Hope everyone’s doing well I’m still round

Things have progressed since 2022 but I’m still an idiot so that’s remained consistent

Beach

Blah blah tits blah blah

#pixelart #artpost

Trying something a little different for the 3 times a year I go out to a party at a gay bar

Need any beach chairs carried? I can handle two - maybe three - of those at once. No big deal.

It was a titty kind of morning

Oh hey I never shared this pic here anyway bye!

Biiiiig stretch

The gym is done and I’ve flipped the lever that initiates the process by which the entire structure will now begin to sink into a hidden bog below 😈

Sunday cuddles?

Long story short, my ass has gotten fatter 🥹

Idk what this is but here it is

Hope everyone gets to eat an entire box of chocolates today (I’m not a gainer - my fat ass just loves chocolate 🥰)

It’s gotten to the point where I open one of these apps up and almost immediately see something I don’t like and therefore close it again. Maybe I’m just not a social media girlie anymore!

Who wants to watch The Menu with me?

Fuck do I enjoy cheese

Y’all really do love to vague-post on here, eh? So I’ll just say this bluntly - I think @jjskyhopper.bsky.social is a piece of shit 😘

You can kinda see my quads through my thigh fat now 😌

I truly cannot stand dudes who SCREAM at the top of their lungs at the end of a set at the gym. If you need to do all that to muster strength, please just lower your weight and shut up lol

Up early to get a massage then I’ll go to the gym and then maybe someone can give me another massage but from the inside 😃

Hope all you beautiful fuckasses have a great weekend! I did biceps today.

Idk how some gays have the mental fortitude to submit themselves to be RATED by gay instagram accounts lol

It’s my birthday so I’m gonna eat an entire sheet cake and nobody can stop me

Good lighting really is witchcraft

Haircut cured me (probably for sure yeah?)

PLEASE don’t put your bare ass on your board games 🥲

Opening this site at work and then getting mad when porn shows up is crazyyyyyyyyyyy 🤐

My smoke detector just scared the shit right out of my ass

It’s so pretty 🥹

Get all up in there

I’ll wear spooky shirts all goddamn year if I want

When you’re the funniest of all your friends and they start getting jealous

Good sexting is a dying artform. So many people are just trash at it lol

Was looking very scruffy this morning

I’m determined to organize my board games and NOT be a slut today

I seriously have like *the* best fucking people in my life

I could tie a knot in a cherry stem with my asshole

I quite enjoy being chunky and can’t believe I used to not. What a stupid piece of shit I was wow fucking idiot

Had Friendsgiving and it was really fucking good and made my BUTTHOLE PUCKER WITH LOVE

The tree is decorated and I managed to not burn my entire house down in the process

The turkey for tomorrow is now fully thawed but there’s a hole in the bag so turkey juice started pouring out and I didn’t have time to think so I began slurping it up and guzzling it down and I haven’t been able to stop oh god help me I’m drowning in turkey milk GUYS HELP

Some say I have a belly but I don’t really see it

Hosting Friendsgiving this weekend and the next two days are going to be so crazy but I’m really excited to have everyone together so I could annoy them all at once - it’s so convenient 🥹

HERE COMES A SPECIAL BOY ✍️

All of my friends are absolute fucking idiots. Every. Single. One. 😘

Cute finds in Palm Springs 🩳

Jersey Train, reskeet with a pic of you in a jersey The only pic of me flexing and it's to show off the "farmer's" tan 🙈

Yes, I'm bald now. 👨🏻‍🦲