Love when I take a screenshot of something on an app and the app immediately is like “SAVING THE POST I SEE??? YOU GONNA SEND IT TO SOMEONE??? YOU GONNA SEND IT TO ONE OF YOUR LITTLE FRIENDS??? HOW ABOUT YOU SEND IT TO ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IN *OUR* APP!! HERE, HERE’S YOUR EMPTY ASS INBOX!!! …bitch”

You say you can hit a blinker but can you USE your blinker???

Got bored yesterday. Watched the SpongeBob movie. This will likely happen again.

I either need to be caffeinated or sedated.

I truly don’t understand how people can be against gender affirming surgeries/healthcare in general. Have y’all seen a custom-made coochie before??? Shits beautiful. We’ve come so far scientifically/technologically and you guys DON’T wanna reap the benefits? Fuckin BORING!!!!!!

“It’s men’s mental health month too!” Ya know what would really help men’s mental health? Getting fucked in the ass. 🏳️‍🌈

One of my rules of life is that it’s okay to get fucked up on a Thursday. Take that shot, take that rip, hell yeah happy Thursday!

More men need to wear crop tops and get pegged

Chat I dropped that thun thun thun what do I do?

Gonna buy a Bible for the rolling paper. Probably cheaper.

Doing that grown up thing where I breathe too hard and pop a rib

At some point, I will need someone to grab me by the throat and dangle me over a bridge. Just to feel something.

what the FACK

Love triangles in media are only good if they •end in polyamory •end with the two people who were fighting over the same person getting together (note: this version only works if it’s gay) Sorry I don’t make the rules (I do actually)

People that hate shipping are BORING. You are BORING. You are a DRY NOODLE of a person.

People who tease a reveal for longer than 3 seconds in a video deserve to be publicly executed.

I think spiders deserve to get high.

FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN

At what point is your skeleton no longer yours?

Need someone to put me in a jar and shake it

I just want to sleep but the horrors persist (the horrors being my day job that i actually like)

Just finished arcane this week and ngl if my situationship neutered me without my consent, I’d leave him to become the fucking messiah too

“If there’s a screen, ao3 will be seen.” OKAY AND I HAVE YET TO SEE ANYONE PULL UP AO3 ON A VAPE SO WHAT NOW

I can hardly wait!

Mmmmm bones

Keep your head up king, your glass eye is falling out. 😉