Undertone caused a couple to break up at my theater last night. Which, I'm guessing there was hidden noise of trouble in that relationship in the first place. And, it didn't help that the guy threw up all over our bathroom (pre-break-up)

Today, we are 71 days into 2026. I've biked 200 miles (2.82 per day) I've walked 800 miles (11.27 per day) Oh... my

So, Kevin, the #SlayTheSpire2 Early Access came out last week... how's life? Me: Well............

Was just reserving an AirBnB. It gave me the option to split the payments to today and a later date. Only after a couple more steps did I see that the "later date" was literally tomorrow. I mean, shrug, but... weird

This could be an evergreen skeet from after "Shock and Awe"

Only Stallone can save us now... #DaylightSavingsTime

My dog playing tetherball with himself

Goofus runs an Ice Dam Removal Service. Gallant runs an Ice Darn Removal Service.

I know this is Spring Training... but... wut... Mariners?

Me: Alexa play But Wait There's More by Ben Folds. Alexa: Playing This is Jake Paul. Me: FUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKK YOUUUUUUUU

Just tried to name an author at random and the first one I came up with was Immanual Kant Which, might say something about me? I've never read him

When Conan hosts the Oscars, I would definitely like to see a "Jacob Elordi Wastes a Minute of Our Time" bit... @brianstack153.bsky.social

At one point in the @doughboys.bsky.social Seattle show where Mitch made a joke about taking tequila shots from a @tacotimenw.bsky.social hot sauce container. I could see the backstage stairs to the green room. Immediately after that, I see Amelia walk up the stairs and come down with the tequila

"Amelia got a happy meal because she's a child" @doughboys.bsky.social

I'm gonna be uncomfortably close to @doughboys.bsky.social

My boy is a teenager! Happy birthday Guffman!!

Insert IanMalcolmScientists.gif

I had just accepted this at face value and didn't dive any deeper!

A White House staffer is running an anonymous pro-MAGA X account with nearly 300,000 followers. The account, JohnnyMAGA, has never disclosed formal ties, blurring the lines of official WH messaging and organic digital support. www.wired.com/story/a-whit...

Rock the Kazbar, rock the Kazbar!

(Me, starting Scream 2) I haven't seen this since it was in the theater... don't even remember who the killers were! (Timothy Olymphant comes onscreen) oh yeah.

Has anyone related to Henry Winkler's character ever appeared in another Scream movie? If not... that's gonna be the Scream 7 villain

(Brain melts)

This is giving me confusion.

The @tacobell.bsky.social Cheesy Fiesta Bouquet I made for my GF a couple years ago will always be an all-timer. #ValentinesDay

Wow! I just saw Super Bowl MVP Kenneth Walker!!! #SuperBowlParade

Is this Halftime Show a subtle way of announcing Bullet Train 2?

Someone watched Look Who's Talking Now and said "... I can make that a Super Bowl Ad!!!"

I am SHOCKED at how busy a Costco in the Seattle suburbs is on the day before the Seahawks play in the Super Bowl!

In Luc Besson's Dracula, there's a Special Thanks for Luc Besson

Don't wanna brag, but I might get some CarShield discounts!

The Special Thanks section for the new Luc Besson Dracula movie thanks Luc Besson

A mom in the Costco parking lot: No! You're not old enough to play the horsey game! 5 year-old-kid: YES I AM! Mom: No, you cannot play Red Dead! Kid: YES I CAN (lays on ground of parking lot and starts hitting his hands against the pavement)

A reminder that the Groundhog seeing its shadow means 6 more weeks of winter. But "6 more weeks of winter" means nothing. Six weeks from today would be mid-March. Yay, early Spring! Six weeks from March 20 would be early May. Insane late Spring! #GroundhogDay

I probably shouldn't open a phishing attempt from a convicted felon...

Me, reading Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe: Turkish Delight must be amazing! Me, 20 years later, in a World Market: The fuck is this shit?

I only walked 11 miles today, so that's really gonna torch my average for January :/

#Melania spoiler

There's a scene in the Amazon-financed #Melania where they talk about how Amazon got involved with the movie. So, this is deep

"During my first term in office I redesigned the Rose Garden and the White House bowling alley" - #Melania. Am I remembering wrong, but didn't she destroy the Rose Garden during her first term?

Woke road sign.

It's called #Pratting it's where you sit watching Mercy on a screen for 85 minutes. Not moving at all. AND THEN YOU MOVE TOO MUCH!!!!

This might be too much of a #HOTTAKE, but generative AI should ONLY be used to see what you'd look like with #FrostedTips

youtu.be/O9tS_nGC46M #TheBoneTemple

It seems like he wouldn't need to invoke the Insurrection Act to get ICE and its violent criminals out of the state, but what do I know??

POLL: If your name was "Manos," would you LOVE it... or HATE it if people gave you the nickname of "Hands of Fate"

I had the 9th most downloaded QBASIC game on AOL