I also wanted to highlight the very recent publication of SUAW colleague Omar Iqbal, whose book ‘Shadowy Shit’ is worth buying purely for the title alone! www.amazon.co.uk/Shadowy-Shit...

My weekly Shut Up and Write cohort are a talented bunch. Malavika Suresh for example has recently produced a body of research, some of which is now up on her website. malavikasuresh.com/blog1/

I seem to be cornering the market in the ‘two-sided monologue’ at the moment. Characters having conversations with themselves. I’ve just had my narrator say: ‘“You don’t half love the sound of your own voice” I often tell myself.’

I’m only now learning about ‘looksmaxxing’. The photos I’ve seen of young men who indulge do not leave me thinking ‘yep, looking good, my dude’. They leave me asking the question: ‘are you…*alright*?’

The meaning of ‘reading trends’ seems to be changing. One I’ve noticed: it’s not so much ‘what I’m reading’, it’s ’how long it took me to read it’. People claiming to have read Brothers Karamazov in two days. It’s a sort of ‘speed reading syndrome’ humble brag. I don’t understand.

Fankoo Mary! Here’s the first image that I’ve seen taken if my okay Adam and Yves being performed. A video will follow, I’m told.

#HorrorWritersChat Alternate nostril breathing. It calms anxiety. I recommend it. Also, get a life-sized doll.

#HorrorWritersChat Characters talking to themselves. I’ve just written a miniplay about a character with imaginary friend psychosis.

#HorrorWritersChat Self-imposed domestic isolation.

#HorrorWritersChat Fashionably late… Jez, short for Jezz, as you probably know by now, I write kitchen sink horror. I’m minded to mention the Hitchcock film Rear Window. Because it’s quite brilliant.

First photo that I’ve seen of the one-off performance of my miniplay Adam and Yves. More to come, plus video…

He caved. No surprise. So, no ‘Stone Ages’, just ‘Captain Caveman’.

You simply have to own a copy of ‘Diamonds, Ash and Fruitcake’ by Rilian Wickler. From the moment I picked it up ‘til the moment I put it down, I was transfixed. Some day I intend to read it.

I’d be perfectly happy to think that Kanye West has been denied access to the UK purely on the basis that his music is shit. And I say that not wishing to undermine the seriousness of his apparent political leaning, mental health notwithstanding.

I’ll have to miss this week’s #HorrorWritersChat as I’m going to a scriptwriting workshop on Wednesday evening - so don’t have too much fun without me!

A standout line in my miniplay ‘Would Like to Meet’ is when Trevor turns to his imaginary friend (Mister), in anticipation of a visit from a new female acquaintance: “I’m going to pretend you don’t exist”

What a lovely post from @magiclantern.bsky.social about Capture Spiral!

I’m going to post a song a day until Easter, as a collection of #SongsForSpringtime - music makes me happy, and I’m fed up of feeling sad about the state of the world. So listen along if you like. #17 Ólafur Arnalds ft. Nanna Bryndís Hilmarsdóttir: Particles youtu.be/90YvDfb24rw?...

Listen to VINEGAR AND BROWN PAPER open.spotify.com/episode/2Cuj...

I once managed to convince somebody in a pub that an anagram of ‘cat flap’ was ‘flapjack’. We were both rather drunk at the time. In the second round of that same conversation, I also convinced him that an anagram of ‘flapjack’ was ‘flatpack’.

Liminal horror isn’t new. It counts as ‘creepypasta’ these days (Backrooms). Interiority in horror, that sense of being trapped inside, alone (or *not*…) goes way back. Personally, I’m still scared of those interior spaces in the Ladybird version of Beauty and the Beast, before the Beast shows up. 😳

Folks sharing their favourite quotes from Capture Spiral is just the best thing.

I’m going to post a song a day until Easter, as a collection of #SongsForSpringtime - music makes me happy, and I’m fed up of feeling sad about the state of the world. So listen along if you like. #16 ionnalee and Zola Jesus: Matters youtu.be/dE0n2smtMKM?...

Amazing review of my book.

I’m going to post a song a day until Easter, as a collection of #SongsForSpringtime - music makes me happy, and I’m fed up of feeling sad about the state of the world. So listen along if you like. #15 Chelsea Wolfe and Emma Ruth Rundle: Anhedonia youtu.be/fiFAh32VMMo?...

INCOMING…

As somebody put it over on Facebook just now, not one of these people would survive a Wonka factory tour. She. Is. Fucking. In. Sane. She’s also a deeply damaged person. Despite acknowledging why she is the way she is, I’d enthusiastically do PPV on a live stream of her being fed to hungry pigs.

Actor Shaquile Yusuf, outside the New Wimbledon Theatre Studio, beside the poster/screen advertising Pen Pushers, in which he appeared as Dr. Agbetunsin in my miniplay ‘Adam and Yves’.

I’m going to post a song a day until Easter, as a collection of #SongsForSpringtime - music makes me happy, and I’m fed up of feeling sad about the state of the world. So listen along if you like. #14 iamamiwhoami: The Last Dancer youtu.be/i975qpdS7kE?...

You just kind of know that, when he talks about ‘the Stone Ages’ (why the plural?), he has this running on a loop through his rancid sponge of a brain.

#HorrorWritersChat Fankoo Gwee! So, this happened last night, which means I’m a playwright now. There’ll be photos and video in due course.

#HorrorWritersChat I’m not going to though. Instead I’m going to gnaw it to a sharp point and use this point to put out my eyes. I mean to deny them the satisfaction of knowing I can see them coming for me. That’ll teach them.

#HorrorWritersChat Imprisonment is frightening when it is flawed. Whatever is being kept under lock and key starts to become scary when there is a possibility that it might be able to escape. Or worse: it already *has* escaped…

I really don’t like the word ‘traybake’. It sounds like something scraped off and salvaged. A kind of loveless cake, full of suffering.

#HorrorWritersChat Hyper-literal, but banal. Like a child locked inside a wardrobe.

#HorrorWritersChat Jez, short for ‘Xylophone’, living my best early-retired life in Aberdeen, Scotland. I write ‘prosaic horror’, which means my favourite idea of imprisonment is simply ‘staying at home’.

I’m going to post a song a day until Easter, as a collection of #SongsForSpringtime - music makes me happy, and I’m fed up of feeling sad about the state of the world. So listen along if you like. #13 Haute & Freddy: Dance the Pain Away youtu.be/1BhJBoSILk4?...

Here’s how my mind works: I imagine something really quite important actually happening on 1st April, something newsworthy, and everybody going ‘nah, you don’t fool me’. Nobody believes it. If Trump dropped dead today, people would be like ‘yeah right, pull the other one mate, it’s got bells on’.

Today is April Fools’ Day and here are 10 ways to not get tricked. Method 1: ...see more

Good for you if you’re owed any of this missold car finance payout money. I’ve been getting texts and emails for months advising me to claim, which is funny as I’ve never owned a car.

Tonight! A laugh a minute (actually hopefully significantly more than that)

A reminder of the poetry of being alive.

I’m going to post a song a day until Easter, as a collection of #SongsForSpringtime - music makes me happy, and I’m fed up of feeling sad about the state of the world. So listen along if you like. #12 HANA: Chimera youtu.be/MHNb1k7YxeA?...

I’m going to post a song a day until Easter, as a collection of #SongsForSpringtime - music makes me happy, and I’m fed up of feeling sad about the state of the world. So listen along if you like. #11 Daniel Avery ft Cecile Believe: Rapture in Blue youtu.be/bZdCdpvofqQ?...

I do love the word ‘autopsy’. It’s just the cuddliest horror word.

Albert Spica would vote Reform UK.

I’m going to post a song a day until Easter, as a collection of #SongsForSpringtime - music makes me happy, and I’m fed up of feeling sad about the state of the world. So listen along if you like. #10 Turtle: Receive youtu.be/XmDVofxWXqo?...

What a lovely review of Capture Spiral, from Phil Smith, author of Albion’s Eco-Eerie.

I’m going to post a song a day until Easter, as a collection of #SongsForSpringtime - music makes me happy, and I’m fed up of feeling sad about the state of the world. So listen along if you like. #9 iamamiwhoami: kill youtu.be/OTnH3zs8wRo?...

That’s the book officially launched!