no greenlander ever called me a libtard

I will tell you all about the Halloween blizzard, the metrodome deflation, the 35W bridge collapse, Prince, the skyways, and how often I run the mpls lakes

Last night during the wolves game (goddammit wolves), the Arby’s “Meat & 3 Box” commercial ran 13y/o: what’s the “& 3”, a piece of broccoli, a corn tortilla, and one other thing?

Imagine water balloons being what broke the camel’s back

Two days ago it was Elissa Slotkin. Last week it was Jerome Powell. Before that, Mark Kelly. Weaponizing the justice system against your opponents is an authoritarian tactic. The only person not being investigated for the shooting of Renee Good is the federal agent who shot her.

I just have to say that if you're watching season 2 of the Pitt, you know that Rollins' declaration that every American gets one piece of broccoli is a little too on the nose it just may kill you

The obamas really live rent-free in these people’s heads

Current earliest ice-out date in the metro is March 11, 1878 Let’s goooooooo Minnesota, let’s make history

Calling an ICE dickhead a 'soup sandwich' should be more of a thing

*quietly puts back whole crown of broccoli and selects one stalk*

Tiny Johnson always looks like he’s fresh from the beauty bar, with his BBL cheeks and smooth-Ken-crotch forehead

Me when I’m in the crosswalk and someone comes flying up the street too fast

Omg I never want to see this idiot associated with the stone arch bridge ever again, he doesn’t even go here

The thing about minneapolis is that we all clear ice from our sidewalks and if you’re the one neighbor who doesn’t for no good reason, nobody likes you and then you bitch about Minneapolis being awful and you leave We will always clear ice for neighbors in need

Hey guys remember Anton Lazzaro, the GOP operative who was BFFs with all the state GOP bigwigs and was convicted of sex trafficking? I bet that’s who Twenty Gallon Gnome is talking about here

Says the woman dressing up in costume cowboy hats and playing with her mother's makeup

It’s wild, for ages women have had to put up with heckling from goons like this and if we challenged them we were emotional bitches these dudes are so fucking fragile with their cosplay masculinity

it’s like how when I wear a Lynx tshirt, I play pro bball

These fuckers

Feel like riding around the neighborhood and heckling some ICE agents today

Y’all I feel like the 84 years meme from titanic How has it only been one week since 2026 began, feels like November

Anecdotally, it’s my neighbors with plow service who have the most abysmal sidewalks at the moment

Walz is taking the high road and allowing himself to be the DFL fall guy for Amy Bock and her band of merry thieves I appreciated his leadership during covid and his friendliness when I’ve run into him out and about. He’s a politician but he’s also just a good guy.

Hey @startribune.com! Congrats, my 80-year-old parents in Northern MN - who looked forward to the interaction they got from their daily outing to the local filling station to buy a newspaper - just got in an argument trying to figure out how to log in to read the news on their phones

I’m old enough to think someone who’s a professional YouTuber should get a real job

Oh my god my redneck North Carolina rural white nationalist baby boomer maga aunt has just said the words, “I don’t like what Donald trump is doing, I’ve been tricked.”

Its wild when my maga neighbors here in edina make fun of “trailer trash” for having junk and numerous cars in their front yards, meanwhile they park their four cars in the driveway because the garage is too full of stuff

I really hate Christmas tree corpse season

Welp hopefully someone boxes up a nap to give me tomorrow after staying up for that wolves game

Haha these people living in my house with me have just asked what’s for dinner *tonight* since I’ve been in the kitchen all day hahaha oh man what a bunch of funny jokers lololol

Meanwhile in MN, these same folks are bitching that the state legislature mandated paid sick time

I am off to walk the dog and listen to Christmas carols and sing along at an audible volume and greet neighbors and talk to the dog about how good she is and wave at people skating at the neighborhood rink wild that I am the neighborhood eccentric for embracing these little joys

love that sociopathic grandiose narcissist trump probably truly considers himself a victim in all of this exposé tots and pears

on the MAGA application is there a checkbox for "punchable face" because it feels like there's a checkbox for "punchable face"

I have a 75lb show golden retriever, why did I think baking cookies for holiday teacher gifts was a great idea

The black mn license plates are really starting to piss me off because there’s a direct correlation between them and the most aggressive, worst drivers on the road

No one loves to use the shaka more than a middle-aged born-and-raised land-locked Minnesota white guy behind the wheel of a Land Rover defender that’s never seen more than the mean streets of deephaven

I’m already at that January-ish phase of winter where you just leave your snowpants on inside so you don’t have to keep changing

Oh I'm really looking forward to buying local, in-season bananas this winter in Minnesota

Yes can’t wait to wear a cashmere sweater and carry my designer bag to sit in a big tube of people’s farts for several hours

Is being a pedestrian in Edina particularly bad, or are drivers and bike riders just awful as a whole

Everyone knows that trump needs a friend in the nyc mayors office, right? Adams was in his pocket and he knows he’s effed probably six ways to Sunday if mamdani doesn’t fall in line?

It’s the guns. It’s the guns driving the whole national divide. It’s. The. Guns.

what in the actual journalistic integrity is this? dude has a reporter dismembered with a bonesaw at the embassy but sure jan, he's turned over a new leaf

Got my flu and covid shots Monday, took one round each of acetaminophen and ibuprofen over 18 hours for various mild aches/chills, but the easiest round of annual vaccines for me (40-something) yet Please get your shots, y’all, and get them for your kids too

Wait but I literally asked our insurance adjuster about the hydrant that sits on the corner of our property and joked that we should get a discount and he said it doesn’t work that way guess I’ll refer AmFam to good ol Markwayne here

hey @ncaa.bsky.social and @espn.com and anybody else profiting off college sports, fucking knock it off or give my dad your direct line to help him find the gopher games he wants to watch. He subscribes to every fucking thing and it’s a full time job logging him in and walking him through it

did anybody check the job postings for this administration, was the sole qualification "must possess a punchable face"