Happy double anniversary to me.

October is here! Pro: objectively the best month Cons: taxes due, colonoscopy, and major surgery. Talk about a triple threat! I can barely think of three worse things in life.

Knowing everything you now know about social media and its effects on society and on you personally, if you had it to do over again, would you still join? Why or why not?

Written by me and posted elsewhere.

Prayers appreciated! My mom moves into assisted living Thurs. Please pray for strength & good spirits for her during this move & adjustment. Please pray for new friends who will be kind & welcoming. She had a horrible encounter with her soon-to-be neighbor yesterday. Divine intervention needed!

My appointment with the new specialist went well today! I like her a lot and feel like she is the right doctor with the right skill set and the right plan for me. Surgery is scheduled for late October. Thanks for praying!

Tomorrow morning, I meet with a new specialist–the one I think I’ve mentioned previously who is the most trained and specialized surgeon I have found in my state. I’m hoping to leave there feeling confident in her skills and with a plan of action I feel good about. Prayers very appreciated!

A room has opened up for my mom! She will be moving out of her home of 20+ years and into assisted living likely this month. So thankful but also crazy bonkers time for me at work, as I’m about to start working for a new judge. Prayers appreciated for getting her moved in as smoothly as possible!

We need art now more than ever. There’s a reason we turn to books, music, movies, and poetry in difficult times. Because someone took their pain and turned it into something beautiful. Art is how we process, survive, and connect. A world without art isn’t a world at all.

I am always trying to find workarounds. New systems. Ways to still get the job done. But nothing works. I am trying to outsmart Alzheimer’s, and it will beat me every damn time. I hate this disease more than I will ever be able to put into words.

I love my Indiana friends, but I will love you more in July.

frasier: niles did you see the world's two worst people are fighting? niles: i didn't know maris's mother was in town

I had to change the settings on who can reply to my death post bc it left containment & was going south. Word to the wise: when someone announces an imminent death in their family, & you think, “Is this the time to call this person a shrieking harpie?” No. No, in fact, it is not. Hope this helps!

I am telling close friends of the impending death of a relative, and each time, I am forcing myself to say that she is about to die. To die. Not to pass away. Such a harsh word, but I suspect we do ourselves a disservice when we try to soften the harshness of death with pretty euphemisms.

Thunder up! Go sportsball! It’s a good day to be an Okie.

MY PASTOR REBUKED JOHN MACARTHUR FROM THE PULPIT I COULD JUST DANCE WITH GLEE

The single most unexpected part of my tour of assisted living facilities today 😆😆😆

It has been A Very Bad Day. If you have any words of affirmation to spare, I would be grateful.

Hi! Have you invited a single person to spend Easter with you yet? Time’s a’ wastin’!

Listening to Patty Griffin’s “No Bad News” because my diagnostic mammogram came back all clear!!!

I was clearly such a delight at my mammogram that they’d like to see me again for more giggles. Yes, this is me using humor as a coping mechanism because it is absolutely zero fun & a ton of stress & anxiety to get called back for more testing. Prayers appreciated. Appointment 4/17 7:45 am Central.

Headed to a Ben Rector concert tonight and feeling fancy in a new shirt and borrowed jewelry. I AM DOING SOMETHING FUN ON A SATURDAY NIGHT. Huzzah! This is not the norm.

How have we not developed something better than a mammogram yet. How. For those keeping track, that’s 1 pelvic exam & 1 mammogram in the same week, plus a colonoscopy on deck. I don’t want to be the only 1 having all the fun. If you’re due for any of these procedures, please get them scheduled!

Insult to injury: being told during your gynecological exam that, hey, you’re now old enough to need a colonoscopy, too! It’s age 45, people, if you hadn’t heard. Fare thee well the good ol’ days of waiting til 50.

For all my griping about middle age, I will say there is such joy and freedom in arriving at the stage of life known as “I only shave my legs for my gynecologist.”

Hypothetically, if one had a dead car battery, where should one attempt to get a new one on the weekend?

I spent my lunch hour making a video to send to friends and family about what I want to happen after my death. Middle age is a hoot and a half. I ended the video by saying, “I make these statements freely.” IYKYK.

I received an unbelievably huge answer to prayer tonight. Truly astounding. I can feel the weight of this lifting from me. Glory to God!

I got offered a free ticket to a fun concert, and my first thought was, “But is it a seated venue?” And that’s how 45 is going.

The amount of time I spend worried about which response to my birb after her daily adventure is the “correct” one is probably counterproductive for a self-care app.

Written by me and posted elsewhere today.

This week, I explained to someone what “This is my Roman Empire” means and was reminded that there are large swaths of people just living their lives offline. What blissfully unaware weirdos.

Oh hey, I’m about to receive a terrifying lecture from Miranda Priestley for being blithely unaware of the origins of cerulean.

Less than an hour after my Ash Wednesday service, I found out that my aunt died. What a day for being reminded how fleeting our time here is. “Repent and believe the Gospel.”

Going to bed last night: feeling absolutely fine, better and more pain-free than normal, actually Getting up this morning: in so much pain I can barely walk and have to ambulate on my tiptoes MIDDLE AGE IS A SCAM. DO NOT FALL FOR IT.

Three degree windchill and a driveway to shovel wearing on the lower half of my person only a thin layer of Spandex for incomprehensible reasons? No problem!

Not to the degree of PH, but several folks I respected & trusted online proved themselves to be problematic & lacking integrity. Often, I trusted them because many of my mutuals trusted them. So their behavior that seemed off to me? Nah, it must be okay. I’m not doubting my instincts anymore.

I need Patriarchy Hannah and Megan Stoner to be friends.

In light of recent events on the other place we all left, I would just like to say that I’m a real person. (Which is EXACTLY what I’d say if I weren’t.) And my hatred of FaceTime and Zoom stems from social anxiety. (Sooooooo convenient, right?!)

Valentines for the Fall of Democracy I love you more than white Evangelicals love voting for a man who is the antithesis of everything they allegedly stand for. I love you more than Trump loves issuing executive orders. I love you more than Republicans love Lee Greenwood’s “God Bless the USA.”

Psssst…romantic love is not the highest and best form of love. Pass it on.

VDay celebrations starting early.

Roomie is watching the Superb Owl on the TV whilst I watch Scott and Tessa’s Moulin Rouge routine (my Roman Empire) on my phone. Everyone is happy.

Has anyone used the Finch self-care app? Thoughts?

God can forgive anything except posting Severance spoilers.

I’m struggling with my relationship to social media more than ever. I’ve found so much encouragement & so many kindred spirits. But now, a quick scroll through the timeline feels like being asked to hold not only my (multiple) anxiety (disorders), but also the whole world’s. It’s too heavy a weight.

This just in: Puppies are still cute. No one can take that away from you.

Please let this be the part of the movie where all the Kens get mad at each other and lose the mojo casa dojo house