just a lil pre christmas snack

preparing for Christmas as a leftist 🎄

me:

i simply can’t control my facial expressions when people so casually announce “I asked/used ChatGPT for this” anymore, especially in a professional setting it’s getting me in so much trouble and i love watching them try to justify being a fucking moron

why do men twitch so fucking much when they are sleeping, this man just leaped into the air like a fish out of water and gave me a heart attack

i made sourdough bread again

last month it was gardening and now bread ?

yes

twitter is so cooked people are mad at me over sourdough bread

a cheddar cheese and italian herb sourdough loaf, my daughter is excelling baked at 6am this morning and it’s already gone, don’t bake men good bread they will steal it and eat the entire fucking thing when you’re in a meeting or your back is turned.

lil hedgehog sleeping in my allotment 🥹 this feels like i just stumbled upon a rare pokémon, i haven’t seen one irl since i was a kid !

my sourdough accidentally over-proofed so instead of throwing it away i used it to make an Italian herb and cheese foccacia instead

Cordelia is almost a month old! my daughter is getting stronger, here’s a loaf i made with her. 7/10 lil dense, need to work on my bulk fermentation but definitely my best tasting sourdough loaf so far !

mornin

honestly what an honour getting to accept my award last week in such a beautiful building from the deacon commander of the incorporation of gardeners 🥹 need to get this shit framed

hi

bleb

some loaves recently

the waiter walked by and said “slay” and he was correct

your favourite gardening gremlin wins

the plot in november she needed a little refresh

i kinda ate with that one

cordelia is an overachiever, activating in the first two days like girl calm down I haven’t even seasoned my cast iron dutch oven yet for you

yes my whole personality is about to be about my new sourdough starter cordelia, i’m so ashamed to be this white rn

After spending the night in hospital with an allergic reaction and taking a few days to recover I’ve developed tonsillitis, WHOEVER is fucking with my voodoo doll rn pls just give me a break am on my last legs here.

welp

this is currently what i look like in the hospital waiting room following an allergic reaction It’s giving “fuck it’s a sunday” vibes

men with metal bed frames why do you hate yourselves and your neighbour’s ?

i highly recommend not doing this, i feel awful and sore today, it’s like both arms have wankers cramp x100 with no reprieve

i had 6 vaccines today and I’m starting to glow green like mr burns

my worst nightmare just happened the infamous Glasgow photographer in the city centre just snapped a shot of me rushing to an appointment i swear if i see it on his insta im going off grid and living in a forest

proof of life

haven’t been able to get to my plot for the last two weeks bc life busy, dark nights etc i need my garden therapy or i fear i will go insane, i need to touch dirt!

George Takei knows my name omg

there’s no middle ground in my dms it’s just been this on repeat for the last 10 days

if i had a penny for the amount of death threats i’ve had this week i would be absolutely filthy rich and that’s not even an exaggeration

harry potter tattoos have a significantly higher regret rate than any gender affirming surgeries

sooooooo, i just got an email! i didn’t get first place but i am getting an award and a prize for coming in second or third ? it’s not really been confirmed where i placed 😂 there’s literally thousands of allotment plots in my city and i still placed so huge achievement 🥹♥️

10 games to get to know me qt with yours

oh they are so good wtf

Recipe testing my homemade autumn chutney (pending baking)

big basket of dried butter beans from the archway ! I dropped the basket it was that heavy 🥺

this getting nearly 100k likes on the other site, transphobes are of course being completely normal about it and not stroking the fuck out

if I paid for premium on Twitter I would’ve made bank but I refuse to also give that man my own money

the way terfs can’t decipher humour and sarcasm is great because I’m trying to give them an aneurysm

what are you doing to me French Twitter

men are so funny bc how you gonna police my body when you can’t even keep your own hair on your head, focus on your own problems baldo and fix them whispies

had my lovely French friend round for lunch today and I asked her to read this aloud and it sounded so beautiful but she was like ummmm they’ve just called you a slut and a pig basically 😂 the QT has done like 10 times better than my post lmao

it’s soup season bitches

missed my bois but one of them shat on my slippers guess who