I shoveled two cars out of their parking spots in an apartment complex. Came home, shoveled my suburban Vandalia driveway. Shoveled a path on the walk around the house. My body hurts.

Michael Bay Leaf

What is the most brilliant song in human history and why is it Limp Bizkit’s “Rollin’”?

Goblin mode

This mill conversation is IT @dannybkelly.bsky.social @dannyheifetz.bsky.social @craighorlbeck.bsky.social

Honored, excited, and privileged to be included in this year’s festivities. Tickets are still available. Cool article by my good friend, Brandon Berry. www.daytondailynews.com/entertainmen...

“Here’s the deal: A lot of words mean more than one thing.” - @dannybkelly.bsky.social 😆😂🤣

Toby Keith Urban Outfitters

The year is 2025. If your website, app, or content does not have a “dark mode,” I’m not interested.

Imagine: You’ve been elected POTUS. You and the Secretary of Health & Human Services have a press conference scheduled to address the nation about the potential dangers associated with a popular over-the-counter drug. Wouldn’t you make sure you can properly pronounce the drug’s name first?

Feeling super weird about being bipedal today. @dannyheifetz.bsky.social @dannybkelly.bsky.social @craighorlbeck.bsky.social

I had never heard of a Labubu until the South Park episode and now they’re everywhere.

Update: Civil War cancelled due to shooter being demographically uncooperative

what a humiliating way for don jr. to find out his dad sends birthday cards.

All I’m hearing on this pod is @dannyheifetz.bsky.social is basically real-life Happy Gilmore. @dannybkelly.bsky.social @craighorlbeck.bsky.social

Can you imagine being so brainwashed that a cracker barrel logo offends you? What the actual fuck

@dannybkelly.bsky.social Love the “stop trying to make fetch happen” point and the opposite Kyren Williams point. In other words: Fade fucking Twitter.

The wiggler from mario has anal beads vibes for sure

REPUBLICANS: Democrats and the deep state are colluding to undermine our elections!! ALSO REPUBS: Gerrymandering is good!

Does anyone do these anymore? Wild Wordle 1,506 3/6 ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

If Biden did this, Fox News and republicans would be f***ing hysterical www.cnbc.com/2025/08/01/t...

*this* is how desperate Trump is to distract from Epstein: -denaturalize Rosie O’Donnell -cane sugar in Coca-Cola -threaten Washington Commanders -Hillary’s emails -arrest Obama -arrest Kamala -arrest Oprah -arrest Beyoncé -arrest Al Sharpton

Blind Bob’s tonight with the band. 9pm.

Why doesn’t my life script include a brilliant, trailblazing entrepreneur who asks how much I make and offers to double it if I go work for him?

Trolley Stop tonight from 8-11pm. Free tunez.

“Nostalgia doesn’t require truth to feel powerful.”

Production note @dannyheifetz.bsky.social: Can you slow down a bit and annunciate a bit more when you say, “deep accuracy”? Sounds like you’re saying “deebaggery.” Daniel Jones’ deebaggery has outlasted his deep accuracy by a long shot.

So glad you guys led with the Selena Gomez Oreos. These little mfers BANG. @dannybkelly.bsky.social @dannyheifetz.bsky.social @craighorlbeck.bsky.social

In my bag on the instagram story editor

Scientists gonna science phys.org/news/2025-06...

Best day ever

Air show weekend in Vandalia. Time to flee the country.

I just saw a yard sign reading “KIDNEY NEEDED” with a phone number.

Apparently this is a controversial take but I 100% would sell as many photos/videos of my feet doing non-pornographic things for as much money as people would pay me to do them

The disparity btwn what’s actually happening in Los Angeles and the way it’s being mischaracterized is one of the biggest stress tests of modern media in recent memory. Botted socials, AI, old clips, declining literacy—it’s like seeing a broken emergency response system hit by a storm.

I officially declare this the greatest day in the history of the internet.

Hey Republicans: Has anyone ever suggested YOU should leave? Like…if you don’t like the Constitution, leave! Plain and simple. Go somewhere that doesn’t recognize basic human rights like freedom of religion (all religions, not just yours) and right to due process. Let’s see how ya like it there.

Read this today. We are so cooked. LISTEN TO THE SCIENTISTS, PLEASE!!!! I just can’t with you people… www.theguardian.com/environment/...

Unbelievable lol Rube Waddell take 2 on the ringer FF show 😆 once was not enough @dannyheifetz.bsky.social @dannybkelly.bsky.social @craighorlbeck.bsky.social

PEOPLE: *a bunch of bullshit*

Sheep + Republican = Sheepublican

Slept on my neck wrong two nights in a row. Feelin 35 going on 60. Ouch!

Julius Randle entered the league looking like Charles Barkley and dude is now Tim Duncan slim. My mind is broken.

I fuck with Mario Tennis

Life doesn’t need to be difficult in and of itself. We’ve chosen to make it that way.

Wooooooork

Forgot my earbuds. About to raw dog this flight. Wish me luck.

I recall a six week period of my life in which I sustained existence almost entirely on vodka and sprites, marlboro 27’s, domino’s pizza, peanuts, and citrus drop.

Now seeking backyard barbecues, gatherings, etc. I can “crash” by invitation. I’ll bring a cooler of La Croix and a dish if desired. Mostly just want to post up and talk with other folks’ house guests.

Amazing season for @clevelandcavaliers.bsky.social. Hate to see end, but that’s life sometimes. Pacers came to play. Gotta get back in the lab, fellas. A new season awaits. It’ll be here before we know it.