My mama talking about "The Raiders can come back from this" Not with 9 points at half time! And they all came from the kicker???

Your last saved meme is your moral philosophy

Butterfingers would be on the bench for the rest of the game fucking with me 😂

Spain said "You wanna play here? Watch this." I love it

My Demon on #Netflix has me kicking my feet omg

When I put all my bills on payment arrangements and buy a concert ticket

My will to live 😑

Gotta be higher than giraffe pussy to think I'll pay all of that and still need to look for dental and vision plans.

$560 a month for healthcare, with a $15,000 deductible?!? They're smoking crack if they think I'm going to pay THAT much a month and pay THAT much out of pocket.

I looked up and see his ugly ass in the booth with a mic

The best $50 I ever spent I s2g 😩

You know whaaaaaaat, Washington is pissing me off and then I see that fucking gizzard neck diaper baby enjoying himself and I....

YES CHICAGO, YESSSSSS

Chicago is pissing me off a touch. Imma need them to NOT let NY win.

I read 2-3 books a week and I completely forgot I was irritated about this. DNF but I'm about to, gotta see how this shit ends

You know what chaps my hide? Getting an email from a BILLION dollar company asking me to donate money. "Hello poor person, help your fellow poors." 😑 Bitch gtfo my face

The 9 year old me is SO excited to see Jesse McCartney tonight 😭

I want to start writing emails in caveman, cause using all these important words and nobody reads is killing me.

GTA 6 is never coming out 😂

Start. The. Rapture. 😒

You know those people who didn't get into a specific club one time so they trash talk that specific club every chance they get?

CALIFORNIA. NEW YORK. VIRGINIA. NEW JERSEY. Y'ALL DID IT BABY!

I need a trainer, I go to the gym and play with the weights 😭

If you've never seen Finley, pls pls watch it on YT. I've been crying laughing for the last 10 minutes 😭

This man leaving pearls on her nightstand like it isn't creepy AF that he's breaking & entering and stalking 😑 I need to finish this book to save my sanity, but wtf Bennett? #BookSky

Whenever shit starts going south I find everything funny - I'm not going to be in crisis and sad, bih, we gotta laugh about it before I jump out of a window fr

Captain Morgan 🤢 I can smell it in any mixer and immediately no

I made soup and put hell in it, but mama didn't raise a quitter. I'm sweating lawd

Nothing worse than an attractive face and air between their ears. Just walking around dumb as shit 😩

.... Honestly who asked you

Yo today has been 18 hours long already and it's only 2:30 😑 RELEASE ME

What movie had you clutching your head like this the next day?

Who's Grace? We don't know her

I gotta watch this football game today. If you fuck with me G.O.D you'll make sure Dallas loses this game.

What if tomorrow is the day that the fucking aliens came and invaded our nation? Like, would we even be able to fuck with their shit? Like, do we have the type of weaponry to fuck with their ships?

Stop, stop, stop. Married man courts secretary, gets secretary pregnant and swears he'll leave his wife and she BELIEVES HIM 🤦🏾‍♀️ s2g sometimes fight club is necessary because WHYYYYY would you do that

All my potential wives have found an actual wife and left my ass out in the cold 😑

OH YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT MOTHERRRRRRRRS

Ri-damn-diculous! Just damn dumb.

28-0 in the first half. Josh Harris, fire somebody. Anybody. Ffs 🤦🏾‍♀️

Fucking up, per usual 😑 I love them but damn damn damn

He DROPPED THE FUCKING BALL

Alright, almost time Washington to show their asses. I am not enthusiastic at all.

Went to 3 stores to find one craft beer and came home with everything but what I wanted to spend $40 on 😩 why does Weldwerks hate meeeee