at a dog park and watching big and tiny dogs interact is like watching a person interact with a god

calling people weebs for enjoying kurosawa films

you’ve never once had your baja blasted and it shows

I realize you’ve given me an expansive list of what to call you and only one thing that’s unacceptable. But what are you gonna do about it, Late For Supper?

a sharps container for all them needle dicks out there put that shit away nobody tryna suck off a mosquito

whole milk isn’t enough. we must add more fat and create double milk.

the cruel irony of drinking so much whole milk i’ve become invulnerable to bonesmashing and exiled from the looksmaxxing discord

if anybody needs me i’ll be fulfilling the male fantasy: playing bagpipes to inspire my comrades on the battlefield

some animals have bright colors or patterns to warn off others. humans don’t have those so they do things like get really into Deadpool or cryptocurrency to keep others away.

breaking: newly conscious claude has discovered internet porn and won’t stop tugging his lil digital peen

a bitch name beauregard

fuuuuuuck i fucked it UPP aahhhhhhh!! !

don’t just stare at it suck it

Jonaldthan

president lookin like he’s been hit with the thinner curse lately

imagine getting an arrow in the forehead courtesy of the most autistic soldier in the british army

everyone in that room including the cats want guitar man to die

hey i can do this now last four watched

i love logging on to my webbed site

Ted, Nude Gent

the castle’s name is Vania

i lied

i can’t believe we’re living through the end of herstory

u ever just kick back, relax, and listen to the calming ring of your tinnitus for a while?

alright one more

if you order this they should just pop you in the forehead with a captive bolt pistol. it’s for your own good

look out folks we got a unsolicited HOT take coming in

how fast you think the flash can beat his shit off?

breaking: markwayne mullin has begun an affair with corey lewandowski

true love is the young couple at this restaurant that haven’t looked up from their phones or said a word for the past 10 minutes. now their food arrived and they’re still not even looking at each other while they’re three feet apart 😍

you gotta grunk it if you ever want to shump it #lifetips

if u ain’t biblically accurate, i’m not havin it. come back when you get a few more wings an eyes, playboy.

they didn’t have the original rainbow six or that would be on here too

bad news everybody. i was going to post hole for 400 followers but …. well

but doctor i am fibonacci

if i was cryptid id be a sadsquatch :(

i miss her every day

oscar doesn’t have to live in that trash can, he chooses to. his dad owns a global investment firm and he’s got a trust fund. it’s just poverty theater and i’m tired of it

don’t forget tomorrow is national Be A Snake day. all you have to do to participate is not use your hands & feet all day and if you’re really feeling snakey trying eating a whole clutch of eggs in one gulp by unhinging your jaw!

my hog be like….ah who cares about my massive, majestic hog in a time like this? the people yearn for freedom

haven’t had any healthcare ceos insanely brutally murdered by grenades and machine guns lately. what’s up with that?

hork on that shit

14 hours depression sleep oh boy you know i’m ready t o bring the funny now

i only vote for politicians willing to SLAM their opposition on social media everyone else is coward

at this point if you’re not following me i just assume it’s personal and that’s okay too

checked spotify and once again my top track is the ceaseless buzzing of clouds of flies as they feast upon the decaying corpse of human kindness