didn’t wear my earrings for a week, and my piercings are already closing up. speaking of which, i need to call my bttm real quick

if u got a nice one ur obligated to show

why do i always have the worst migraine 10 minutes before stand up meetings? and i only have these MWF. it’s like an automated response from my body 🤕

surprised that adult swim already put up first 4 episodes of rick and morty season 9 on hbo max. they’re still in the middle of airing season 9, they still got 3 more episodes left

we have a dashboard to track how many of us are token maxing. but that’s costing us so much money, so we’re trying something new. it’s called token mini-maxing. so this is when you minimize on how much you’re maxing on tokens

it’s all projections. homophobes aren’t afraid of gay people, they are afraid that they themselves are gay

living right above a bodega is dangerous because this morning i walk downstairs to get a bánh mì trứng for breakfast, and now i’m walking downstairs again to go get a bánh mì thịt nguội for lunch.

can the FDA approve new sunscreen ingredients already? i had to wait 4 weeks for my korean sunscreen to be delivered. by the time they got here summer is half over

mind if i do a rebrand?

devil wears prada 2 was mid, but doechii and gaga really ate with runway

and also by coincidence, so random, just by chance. who’d a thunk it, so remarkable and weird, right? it’s so great that this guy josh just happens to be here

had konjac noodle for dinner so i’m gonna skinnyyy any second now ⏳

why do i feel so awful rn? oh yeah, i forgot to eat

slack notification gave me IBS

i have this fear that i’m too oblivious to realize i’m a lolcow

triple sourced & timestamped it to tell everyone he’s a top

bordering on providing too much information. maybe it’s best i don’t need to post everything

the v1 was so claude-slopped that it’s dropping frames rendering bare bones data, yet leadership is asking for a data dense v2 by end of july 😪 broh, hire actual UI engineer if you wanna compete with the big names

wait, this is exciting

As a cost-cutting measure, Microsoft is pulling the plug on your grandpa’s life support. paletteswap.site/dif...

i can clock if someone has a vitamin d deficiency (not the one from the sun, the one from somebody’s son)

wait, you hate me? sorry, i already have a hater

bear and nikki halloween couple costumes?

i’m not downplaying the application of AI, but not everything needs AI, can we pop the bubble already?

i’m already terrified of my stalking skill even tho i’m only medium crazy. i can’t imagine what info y’all have on/against me and choosing to keep quiet for now

no motivation to get out of bed today. somebody come grab it and pull me out of bed pls

happy monday fellow corporate workers 💙

ugh, who decided that august will also have 31 days and no holiday?

sorry guys, i lied 🤥 forgive me

y’all gave me false hope on it happening on the 4th

feeling floppy lately

i can go another week without a haircut i can go another week without a haircut i can go another week without a haircut i can go another week without a haircut i can go another week without a haircut i can go another week without a haircut i can go another week without a haircut

ugh i miss popcap games and downloading visual styles from deviantart so much

teenagers outside being too loud with the fireworks — yes, i’m that age 😪

makes me want a hotdog real bad

you’re talking to the king of i just happen to be here

just realized i’m lord farquaad coded, and i’m ready to embrace villainy

do y’all have me muted? be honest

obsessed with every break free note change clip i see on my fyp

i just want soup noodle and horror comedy movies, is that too much to ask tor?

either a long makeout session or a cry session sound so good rn

remember the unibody macbook pro back in 2012 with the physical battery indicator light? i wish apple could add that to the airpods case, bc i’m tired of popping open my airpods case only to find out the case has 1% battery left and each pod only has 15% battery 🥲

being on-call during pride is actually so homophobic

life’s a mess rn, who wants shots?

need a pearl and nikki crossover

my vacuum broke and i’m contemplating getting a dyson 🤔

you think 6 months without kirk is hard? try 1 day without hole next door. our community’s suffering is way worse then yours

bold of you to accuse me of being mean. i’m clearly below average

monies pwease 🥺

what a good day for videos not to load on bsky 🥲