BOG WITCH SUMMER https://jorts.horse/@thePlaceThatMakesYouTraitful/115365525818915736

bedtime is khamas

i like when the jorts mods like my posts bc that means im not fucking up the vibes

ok ok I take da medtimes (da meds I take at bedtime)

tummy can u fuckin dont

seemingly normal well adjusted software developers keep following me actually now that I typed that I'm not sure if those actually exist

when I go to natural history museums I always have a moment where I stand in front of the Very Big Taxidermied Bear Standing Upright and I scream a little and then I look at the tag saying it was donated to the museum in like 1800 something and I am strangely comforted to know that like 200 […]

I need to get another switchbot so I don't have to get up to turn off The Big Light

@Nkki now that you're here you're gonna get to see what I'm like when I'm not constantly politics posting spoiler: absolute nonsense. unhinged garbage nonsense

@Nkki @SiameseSoprano when you wake up nikki's here

@Nkki YOU MADE ITTTT

oh dang I have bloodwork at 10am this is fine just need to remember To Not Snack :pensive_butt:

das NOT WHAT I SAID :omega_laugh: https://darkestalleygang.lol/@zeph/115364931236504087

The wizard sleeps soundly. Outside, an owl calls out.

determined to acquire more British followers so I can complain about how much I want a strawberry cornetto and some quavers and a j2o and be Seen

anyone know how to connect this man to some BUGS https://fuckaas.space/@Sleepybonepile/115363482338169388

every daaaay is a winding roaaaad and I don't have my licenseeee

I know I should look in the hashtags of things I'm interested in but the problem is I don't fucking know what I'm interested in in a way that I want to encounter people who hashtag it other than fedifc for the football dweebs

real glad you can disable boosts from people lmao its a couple mfs on here actively deleting the vibes with their boosts like why did I just get flashbanged by something about being more christlike

STILL RISING?! https://mastodon.social/@levelbot/115364185948755684

I should have quiet posted those lmao that's gonna get my fuckin bridgy bsky account cooked

I have some new followers, and then there's the whole #fuckaas crew who have all recently joined. If this is your first Sunday on Mastodon, you're about to be clobbered by around 3000 messages tagged #monsterdon in the next hour. We're doing a group film watch (feel free to join in, see below) […]

the internet was not a mistake

@SiameseSoprano I learned what a shark is. it's a pointy mf that tells you facts https://mastodon.social/@aric/115364049171255661

@yaya https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34CZjsEI1yU You're welcome 😬

if you don't know what to get for dinner tonight it's PIZZA NIGHT we have DECIDED

he's a 10 but due to the exchange rate once you convert that to your local currency it's not actually worth all that much

okay so I have an ongoing playlist of songs that randomly get stuck in my head apropos of nothing, like it can't be a song I remember hearing recently or that I was directly reminded of, it has to just be beamed directly into my brain out of absolutely fucking […] [Original post on jorts.horse]

why the fuck did I randomly just get what does the fox say stuck in my head

finally went in and changed "soccer player" to "association football (soccer) player" on the Barbie's Careers wiki page :blobdab: I do need to do another sweep and see if there's any new ones out since my last round of edits but I still don't have internet here yet and doing that on my phone […]

fun fact about me: before football, my main Autism™©® was the "Barbie's Careers" Wikipedia page. give you one guess which color is me #lore

usually I say people come for the tits and stay for the wits but somehow miraculously ive mostly done it in reverse this time

OKAY IT ONLY JUST OCCURRED TO ME I CAN DO SPEECH TO TEXT FOR ALT TEXT

I found these pictures at completely different times in completely different places and I refuse to believe they don't form a perfect complete narrative

I literally only have one regret in life and it's that I saw a legit ghetto blaster at the thrift store for like $12 once, figured eh ill come back for it, and it was gone when I got back https://mastodon.social/@levelbot/115363635890464835

The wizard carefully packs his charms and potions into crates, wrapping them in cloth.

NEVERMIND IM GLAD I DIDNT TURN OFF NOTIFICATIONS W W W W W

another #claptoncfc convert ehehehehe https://jorts.horse/@plut0nian/115363482912545879

does anyone know what the fuck a shark is https://jorts.horse/@SiameseSoprano/115363435794699372

do you think they ever explored each other's voids https://fuckaas.space/@tribadist/115363259840014487

fuckkkkkkk they found me

no bud you're not supposed to follow me on bsky you're supposed to follow me on my long running truth social sock account where we can be best friends