On the first day of #TeacherAppreciationWeek Denver Public Schools gave to me an impasse on contract negotiations

Donations are being doubled today! Anything helps! www.donorschoose.org/project/flex...

#Purim is a holiday celebrating the triumph of a downtrodden people over an arrogant, genocidal moron and his incredibly stupid hat. Can’t think of any modern parallels though. Not a one.

Oh hey if you’re into supporting #teachers I have a thing Help me give my students flexible seating like wobble seats and comfy pillows so they have options when they are feeling wiggly but still ready to learn! www.donorschoose.org/project/flex...

Me: dang why does my house smell so good rn Also me: (is roasting carrots covered in #honey from the Bastard Hive)

Good lord is the Merge Mansion advertising blitz about to work on me

Buying a couch on the Laptop for it is a Large Purchase but the website is not loading well on Laptop. Dare make a Large Purchase on the Phone??

At a bar to watch the #debate because as my mom puts it I “like weird sports”

Mi nayme is Scratchy I playe bays boll I runne for catche And sumtymes foll For favrit playr I scourre the earf No mor an Nat But I lyks the Murph #ilikthebred #cats

Donations are being doubled today! Donate if you can and share to help a #teacher! (It me) www.donorschoose.org/project/vamo...

This is my first visit from a @skypeascientist.bsky.social scientist and we are having an amazing time! Thank you @sarahmackattack.bsky.social for this program!!

Tales from the teaching frontier Me: so what do we think “midstream” means? Do you know what a stream is? 3rd grader: yeah it’s when you do a YouTube or a blog Me: I Me: no but context clues, “I was midstream in the water and” Me: wait Me: so you’re not wrong Me: but we all need to go touch grass

Daisy, Daisy, give me an answer word I’m half crazy for chasing after bird I’m stylish in my vest It’s giving ek ek eks I’m looking sweet on the seat Of a bicycle built for Lime -excerpted from “Cat, Why Are You Up There, Now What Do We Do”

Chronicles of Occasionally Being a Cool Teacher: “A platypus project? …A PERRY the platypus project?!”

Snow day cuddles #cats

Sunday evening croissants

10 years ago on NYE I drunkenly called this guy I’d been on a few dates with to explain to me how to use the wine opener at the house I was dog sitting at and the confusion this man felt was palpable Reader, I married him

I just got my yearly cookie email from my designated Emergency Girl Scout and it is now a very good day

Teacher sentence I never thought I’d have to say in all earnestness to VERY UPSET children: Yes, dogs have knees

Also realizing that I am three days behind on my crabvent calendar from @sarahmackattack.bsky.social (I’m counting down to my birthday instead of Christmas lol) and now have THREE crab facts to learn tonight is very exciting

You know you’re at the right trivia night when the hosts pause to announce that not only is Henry Kissinger dead, and not only did the crowd cheer, but the hosts think they killed him with terrible trivia-related horror powers Comment for name of trivia if you want to attend :)

This dramatically lit #cat has a side quest for you. Press A to accept

Hi please look at my beautiful boys, a toasted marshmallow cat and his papa

Hey I need Jewsky to weigh in real quick: is stuffing a kugel

I got into podcasts really late and now I’m having all these feelings about The Magnus Archives and Welcome to Night Vale and nowhere to put them

Just finished my decennial reading of A Canticle for Leibowitz and it’s just a punch to the throat every single time

Cats are returning to the shark yurt - nature is healing

Excuse me why are my tote bags still sharp

Me, a teacher, on report card day, amongst the coffee shop people: I WANNA BE WHERE THE PEOPLE ARE I WANNA SEE WANNA SEE THEM DRINK COFFEE WORKING ALL DAY FROM — WHAT DO YOU CALL IT — HOME AND/OR THIS CAFE

Why are green expo markers 1000x worse than every other color

It’s dangerous to go alone! Take these beans!

“I ain’t employing no one without no name. Mr…?” “Mr. Sky?” “No one’s called Mr. Sky.” “Mr…Door?” “Could be. Could be Mr. Door.” Have a very Discworld Halloween y’all

ATTENTION

From the maker of Sharp Pile of Bath Towels™️! It’s Sharp Pile of Tote Bags™️!

Have a cat hunting crickets

When the brain cells have briefly aligned

If I understand the laws correctly, this spider squatting on my mailbox is now legally me. Please be patient as all bills and correspondence are now being handled by this spider. If you need me, please contact this spider.

I’m just saying if you have the opportunity to wear an astronaut costume to work why wouldn’t you

“Oh no, I forgot to refrigerate my acorns” is a sentence I’ve said today

You did it!!! You beautiful Bluesky bastards, the project is funded!! 💙

Donations to my project are currently being doubled but funds won’t last! Donate or share if you can so we can stop using the bookcase with the splinters 😬 I still don’t know if there’s a teachersky but hey #teachers #teacherlife amirite

Hosting trivia is fun because sometimes I learn my news from team names, and sometimes I don’t know I’ve learned my news from team names. Wednesday we had Beetlejuice Beetlejuice I won’t say it three times, Thursday was Boebertjuice etc, and just now scrolling skeets I find out why

If you enjoyed Summer of Solidarity just wait until I come up with some alliteration for fall/autumn because SOLIDARITY FOREVER BAYBEEEEE UAW workers are my heroes

Donations are currently being doubled while funds last! Every little bit will help get us to a classroom library we can be proud of! Please feel free to share ❤️

Halfway through my memorial margarita for Jimmy Buffet I remembered I really hate margaritas. Whoops

Things that have happened to me at Nationals Park today: 1. In a toilet paper catastrophe - multiple stalls out - rescued by a kind preteen running wads of TP like it was her job

On this Caturday, have yourself a Queen Jonesy of the Cardboard Castle and Brave Sir Scratchy of Crinkle Ball Hall

Two bees bumping into each other and going “woop” surrounded by octopus tentacles, some of which are holding rainbows of Bic Flair pens

Y’all I have busted one of my classroom bookcases beyond repair. I want my students to have pride in our classroom and that includes a nice looking library! Donate and/or signal boost as you feel comfortable, you’re very beautiful, I love you t.co/JOQeMw0FJd