nordstrom "nosferatu" nostradamus
@nordstrom.bsky.social
📤 395
📥 98
📝 2389
dog lover but not in a weird way
reposted by
nordstrom "nosferatu" nostradamus
Quest 64 Official
about 8 hours ago
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been re-watching scrubs i think my favorite part is the beginning of each episode where jd sings the intro song
about 9 hours ago
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tides of the planet of the apes: primates of the caribbean
1 day ago
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i don't know who needs to hear this but there's no michael
1 day ago
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reposted by
nordstrom "nosferatu" nostradamus
budum
10 days ago
Got my dad’s ass with the Michael prank 😂🤦
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i just entered my third trimester of college
1 day ago
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guys i just realized something. this goes way deeper than anyone could have ever thought
1 day ago
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pulling out my compass at the local costco as a wayfinding technique
1 day ago
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still pissed about that time when i died and they put the ifunny watermark on my obituary photo
1 day ago
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had exactly enough money to get two shoes from the shoe dispenser. the second one got stuck though. can't do much with one shoe. i guess you could say i'm... waiting for the remaining shoe to fall down
1 day ago
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someone, please. rearrange me.
1 day ago
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having some braised knife tips for dinner later. nice applesauce too.
4 days ago
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i wouldn't lie to you guys about anything or make shit up ever
4 days ago
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wheeling a giant cart of lettuce and a big trident up to the hill giant got me feeling like the bugs in A Bugs Life no lie
4 days ago
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they're granting me special privileges tomorrow
4 days ago
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reposted by
nordstrom "nosferatu" nostradamus
weeder
5 days ago
Invented a new cable, what's a cool ass name, how about ░e░t░h░e░r░n░e░t░
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break me in half
6 days ago
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if you ever see this man, do not harm him. and yes i am very familiar with the rule of thirds
8 days ago
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my foes might tell you i need to put all my ducks in a row. now listen, i'm going to put my ducks wherever i damn well please
8 days ago
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she's lying in wait for me? i don't know what that means but i can't wait to find out 🤤
10 days ago
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just realized, if jesus was "born" twice, and his parents aren't together, that means... 4 birthdays? that slick mother fucker
10 days ago
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the boys are back in town, but every time he says it he's a little less enthusiastic about the whole thing
10 days ago
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i'm going to need the emoji kitchen to get to work on this guy
11 days ago
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thinking about releasing my inner voice later. probably won't though
11 days ago
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don't give me the soup of the day. give me the soup of a lifetime
11 days ago
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babe what's wrong, you've hardly touched your no-bake worms in dirt pie?
11 days ago
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reposted by
nordstrom "nosferatu" nostradamus
m
11 days ago
hearing noises while home alone 💓😍🥰✨🎊💕💋💘🥳❤️🩹🫦💦💞🩵💝
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i came up with a guy who is cool and chill and gets along with everyone
11 days ago
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captain: i'm afraid we're sinking. there's enough lifeboats for everyone aboard. as for me, i'll be going down with the ship. me: me too i'm also going down with the ship
11 days ago
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pulling up to monster jam in my monster sedan. it gets decent gas mileage
11 days ago
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happy friday, here's some criminally underrated hardcore
loading . . .
Boudicca - Ellen
YouTube video by BOUDICCA
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=amnfMi_d7E4
11 days ago
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just read some of the most depraved shit you couldn't even imagine in the library of babel
12 days ago
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hot ones, but it's you and me and we each drink four beers
12 days ago
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yeah so i'm a people person, by definition
12 days ago
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for my next trick watch my slow collapse
13 days ago
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crying my eyes out signing legal documents (living today like it's my last)
13 days ago
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going up to the moon to get some fresh air
13 days ago
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ask your doctor about men of pause. some secret society or something
13 days ago
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reposted by
nordstrom "nosferatu" nostradamus
Nurbsy
13 days ago
Flushable bath towels
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gross and repugnant people disgust me
13 days ago
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they're popping off right now in champagne chat
13 days ago
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you make 100% of the shits you take - dwayne "the rock" gretzky
13 days ago
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sky captain and the world of tom
13 days ago
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reposted by
nordstrom "nosferatu" nostradamus
i'm over the moon. you heard that right. i'm fuckin sick and tired of the moon.
over 2 years ago
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just promoted myself to the head of internal affairs from within
14 days ago
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there's nothing more prestigious than being a street magician
14 days ago
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drake bell wrote the song bodies by drowning pool
14 days ago
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been done. done bin. call it. study the beans.
14 days ago
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good morning, i've been up since 1990 and never went back to sleep
18 days ago
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hey i updated the font on your typewritter for you. hope you like wingdings
18 days ago
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