If the rule is that—as a result of your taking it upon yourself to spoil the long running tradition of peaceful transfer of power through your staggering wickedness, dishonesty, and mob violence—you lose your ability to bank w/JP Morgan Chase, I can live with that. www.nytimes.com/2026/02/21/b...

The Gen X urge to not do what you tell me.

Kid just showed up at state. Stretched. Had a snack. And dropped a second-and-a-half off her personal best split in the 200 free relay. Apparently swims faster with hundreds of people screaming. Same.

See my forthcoming: “The Supreme Court as Jam Band: Why These Self-Indulgent Concurrences and Dissents are Too Damn Long and About as Vital and Necessary as a 45 Minute Mandolin Solo on Sugar Magnolia”

When I taught ESL, I had students give reports about where they were from. After hearing from several Central American students who said they had only 3 seasons an exasperated Russian student said: “Summer, autumn, spring! But VHERE IZ VINTER?!” I’ve asked this a lot lately. But now it’s snowing.

DOM DOM Logan: What do we got? Briscoe: Looks like a teenage driver used this guy’s car and reset all the mirrors. Poor idiot never saw’em comin’. Logan: You mean the teenage kids or whoever off’ed him? Briscoe: In the end, what’s the difference?

Great Horned Owl appropriating Barn Owl culture, SMH.

Putting it out there that I would make an excellent chief legal officer of Goldman Sachs.

Olympic ski coverage gains *nothing* from drone-o-vision that makes up for the *extremely annoying* drone noise. Death to drones. (Ski sounds are dope, actually. Why do you hate swooshing?)

If it is genuinely hard for things that are capable of understanding to understand things, imagine how hard it is for things that are not capable of understanding to understand things.

The pandogticon was bad this week.

I love the Winter Olympics. Only thing I’d change is adding Judo. You may think judo’s a summer sport. Wrong. Judo is an *always* sport. It’s always judo season somewhere. Snowing outside? Put on your winter gi & do some judo. Love the Cold Olympics, but I’m missing the Warm Olympics’ judo coverage.

This is not how I thought the steampunk alternate future would be achieved, but okay.

“Yeah, sorry, but that’s definitely a security.”

The lack of dominance of my home state of Utah in biathlon is such a rake-stomping policy failure. I mean, c’mon! Probably the highest concentration of gun/ski-owners on the planet on the planet.

Attorney: “Your Honor, we appear to have a Freaky Friday situation on our hands. It seems that counsel’s brain has been swapped out for that of child who is now trying to muddle through by pretending to be an adult lawyer.”

I mean, geez.

Judge: Counselor, it is clear that you have already won. I’m assuming you have no further questions for the witness. Attorney: Just another 20 minutes of redirect your honor. Really wanna zing this guy, you know?

Satoshi: “So I think we can forget about existing money and existing banks, and gradually open a system of accounts which will displace the government money.” The President of the United States (who makes the world’s reserve currency): The U.S. should be the “crypto capital of the world.”

Tired: Please give me large sums of money in sacks or a briefcase. Wired: Please “invest” in my cryptocurrency “business.”

If it’s winter…then where’s the @&$#! snow, you stupid rodent!? Snow or it didn’t happen! (Sorry. It is not snowing here. I am upset.)

Also trying to parse all the emails that read like they were written by a concussed golden retriever I think I finally get why these guys are so enthusiastic about getting chatbots to write for them

“We hear tale of a party. You wouldn’t mind us coming in. We hungry as dogs. Woof woof.”

“Overhaul” huh? That is certainly a word. Wonder if it has a meaning that fits here. D’oh!

Same energy.

For all you federalists out there, “kangaroo courts” means state courts. Also, it’s absurd to ascribe to the VP the things he actually said. Absurd!

I’m sorry, which one of those twins got nominated for an Oscar?

Stayed in the 92y as a summer associate and after an all nighter and a fairly embarrassing pro-bono court appearance and loss, I had dinner here. Top 5 meal I have eaten. Sad it’s closed. www.newyorker.com/magazine/200...

Sometimes Reviewer 2 is right:

Counterpoint: I don’t think this would be a win for everybody.

Nice try, internet ad, but I already fly “semi-private” (i.e., in coach, but don’t talk to people).

If they capture you, they’ll force you to learn all the Finnish noun declensions. I wouldn’t risk it.

Tonight I ended up having to explain to my kids about Alf and how he craved the family cat. Listen, I you don’t teach your kids about Alf they’ll just learn about him on the streets.

Important.⬇️

Mr. Justice Brandeis has entered the chat: Whitney v. California, 274 U.S. 357 (1927) (“Fear of serious injury cannot alone justify suppression of free speech and assembly. Men feared witches and burnt women. It is the function of speech to free men from the bondage of irrational fears.”)

Abundance agenda for bears, when?

This Christmas I learned an important lesson: “The boys in the NYPD choir” is meant to be ironic. There is no choir. It’s Christmas Eve again in the drunk tank, and the cops are also drunk and singing about home. Follow me for more holiday insights that were obvious to everyone else.

Backyard trail cam caught another one of them giant striped-tailed squirrels.

My kid has to do a high school paper on a book. Cuz I’m such a fun dad, we’re reading Hannah Arendt together. This bit jumped out at me:

If your law firm doesn’t have a style guide then it’s not a law firm but just a bunch of lawyers sharing a building.

WRT One Battle After Another: I believe it was Chekov who said that if you show Benicio Del Toro in karate pants in Act II, he has to have an epic karate fight in Act III, SMH.

If you’re cold, they’re cold. Let them in. (Photo credit to kid heading to swim practice.)

👇

My sister sent me this picture from the car wash in the town I’m from.

If you spent 4yrs giving cover to a dangerously incompetent, malevolent sociopath but then on J6 you did the only thing you were lawfully allowed to do, you should get one (1) pat on the back but then withdraw from public life in shame & ignominy & forever be remembered as an unprincipled sycophant.

“Once” is a Christmas movie. youtu.be/JMqKOt7R_K8?...

10yo: MY TEACHER SAYS TO USE MY INSIDE VOICE BUT THIS IS JUST MY NORMAL SPEAKING VOICE!!!

One cancelled flight, two delays, and *two* ticketing errors. But in 22 hrs (not the 8 to 9 I’d planned), I went from London to Salt Lake City and it behooves us who live in an age of wonders to take a deep breadth, appreciate the miracle of flight, and try not to be dicks. I’m working on it.