Lancaster City v Ashton United First visit to the Giant Axe

Now we know why Paul Scholes didn’t speak during his playing career. What an arsehole.

8 points adrift and Burnley time wasting- deserve to go down

Who knew? Provide service to the striker and he’ll score. #mufc

Noticed last night that ref Taylor made visible signs he was counting every time Lammens took possession of the ball. Does he do this for all keepers or just ours?

How long before the Villa fans are booing Bruno for a penalty incident that no one was here to see?

UTFR for Christmas Villa v United Hoping for an early Christmas present

No joy in today’s ballots. Looks like I’ll have to get a dart board and start practicing…🎯 #mufc

9 minutes- they’re really making the Wolves fans suffer

Decent nights sleep on the cards tonight unlike after the Everton & West Ham games.

Come on United. Wolves are doing their best to help us win!

Are we about to witness a new low? Letting this shower of shit back into the game unforgivable. Need a big second half now.

Wolves giving the ball away for fun so we decide to be equally generous. Absolute cack.

51 minutes after the draw and the email arrives telling us payment will be processed tomorrow. Are we really so hard up?

Whatever happened to the rule about surrounding the referee or does it not apply to some clubs? #leeche

Think Anthony Taylor is in cahoots with Paqueta. Can’t see Arsenal v Chelsea ending 11 a side with 3 yellows inside the first 12 minutes.

What I’d give for a set of clippers to attack Cucarella’s bonce.

That’s for all the doubters- me included!

It’s like playing with 10 men with Zirkzee on the pitch. He offers nothing.

What the fuck was that Leny?

Got that same gut ache I had immediately after the Brentford game. Can’t see anything beyond a defeat today. It’s the hope that kills!

By my reckoning, if I get there at 7.00pm on Saturday I’ll be there 2 days before kick off. Expecting a big crowd are they?

Och aye the noo!

Need the scousers to come out fighting. A couple of red cards & season ending injuries for both sides would do nicely.

United hit a bit of form so we get a #motd hatchet job on Sesko. Twats.

Liverpool win a game so guaranteed they are first on MOTD. The trouser creaming is back on.

So much going on in this photo. My personal favourites...

Good move getting the two carded players off

Get Casemiro off now before Oliver sends him off

Amad’s next challenge and Oliver will have his card out again

No doubt Sky will be observing the minutes silence while their ‘anthem’ is played…

Out of patience. That was awful.

Back at OT tonight for the U21s 2-1 win v Athletic Bilbao

This ain’t a commentary, it’s a never ending stream of stats. For fucks sake Fletcher, shut up!

18 September and Christmas mince pies are on sale at Tesco. Not got a good date on them mind…

Neville & Dreary purring over City is sickening. Thought they were average & we were just shite.

Yet more crap defending has let us down again

Piss off Neville!

Tuesday night action at Hurst Cross Ashton United v Bamber Bridge

Is it time Nigel Farage was banned from the BBC? Like if it is. RT if it should be today.

Sky Sports News already talking down Sesko and United. Twats.

Mainoo on

“Empty your pockets!” Why the heavy handed search at Old Trafford when the queues a mile long? Ridiculous!

Ready for off. Surely luck will change today?

Today’s the day. A win and the noise dissipates. Anything else is not worth considering. Oh, and news of a decent keeper coming in would improve my mood. Thanks!

What’s the latest we can register a keeper for Saturday’s game? Is it worth my while getting up in the loft and retrieving my gloves from 40 years ago? Only ever played at Sunday league level but I swear I’m still better now than that fraud.

How Amorim has even considered starting the season with either of those two dopey bleeders between the sticks must surely raise questions over his own competence?

No midweek games on the horizon for some time. Standby for Jim to announce a price increase.

That was Grim for sure.