I'm waiting for the Pepsi commercial where instead of Kylie Jenner it's a bunch of drones dropping Pepsi's

Honestly

I fucking hate Chuck shumer and wish hed just go lie down already

I have nooooo patience rn. And by that I mean I am practicing so much when I really just wanna be a big bitch

You ever feel so weirdly completely normal that you realize you must be crazy?

Trying to make it a big deal that my office burned ish and in 4 months I found a new space, expanded, furnished them, and hired 3 people. It's kinda fucking crazy. Idk if I can even explain how much work it is. While also working normal hours. And doing holidays and birthdays galore.

Moving all my stuff from my burnt office to my new office and getting IKEA and woooooo there's a lot in my brain

Dedman

But did you see the back of this snow pile

We're gonna move the snow finally guys. ... Move it into huge piles at intersections so you can't see around it

It's my birthday and I hung out with my two hot sexy partners naked and didn't get get to touch those peepees

Happy large boulder the size of a small boulder day for all who celebrate

Psychology says people who read articles that say psychology says people who are people who read psychology articles

Hi gang, friendly neighborhood therapist here reminding you that staying informed aka doom scrolling isn't the only way to prepare for things getting worse. Going for a jog and stretching and meditating in the sun are self care and preparation. You'll need it maybe more than you'll need every detail

Resolution - don't try so hard

Mike on stranger things "one more fight and it'll finally be over" Me "I can cancel my netflix subscription"

2026 starting off with a bang

All I want for my 33rd birthday is to be a ho for my boys all day.

Pete hegseth is mad the scouts aren't gay anymore

Why can I not find porn of orod from prince of Persia?

Down with chuck

Haha so long cheney

My dick really did numbers today yeesh. Where were y'all when I had an only fans

Why is everything named milk and honey?!?!?!?!?!

Why does Kash Patel always look like he just trusted a fart and shouldn't have?

A diner called greasy grains

Stop with the ai porn y'all jfc

Guess what I'm my own boss and not gonna fire myself charlie Kirk was a piece of shit. Dead people can be pieces of shit.

Track me bitch ass hegseth

Okay this. I talk about this all the fucking time. I grew up watching fucking hey Arnold. That's what did it. That and my schools character counts program.

#fcf this kind of morning

This is just... Crash bandicoot

Click bait science articles are like "you'll never guess where micro plastics are now" and it's a picture of fucking american cheese

Going to Chicago at the end of the month. Recs please. also hit me up if you're hot.

Here's the thing. I'm actually so tired of my house. I'm so tired of it never ever being ready to host because there's so many things to do. I'm so tired of all of my quality time with my husband being projects. Just tired from all of it. And broke. There's nothing but dread. How do people do this?

Weekend fun

Attention please #fcf

I'm stressed and anxious so I just want my back blown out.

I need something to be good at again

Feel WEEEEIIIRRRRRDDDDD

I'd like to shit on Pete hegseth

Gotta read more Gotta let myself play more Gotta spend less Gotta go out more to socialize Gotta fix the bathroom Gotta work more to make more Gotta have more time off Gotta work out more Gotta clean the house Gotta relax more Gotta find alone time Gotta give more attention to other p

Ben Cardin can choke on netenyahus tiny balls

Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiyyyeeeeeeeeee don't know what's about to happen

Minty menty bees

JD Vance has never read the constitution

Who's gonna tell me how to be a person

I think maybe I hate the spring

I've become a pure raw juice bro