The research suggests, and this is unconfirmed, that the other's in the Albert Hall

Obviously pleased Foden is back in the England squad but also slightly disappointed because I was looking forward to being angry he'd been left out. That's how I roll. I still have Trent for that I guess.

Mid Morning Matters launched 15 years ago today. I am old. www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-ug...

Weird that Andrew, who is a prince, isn't allowed to call himself Prince Andrew. But the king, who isn't a prince, is still Prince Charles

Saying prince Andrew doesn't deserve his titles or his royal lodge suggests the rest of them do deserve their titles and their houses which is why he might as well keep the lot if you ask me. wgaf

mate I step back from public life every monday morning. you'll be getting leathered again by thurs

David Cross folks.

Nothing new obv but the sunday times comment pages are an absolute bin fire

How are you? It's Alan (Partridge)

Roommate: Hello. Robinson: Hello. Roommate: Tell me, what were your reasons/motives for committing the murder? Robinson: My reasons/motives for committing the murder were as follows:

You ever take it off any sweet jumps?

The entire vibe of the Laura Kuenssberg show is 'don't worry, we know you don't want to see aggro on a Sunday' which is the exact opposite of what you want from it

Who's more gutted? Guehi because he didn't get the transfer he wanted or James Trafford because he did?

I personally am enjoying the ridiculousness of this law becoming more laughable and obvious every day while government ministers have to come out to defend it wearing their toughest, most Starmery stupid fucking faces

This straight-on camera angle is the camera angle you'd choose if you had no interest in football

A CEO rubbing himself up against one of his senior team at a Coldplay concert is the purest LinkedIn energy I've ever heard of

This shoot out is known as a reverse Shilton

Have you got to go in for your tea now? Is it time for a little sit down? Cricket is not a sport

Imagine writing a walking memoir that's not even true

Thank god for this, after an absolutely wild week where the commentariat, some of whom can be alright, have completely their lost their baps over the bbc Glastonbury thing and are now straight up gaslighting you as to what constitutes terrorism and antisemitism

One thing that makes me doubt this leaked set list is that no one - not even the most devoted Oasis fan - has ever said 'you know what song I want to hear now? Hello'

Starmer saying he's reforming disability benefit is like Cameron saying he reformed local libraries. There's nothing reformy about it. It's a cut.

"Off the Germans"

DAD: I will not be watching Man City play whichever team they're up against today. KIDS: Wydad. DAD: Because the Club World Cup is a pile of shit.

“But we start at the City Ground where Nottingham Forest, hungry for points and starved of success, need to find a way past the Chelsea blockade. But will the Blues' greater firepower lay waste to Forest’s Champions League dream? Steve Wilson was there. They also murdered 15 medics in cold blood.”

A party constantly on the defensive, only ever trying to fend off criticism. Never trying to inspire people or muster enthusiasm. Not once. Ever.

I’m not a celebrated political strategist - unlike another Irishman of a similar vintage living in the U.K. - but to putting your weakest position (immigration) front and centre of almost every media intervention and major policy announcement seems like political madness.

Kneecap's manager is the new Mick Lynch. Unbelievable at interviews

They're making Flint

we're about an hour away from someone saying the tariffs are a dead cat to stop people talking about the Signal chat

This week's column is on how clinging on and hoping for a Labour surge either in terms of popularity or well formulated policy is now for the birds www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...

Just a bullshit VAR decision. Wow

If it was really about promoting literacy, it wouldn't be called world book day. The correct name for a world book is an atlas.

The one thing funny to come out of this is Starmer's team being so delighted to have wooed Trump only for it to look this shitty 24 hours later

The irony @bbcnewsnight.bsky.social

The men's fashion section of newspapers is literally just 'Harry Styles has been seen wearing [unusual item]. How would I, a 50 year old columnist raising an eyebrow in this photo, get on when I wore it for a week?'

Potential character name: Carl Melchizedek

Would love a mashup of the Saudi national anthem with sweet Caroline

Gundogan starting nearly every game. The guy cannot run. Walker 8kmh slower than last season. 8! Savinho, Nunes, Kovacic, Doku wouldn't get near the Liverpool/Arsenal teams. Same with Lewis sadly. Foden's head has gone. Which other squad has *one* striker? Some crazy, crazy decisions

What's the most annoying meal in cinema? For me it's the breakfast scene in Call Me By Your Name, where 6'5, 15-stone Armie Hammer has one boiled egg on its own, is offered a second one and says nah better not

Jesus, talk about a White Christmas

Went to see Wicked. Looks incredible, great finale. Hadn't seen the stage version so was maybe expecting a more Wizard of Ozzy fever dream vibe and not your standard 'fitting in at school, who'll get a date to the prom' stuff. Quite similar to the Monsters High movie but double the length

...but let's take nothing away from Spurs or whoever it was who took their chances quite well

this week's column www.theguardian.com/sport/2024/n...

When I'm off to a pub in my free time, it always feels pointless to choose one where I think I'll like the clientele. Instead, I go to one that's full of dicks in order to broaden my horizons and have my views challenged in the marketplace of ideas - again, I do this is for fun in my own time

Favourite bit of this is when he attempts one of his funny Clarksonisms only to find the cupboard is bare. "It's difficult to be angry on somebody else's behalf. That's like being... [Ooh this'll be good. What's it like being?] No, I'm not angry on someone else's behalf."

weird coincidence, I had to read a book in 8th grade that was about exactly this sort of thing, it's pretty obscure, more like a diary really

At the end of the day, farmers want to put food on the table. And they will fight to produce it. Clarkson wants food on the table at the end of the day. Or he will fight a producer.