who? i'll get 'em.

lemme give you a hand up, miss maclean. she's a lot sweet from up top.

howdy.

quit that.

she's dividin' now? aw heck.

a fast lad like you?

( firing while he talks. ) didn't take you f' a believer, ranger.

where is he? i'll finish him myself.

yee-haw.

soft? naw, i'm jus' old. maybe y' old man can tell y' all about that.

y'know y' get *more* beautiful when y' start talkin' all like that?

yeah? so, uh, what? y' wanna . . . stay here?

oye, we might getcha back home t'morrow too!

nobody tells me nothin' no more. i dunno 'bout this one, kim-girl. i don't think it's gon' be that easy.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz . . . . . . .

*tomorrow*? uh, guess so, yes ma'am.

d'aww, shucks.

so y' lookin' at fish history?

how's somethin' like a pun? it is or it ain't.

eh?

what's internet

( wincing. ) i'm old, not deaf. how, uh, how can i help . . . ?

one interestin' lady . . .

sure can!

'course you gotta have the boots t' back it up. i ain't goin' nowhere without my boots on, see? y' only as good as y' hat an' boots. folk forget that.

hmmm. good plan. a fine hat's mighty important f' y' character.

ain't that . . . *rain*?

what is . . . vape?

i dunno, kim-girl. all i know is, wherever you go, i'm goin'. so's if y' goin' home t' y' magic fantasy world, i'm comin' with, no matter what.

yes ma'am. and y' one o' us now, whether y' like it or not.

all o' us is.

don't i know it. oye, if i could just think of an animal that barks 'afore it bites, hmm . . .

y' sure bark a lot.

speaking o' wild dogs in my love life . . .

i think your dog just bit my dog or somethin'?

yes ma'am.

ain't you s'posed t' be neighin'?

yes ma'am. an' who 're we t' tell her no? seems like a fine idea.

aw, well, it ain't the future y' oughta be lookin' at. 's the past, see? 'cos things go 'round 'n' 'round in some great big circle. same shit, diff'ren' day. maybe the universe's tellin' you it wants things a certain way. i dunno. i jus' follow the footsteps in the sand 'n' ride a damn fine horse.

. . . yup, sounds 'bout right. maybe it's a sign.

p'haps i can be of service in this here debate.

HOWDY. . . . say, pardner, y'aint seen my trusty canteen 'round here, have y'?

'scuse me. i'm lookin' f' a . . . uh, alice terigo? got a parcel for her. @allthewrongpieces.bsky.social

yeah, i betcha are. you're a bright one. south? ( a sigh. he stretches, languid, like a cat. he considers what to say to her. ) . . . eh, let's just say not much y' don't got here. jus' less water, i guess.

yup. now normally y'd get y' mamá y' papá t' kiss it better, but i think you're plenty strong enough on y' own.

doc arlo's ready f' his next patient . . .

now rub it in.

attagirl. now did you wash *'hind the ears*, too? gotta get all 'em nooks 'n' crannies, y'know. aw, me? not much. smokin' 'n' snorin' mostly. got me a couple caps followin' someone down south. aw, you don't wanna hear 'bout an ol' fart's day though. tell me 'bout yours.