roommate NO SHADE!!!

moving to Chicago today

St. Patrick’s Day Weekend got me St. Patrick’s Day Weakened