Cinematic parallels

Me playing as Kiriko:

Difficult to take British place names seriously

How it feels thanking both cars at a zebra crossing:

Asking my phone to set reminders:

Dover

Splitting trains and sending each half to a different location is cruel behaviour. What do you mean you have to pay attention to what half of the train you’re on? Scattering tourists and the inattentive across the land.

Up and out the door by 8am. But at what cost?

Woke up thinking it’s Wednesday

Times before 8am are evil

Finding 2026 glasses in my bag got me feeling like Deirdre

Being born in the 2000 must be rather convenient. Don’t have to worry about working out your age, it’s in the year

Almost lamped it within a minute of leaving the front door. Bets on whether I make it to the station

How wasn’t this already in place?

The next station is Oval. Oh, I thought it was more a tube shape.

Back to work 😮‍💨

Fucked up but funny. Why the Brits always gotta be quaint and dry-witted?

Tag yourself

What in the woolly muff is going on with these underwear?!

A film about Americans being their usual American selves. TC was a very convincing complete twat in the film. Would recommend for those with low anxiety.

I can just about hear snoring from the bedroom below. Gonna be a great night of sleep

The aesthetics of this game are too sexy. All done with pixel art too 🫦 (Blasphemous 2)

Baking gingerbread for Xmas. Yes, I am childish.

I pull a 10 pack and I pull no good shinies. To add insult to injury I get 4 lousy green butt plugs 😩

Finally got round to watching The Birdcage and I can see how it has ended up in the gay zeitgeist. Reminds me of Priscilla and Robin Williams and Nathan Lane play so well of each other.

Nice view to wake up to 😌

Screw Spotify Wrapped. What’s your Wikipedia Year In Review?

Found the perfect tree topper. Now I just need the tree.

Why is Roadhog’s lamp giving Grindr?

Lovely 🙂‍↕️ I’m usually stuck in my ways with music but this just sounds divine.

I should vet films before I go and watch them. Thought I’d have a chill evening at the cinema only for it to be an intensely disconcerting 2 hours. 2 couples walked out.

Games with long introduction videos/sequences: please stop, let me play 😭 (This is targeted at Hyrule Warriors today)

“From cocktails to cock-rings all in one 24 hour period”. This is dreadful 😂

Rubbing my legs together like a silent cricket to warm up my bed

Searching for guides on how to work tech is miserable. What do you mean every website is written by AI that has been told to write it like a recipe, life backstory and all, only to say “you can’t do that actually”? 😭

Love me a bit of fog

Why do I have a single white eyebrow hair?! I’m meant to be in my early thirties 😭

You + your favourite Pokémon

no one: Orpheus:

People really are stooping low when they send out phishing SMS about winter fuel payments

Post someone who looks good in a hat 👒

Does anyone?

Why is looking after plants a constant battle? 😭 They’re always under-watered but also over-watered while simultaneously being in too little sunlight and too much sunlight.

Not Instagram having the option to get AI to rewrite a story response for you 🙃Let’s make communication less personal

Living my cottage-core fantasy: picking blackberries off the brambles growing over the car park wall. Haven’t given me the shits yet either 🥰

Crazy how one email can ruin your good mood after a long weekend 🫩

Not the Hayward Gallery selling a book about breathtaking architecture that’s full of AI-generated buildings 🙃

Dropped a drink on myself at a show and then someone spilled their coke on me on the tube. What is this karma from?

Anyone wanna go halvsies on the AliExpress mini excavator?