IM SO BORED OF HEARING ABOUT AMERICA EVERY SIX SECONDS CAN YOU JUST FUCKEN BE NORMAL

fellas - stop taking your photos like this! (completely normal selfie) and start taking them like this! (completrely normal selfie except ive zoomed in x20 on my left ear)

i made myself laugh so hard thinking of the term 'jonkler horizon' (an event horizon where everyone becomes the joker) that i forgot the end of the skeet

me: no thats wrong i asked for a formula that sums all rows WITHOUT an x in the product description chat gpt: Great point! I've just nuked Australia.

make stranger things fortnite skins or i will SHIT in a post office

my retirement plan is to find 25 other elder millenials and do a human centipede

i am an alpha male. the first version of male realeased. absolutely garbage. i dont function

grwm to do a regime change

i started giving thoughts and prayers in 2006 and no one ever told me to stop

if any of you think that elon musk is going to help make xai safe for making horny images well boy howdy this is a guy whose search history would definitely put that theory to the test

happy new years my fitbit just told me its about time to get ready for bed

its nye and i forgot to book tickets to a foam party again

what idiot called him captain planet and not earthmaster

its my first day as PM and i am announcing the 'octuple lock' pension. it goes up every 8 seconds for no reason

fellas i looksmaxxed too hard and now my face is just a point of light

alexa can a dog have a six-pack

what if chernobyl just did that

so youre telling me a dog ate this dog

they should do a pornhub wrapped

its my first day at thw DWP and ive added a line to everyone in the uk's payslip that says 'free stuff for immigrants'

INVITED TO ANOTHER EYES WIDE SHUT PARTY AND I FORGOT TO BRING MY DICK WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME

fellas , its time to engage.......... Piss Protocol

STATE OF THE UK RIGHT NOW: 2% tax on the ultra-rich? woah steady on trotsky taking the valuables from asylum seekers? can we also take their teeth

THEY MADE ZELDA A GIRL!!!!!!!!!! WOKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

emailing [email protected] to see if epstein wants to become one of my scentsy sellers

opening a new epstein email every morning like its an advent calendar

going to watch odyssey on a gameboy colour just to upset nolan

door dash? buddy i want a hamburger not a door

i would rather have my skin removed with a flensing knife than watch this video

somehow bond returned

if 9/11 happened now youtube would just be streamer reaction videos of it

everyone always saying 'blue wave' no one ever saying 'bluekakke'

[temping at the thaumaturgical office] bro what category should i file 'an image of selune appeared on my toast' under

ITS SATURDAY NIGHT FELLAS AND YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS THATS RIGHT ITS TIME TO WATCH 6 HOURS OF DOGS REALISING THEYRE SAFE VIDEOS ON YOUTUBE

manic pixie ai girl

youtube: emiru reacts to asmongolds react to xqc's reaction to mixwzy's reaction WATCH NOW me: [bites down on capsule]

if youre just joining us, the guiding hand of the free market seems to be forming a fist and oh ohhh no

me, approaching a woman at the bar, ready to break out the opener ive been workshopping for months: hi. can your dad swim

All The MILFs Are Younger Than Me, in this essay i will break down t

me, explaining boomers to my gen alpha nephew #relatable #meme

babe check this out [i hit play and a 400 db shepard tone obliterates her instantly]

me, first shift in starfleet, immediately to the first replicator i can find: seventeen bottles of hoisin sauce, hot

hitting my newborn with his daily '1 hour listening to the hereditary OST'

my job thinks it can do phishing training on me. jokes on them i dont read any emails

fellas i have once agaiun woken up in Cube

imagine if don draper had known about looksmaxxing

all children should be called gary

executing a perfect dodge roll on my student loans and skipping any repayment completely