Topping men and leaving them emasculated And by that I mean: Raising my umbrella above theirs as they walk past

Who could have known it would go like this?

Sorry to anyone who is seeing me argue with “4chan leftists are literal Hitler” dude I need a distraction today and he seems like he wants to be one

“Come to bed honey, you need to sleep” “Just one second” “No more seconds. You are arguing with neo-Mattachine gays about respectability politics in the comments of PinkNews posts. It’s time to put the phone down.”

Had to tell the new guy that his cyberpunk desktop background had a naked woman Goon on your own time, bro

Everything else aside, the combative nature of these posts is an energy I can appreciate I need to start more posts with: “listen up, fuckheads”

“Turns out Tony Hawk is not in the Epstein files” is my sleeper agent activation phrase

The fact that the company behind Hims and Hers hasn’t made a competitor to Plume or Folx called Thems shows that enbys haven’t penetrated the corporate world yet

Congrats to this winter storm, Fern, for being the first out non-binary weather event.

words cant transition without permission from a dictionary

Drawing lines in the sandbox based on where our parents parked and then insulting each other over it

The waiting room for Planned Parenthood on hormone days is the non-binary Met Gala

I wish weed wasn’t named after food now I miss when strains used to have crazy out there names, like Jack Herer

Asking the tattoo artist doing my fake freckles to do a couple malignant melanomas to “get one over” on my dermatologist.

Chewing on unground peppercorns just to feel something

Asking the tattoo artist doing my fake freckles to do a couple malignant melanomas to “get one over” on my dermatologist.

Every trans novel begins like: I (trans woman, duh) woke up in my Brooklyn apartment I share with a roommate we won’t develop Snorted ketamine Casually shit on trans men (figuratively/literally) Go to a job I hate (deadnamed)

“Ice cold fatties!” I shout out The line continues past me Again, I yell “ice cold fatties!” The funeral crowd seems unusually uninterested in my whippets

I prefer my current multiply marginalized trans women to be how they used to be Completely truthful like Sylvia Rivera Absolutely reliable with details like Martha P. Johnson

I don’t know who needs to hear this but You don’t have to keep subjecting yourself to Geese. It’s fine that you don’t like them. I know your friends are acting like a guy named Cameron is god’s gift to music but youre confusing your Spotify algorithm by playing the same 30 seconds of their top song

“Bootlicking furry” is always the funniest dichotomy to me

I think phones are disgusting As in, I regularly clean mine and still think it’s gross Please don’t try to hand me your phone, I won’t take it.

I ate my sister’s first pair of jelly shoes

I thought that TBoy Wrestling was a way to do an event that brought out the community for a night of fun and madness, like pro wrestling Instead it was a way to exploit people while providing little to no compensation and not addressing medical needs, like pro wrestling

We were about a month from launch but apparently I need to change the name of my company The elevator pitch was “do to a cuck chair what was done to gamer chairs”

lol we are getting stereotypical token characters again? We are so back, baby! The market has deemed us profitable!

Genuinely got to get out of my old habit of taking the blame for things that go wrong at work I’m gonna be blamed, I don’t need to preempt it by trying to jump on any grenades

Transition would seem so much more magical if it was more accessible The fact that certain aspects are behind a paywall that require me to behave like a dragon amassing a hoard takes some shine off of what is otherwise very spiritual to me

The constant online argument between: “This wouldn’t happen if people shot back” and “Shooting back is pointless, we are inherently outgunned” Has the same energy as: “My dad can beat up your dad” and “Nuh uh!”

Being trans in Brooklyn often feels like being just another brick in a brownstone.

Comparing “shoe sizes” in the Oval Office like LBJ is still alive

“Protect the dolls” but with more the energy of Sonny from Dog Day Afternoon and less Lou Reed

> see a job posting from a trans advocacy group > ask if job is going to be trans led or if it’s headed by cis people > recruiter doesn’t understand > i pull out an illustrated diagram explaining what is community-led governance > she laughs and says "it's a good job" > apply for job > its cis led

If I ever die prematurely, I will haunt anyone who posts my eulogy on Reddit

I love being on The Internet. Love contextual evisceration, love that everything is sarcasm until it’s not, and I love judging others by their actions and yourself by your intentions. I love that no one on here exists after we press the lock button and the screen goes black.

Haven’t done one of these in a while

If the rumors and emails are true, I’ve missed my shot at being the first confirmed President Cocksucker

I feel for people who can’t get Harry Potter out of their consumption because it was part of their childhood I remember being a kid and running home from school after discussing the new book all day. Putting on either a downloaded IT Crowd or a re-run of Chappelle’s Show, like the one with Kanye

Explore the world of medieval travel with Going Places: Travel in the Middle Ages, on view at the Getty Center through November 30, 2025. 🚣‍♂️ gty.art/going_places 📖 Alexander the Great in the Air (detail) from Weltchronik, about 1400–10, German. Getty Museum. Ms. 33 (88.MP.70), fol. 220v

It sucks that Satan is so cool yet both the Satanic Temple and the Church of Satan are so brutally lame Can we get some rebranding for my lord and savior out here?

So Bluesky seems to be trying to curb arguments on here by auto-muting replies when people are going back and forth to stop them from going back and forth. Really not a fan. If I want to engage in the self-harm that is reading replies to my posts, let me

In Cher’s 1998 hit single “Believe”, who is the pronoun “you” for, Cher or a second person? She says “you keep pushing me” and “there's no talking to you” but she also sings “Do you believe in life after love? I can feel something inside me saying ‘I really don't think you're strong enough, no’”

One of my favorite parts of being trans in queer spaces is having to have at least a masters in gender studies to talk about my own personal terminology and needs

What’s Riley Gaines even still going for? You won, you’re the only person who won 5th in that race. You wiped Lia Thomas’ records. You are the establishment and have all the power, what are you advocating for?

Shout out to baby-of-the-family-s for never having to be responsible for anything

Oh dang, Lily Allen is going full Lemonade on the new album. Good for her

If “made a permanent change to your body” is not a disqualification for a political career, why don’t we have more trans representation?

Things are rarely black and white, they are heather gray