In a surprising turn of events, I need another surgery before the end of the year. 2025 is trying to kill me :)

Didn't get to see one of my best friends play live bc im always working. Never have breaks. Fading out of people's lives. Its okay.

MFF was a bust. I'm tired and broken. I don't know how to keep going.

I have failed myself again this year. Im tired of trying.

Im going to crash the fuck out :)

Ive been without my sleeping meds for 3 days. My insurance is changing so I dont have any doctors picked that can continue my budging disc's in my back. Im working 2 jobs right now and I'm so burnt out. Can I get a little grace?

I am realizing that being a "one" person business is becoming harder. The wants and needs for merch to bring to cons get long but the time for prep gets shorter. I dont know how much longer I can keep this up

I'm really trying not to feel imposter syndrome about MFF since I work my ass off for conventions, but.. theres so many larger fursuit makers going, and I'm just this small-time maker. I'm nervous.

Hamburger Help Me. I got a lot of work done and now Im in migraine hell from the weather. God I swear im not your strongest solider, please stop.

I dont belong here. Im never asked what I want. Im never called the right things. Im tired. The battle has become harder.

I can't do this anymore.

I feel really low lately. I exist for other people. I dont remember when I did something for me last. Im so tired.

"Sometimes I forget why I wanted to live." Jfc.

Sorry, please excuse the mess; My hearts been pouring through my chest.

We are all dogs in god hot car.

It's hard. It's hard sitting with yourself when you're suicidal. You have to be so careful with every move. Taking meds but never too much. Remembering to feed yourself. Trying to remember how to be happy or learn to fake it. It's hard.

Getting real tired of this shit. If my opinion means nothing why am I here.

I hate that I love the fursuits my abusor's partner makes. I don't like seeing them on my timeline, but I also enjoy them on my timeline. Ugh. Im conflicted.

Hell, I feel trapped in my own body. How do I not be so anxious all the time?

Feeling very trapped in my own home.

Im caretaking for my disabled mother, basically running the kitchen for a family of 3 and the groceries for it, fursuit making full time. Im tired. Am I allowed to take a break? There's always something that prevents it. So far all the breaks ive gotten in years have been because I couldn't work.

Im very burnt out. I dont know how to make it better. Lately my health has been dog shit and I need surgery after megaplex. Im just.. drifting without a purpose it feels. Is what I create important? Does it matter? What am I doing with my life

8 days. In 8 days, I turn 30. An age I thought I'd never see. I'm still processing this.

Did I just spend $155 on 4 shirts? Yes. Support your artist friends!!

You check our accounts like your check your empty bank account.

Today was not as expected but whatever. Im too tired to keep up with it.

I should have loved you better.

Im just fucking trying to order some punk clothing for the concert im going to and my tots are too big for anything I want >:(

Grass Dreams and Waxwings 🌱 (revenge for @leafesprout.bsky.social !! 1.5hrs)

There's like two people id date rn but neither one wants to :,) Ill get over it it just sucks bc each person im super close to and it just is arg

This is getting so out of hand. I feel like I dont even have the rights to my own body.

depression resistance 📈📈📈 heat resistance 📉📉📉

Realizing I will never create something GREAT. I will never write something great, make a great monument. And thats okay. I'm okay with just being... okay. Because to create is what I was meant to do. They cant take that away from me.

I love having bpd bc i love feeling like everyone is mad at me. I wish my brain fucking worked.

Got Kimbap from the store and I am so excited. Love kimbap

Im really tired of being nice. Its hard to sit here and play pretend like you didnt ruin my life. I could have married Jay and maybe have been so happy. But you. You fucking ruined me. The only good thing I got out of your existence was Remy being in my life and being my fucking rock.

Hahaha didnt know a RAPIST could be demisexual. You fucking cuck come after me. I bet you cant make them cum either.

Ignore this lmao

I get this.. terrible aniexy when I try to go to bed at night. I take my aniexty medicine and it doesn't help. I've been asleep each time someone in my life died.

The next door people have three outside cats now. I almost hit one of them 3xs this morning bc he would keep running in front of my car. I dont even know how to approach this

Happy wrath month

⋆✴︎˚｡⋆pride⋆✴︎｡˚⋆

Even the bro code says dont support rapists, so why are you? Believe the victims. Soon, my skin will be skin you've never touched. 💗

I think id like to be a GOH at least once but I dont think it'll happen.

I think im starting to slip again. The music is back.

However, I will say eating pretzels on the ground is the best thing thats happened this week.

I feel like all i am is bottles of medications. This to balance that. That to offset this. When does it stop. Will it stop?

I urge to make a deer.

*Cackling*