“Me when hanging out with that one friend makes me realize the fourth wall is an illusion made to prevent me from bombing New York City.”

Just by living, people hurt others without even realizing it. So long as humanity exists, hate will also exist. There is no peace in this cursed world. War is just a crime paid for by the pain of the defeated.

“…I will kill for Sharena.” She begins to hover over like a cartoon pie was set next to the meat.

“…You have grilled meats?” Her inner food snob is coming out in full force

Oh hey why is Snag turning into hands- “ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA!”

“…I do not ‘dap up’ cult leaders I also don’t ‘dap up’ people that try to pry into my romantic life.”

“I AINT FUCKING ANY OF YOU LOSERS WITHOUT CHEMISTRY! YOU HEAR ME! I AM BISEXUAL BUT I AN NOT A DESPERATE PERSON!”

“EWWW, NO! Fuck no! Blegh!”

“How fucked is your life that you have to ask that question?”

🐍”Oh yeah, that.” She pulls out a bag and hands it off. It smells like fish and is covered in blood 🐍”She just set up a wall of corpses to block them out. They’ll be safe and so will adventurers unless they are illiterate.”

🐍”…Psychic Yuri Blast.” Cue Sol getting flashbanged by every sexual moment Ren has ever gone through, from the normal to the weird nonsense Sobek’s into 🐍”I’m a fertility goddess too, I just don’t make it my entire personality.”

🐍”I can be silly when I want to dammit.”

🐍”I once met a snake that could only suck its own dick Call that Oralboros.”

“Oh hey I got a motion sensor on one of my New York drop spots. …what do you mean they took the building?”

“NOBODYS GONNA MAKE FUN OF MY GENERIC LITTLE KNIGHT GUY COME ON KIRAN, WE ARE GOING TO GO ON AN ADVENTURE!”

“I’m not gonna do any siren nonsense I’m gonna go play Pokemon with my sister.” She’s aiming for the spot Ren hit now.

Cue Ren LAUNCHING forward and swinging the pogo stick into her shin 🐍”Shit talk Sobek all you want, but Serket’s been doing good!” “Yeah!…wait no, don’t shit talk me! What do you even need me to do anyway?!”

“YOU ARENT MY BOSS!” Ren is doing pogo stick tricks in the background, just getting fast off them

Immediately spraying her with a fire hose “I GOT HOME FROM VACATION MAN, FUCK OFF!”

An accurate visual of the next time Lep opens a door anywhere It doesn’t matter what size the door is. He’s getting hit

She’s asleep in a kiddie pool, face down in the water Somehow her snoring is super clear through the water

"I continue to offer cookies."

“BECAUSE MY BITCH ASS LANDLORD WILL GET ME IF I DO!” SHES SCREAMING FOR HELP NOW!

“GOOD RAT! GOOD RAT NOW GET AWAY FROM ME FOR MY OWN SAFETY!” It’s impressive how far she’s been able to run at least

“SHES GONNA MAKE ME GO BACK TO FIRE EMBLEM LAND AGAIN I FUCKING HATE THAT PLACE! I GOTTA BE DEPOWERED! GET THAT ADORABLE CRITTER AWAY FROM ME NOW!”

“AAAAAAAH AAAAAAAH THE ICE WITCH COMETH TO KICK MY ASS WITH MORE OF THOSE FURRY FUCKS!” She’s running away screaming.

“Tell me who it is then, so I can show them some mob justice.” That doesn’t count if it’s just a ton of crocodiles swarming a guy, ya know-

She stares down the stranger with a second before forming a baseball bat. “Ten.”

“Melted water bottles leave microplastic in the water The melted water turns into clouds The clouds rain in my river.” I think she’s missing a few steps…

“So that’s the mortal that’s been putting melted plastic in my river…”

“I am not calling you the same thing as Saint Valentine himself. You are now Val.”

“Thank you blue…person?” She’s genuinely unsure of the species in front of her, so there’s a shot in the dark.

“Did I hear ‘Torment Nexus needs to be invented for cult leaders?’”

“Oh man that burger was great…” She looks like she’s going to pass out.

“A national Hero.”

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY AND ITS ON COLOSSAL DREADMAW DAY!”

“I was told by Thoth to let people look at potential other realities or I would eat McDonald’s for a week So please use Snag.”

“I was told by Thoth to let people look at potential other realities or I would eat McDonald’s for a week So please use Snag.”

ill be real ive been grapling with visions of the great serpent recently

“…Damn, figured that would dilute the ink and make you look less like that guy from Danganronpa. …I’m just…gonna go. Stop with the cult though, genuinely.”

“…Wait a minute-“ She pulls out a few isopropyl alcohol pads from her pocket and chucks their contents forward, half expecting it to work like holy water.

Oh he should not have said that “Immortal doesn’t mean painless.” The fishing rod proceeds to fire actual shotgun shells, anomalously ejecting them through it’s case “And just because you have a creator doesn’t mean he can’t be a dick. Mine is for sure.”

“Oh I’m not doing this as a god anymore I’m doing this as an individual.” One of her shoulder pads morphs into this thing, and she arms it like a shotgun “Now stop with the cult please.”

“…Ok, now you are just pissing me the fuck off, and I don’t even require much from my worshippers A fucking bowling alley? Keep that shitty Jonestown stuff away from my pantheon.” YOU EAT PEOPLE!

“OH COOL, SO LETS DO THE SEPERATION OF CHURCH AND STATE TOGETHER THEN. FIRST YOU PART THE SEAS-“ OH GOD THERES A TSUNAMI FORMING BEHIND HER!

“…𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐃𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐋𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐍𝐮𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝟏.”