SHE’s IN LOVE!!!!! THE LYRICS ARE FLUFFY!!!! SHE HAS LOVE POO POO BRAIN AND I LOVE THAT SHE GETS TO HAVE PUDDING THOUGHTS AND I KIND OF FUCK WID IT

call me crazy i am being indoctrinated into the new t swift album i can’t stop its catchy i thought it wasn’t for me but i don’t know shit about fart

breathed wrong and pulled every muscle in my back

did a guy name it microsoft

this tastes like well-seasoned bird food i’m in love

someone in this public restroom is listening to a high school band performance of ego by beyoncé

FUCKING LOVE PASTA IF YOU BELIEVE DIFFERENTLY THEN GO TO HELL

the bumpy road to convincing me to listen to this album…. i didn’t want to because the trav lyrics were like “okay everyone i’m getting a decent wienering what rhymes with wiener…”-but hearing clips of the original version of elizabeth taylor got me thinking bro….. got me thinking…

I don’t mind eating a little paper if a rogue piece of cheese accompanies it

denver proud #nokings

i saw you shuffle cards good and now i want you #weak?

the human spirit is lowkey unbreakable

The Elizabeth Taylor/Backstreet Boys remix on TikTok is consuming my life

“…your struggles aren't character flaws - they're natural responses to unmet needs.” this quote hitssss

friend: you better not be Something when i get there… me:

friend: you better not be The Creature when i get there… me:

to avoid being looked @ i’ve been dressing like somebody’s son is that a therapy topic

i already loved rachel highkey she ain’t gotta juice it like this 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

im almost 25 which is stupid and honestly gives me stomach cramps lets fucking go

dinner includes a Tylenol salad

HOW IS SHE NOT SO FUCKING FAMOUS???!!!!! THE EARLY 2000s GIRLY MOVIE VIBES ARE OUT OF THIS WORLD!!!!!!!!! UGH 😩😩😩😩😩🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷💞

she velma on my dinkley till i find my glasses

doing a back flip with drugs up my ass- call that a benson boof

i Have to stop free scrolling the internet is 90% mind numbing slop

idk why i’m just now seeing this because i am an active member of tornado tiktok but the EF5 TORNADO IN ND BACK IN JUNE??!??!?! WE HAVENT HAD AN EF5 IN TWELVE YEARS??!!! is this some climate shit because that thing was horrifyingly large. i think i read it was going max 200mph. holy shitttt 😔😔😔

if i became a chiropractor could i call my practice the crack house

so close 🤤

oh Fuck. is that literally me

why did these girl’s barber line their edges up

saw this @ an antique shop today. were kids just balder back then? like bald and scared? and the head/feet ratio is crazy work unless they were really built like that

okay shaving my head postponed

well hold on

nvm i looked in the mirror i don’t have the skull for it

can i shave my head

i still have our gang tattoo memorabilia

junk journaling videos you have bewitched me body and soul

sucking down a clonidine with a celsius for balance and harmony

bluesky is for people who were honorably discharged from twitter

it’s hard being so famous on this app.

just saw an engagement so beautiful on TikTok it made me want to change my hair and rearrange my room god i am not your toughest soldier! enough!

time to get crazy

god it’s me again

was thinking of ways to streamline cracking out, so yesterday i mixed c4 caffeine powder with unflavored gelatin and made caffeine jello

can you pickle cheese

do you think when babies cry after their dad shaves his beard that its an indicator the kid is on the spectrum or are all babies stunned by changes that disrupt their perception of comfort and familiarity

acquired habanero/tabasco pepper flavored pickles and consequences be damned i can’t stop my chest burns and my mouth is numb i need to be held back by the scruff like a dog

where do i get the I’m In Miami Bitch t-shirt

i’ve been lied to, schemed on, betrayed, punished for existing. nothing will ever stop katelyn and rachel from sending me jd vance disfigured baby stickers i go through hell texting them. fuck my jd vance life