Vampires aren't blood starved, they're touch starved. They're just biting you because they don't have anyone to hug :(

Orcs aren't chaotic evil, it's just that when they see humans they're overwhelmed with cuteness aggression

If you critically fail at disbelieving an illusion, it stops being an illusion. That's real now.

Banish everything. Literally everything. Away it fucking goes.

No R, no P, only G

RPG Life Hack When your GM describes a scene, you can actually picture anything you like. It doesn't have to match the description. It doesn't even have to have anything to do with the game. The GM can't tell and can't stop you even if they could.

"While there's nothing technically wrong with your necromancy school application, I really must remind you that the spell is called 'Rapid Aging' and not 'Transmute MILF To GILF'"

Needlessly confusing spells by school Abjuration: When you suffer wounds, history alters so that you actually suffered that wound 10 years ago, changing your past but making it so it's fully healed now.

Vampire the Masquerade but the Nosferatu are the fancy, upper class sophisticates and the Toreador are the ones eating rats in sewers. Don't assume things based on appearance, guys.

Post-Partum Lycanthropy

Shadowrun but everyone's besties. They're all friends frolicking hand in hand through the fields.

Power word: Yippie!

"So, have you created a character?" "Sure, here you go!" "Excuse me, this is a character sheet. I distinctly told you to make a character. "

Werewolves who transform when they see a full anything.

Ensure that your game is truly balanced by giving all characters and NPCs exactly the same stats.

Roll your dice in a box and close it before anyone can see what you rolled. According to quantum mechanics the dice now has all 20 results at once until someone checks, meaning that all possible results of your character's action occur at once.

Your character has a dark, terrible secret. So secret the other players don't know it. The GM doesn't know it. You don't know it. But it's there.

Reverse mimics. Doors and treasure chests disguised as monsters.

Killing the final boss destroys the world. Letting the final boss live also destroys the world.

The Stalker Of The Darkness Between The Worlds, the Ur-Dragon, The Throne Of Unholy Flames, The Ravager Of Stars, The Beast The Gods Fear, the Mother of All Woes has manifested once more. 1 HP, an AC of 5 and deals 1d4 damage to a single target. It does, to be fair, also have one hell of a PR team.

All enemies have super-hearing, If any PC makes any noise, every bad guy in the setting shows up to whup their ass at once.

Morally grey enemies Monster who is protecting its young but also attacks by grabbing its young by the legs and swinging them as weapons. Monster that eats people but also regularly re-blogs signal boosts for important social causes.

Avoid minmaxing by having everyone make the character of the player they hate the most

Look, you can't expect all quests to be epic. The Archmage of the Seven Stars needs a mighty hero to get them a sandwich. Hold the pickles. No, they can't do it themselves. Do you see a sandwich star? They don't, and they'd fucking know, wouldn't they?

Folk horror, a phrase which here means standard horror but all the monsters are badly playing a ukulele.

Summon Enriched Uranium Elemental

Person with OCD plagued by teleporting succubi, call that suffering from intrusive thots .

This game has three skills: Combat Bake a four-layer red velvet cake Miscellaneous

No-one will tell the PCs about plot hooks, because they like the PCs and don't want them to die.

base a dungeon on home alone and see how long it takes people to notice

Instead of giving your players exp or advantage for good roleplaying, give them a little smooch.

All the great forces of evil have been defeated, leading to the new scourge - all the mighty adventurers and noble heroes now out of a job.

Quick ways to build a character if you're struggling Start with an existing character to take out most of the work. Just change the name, personality, goals, appearance, motivation, backstory and abilities.

The Orcs are trying to clear up their image, so now they're reverse-raiding villages to leave behind gift baskets and apology letters in the middle of the night.

Make the main superhero team of your setting the Justice League but they say "fuck", so now it's not a childish comic game but Deep and Mature.

Just don't free Cthulhu from his eon-old prison beneath the waves. It won't be good for you and it's a lot of effort. Just watch TV or something instead.

Worried about how your players will respond to your big reveal? Have 5 big reveals, one after the other, and then let your players vote on which one gets to be canon.

"Oh no, the last Dark Lord was the one focused on Dark Conquest. My platform is focused more on Dark Agriculture and Dark Healthcare Reform."

base each session of your campaign on an episode of the D&D cartoon

Book of vile darkness is outside your price range. We have the book of passive-aggressive meanness, though.

Implement critical fumble tables and nat-one-is-an-autofail but only for the player you like the least.

Dwarves and Elves are doing a job swap thing. The Elves have dug a hole 2ft by ineffectually flailing their picks at the ground while Dwarves have found the answer to all philosophical questions as "who gives a shit?"

Big bad who keeps doomscrolling instead of finishing off the chosen one, call that executionive dysfunction.

If a player rolls 3 natural 20s in a row, they get to remove any one NPC from the campaign no questions asked.

Evil AIs but they act like actual AIs. The Shadow Network tries to take over the world but it immediately fucks up the maths and is completely wrong about how politics works so it's mostly just annoying.

lycanthrope spellcasters, or witchwolves

Cthulhu isn't trapped in R'yleh because of any mystical bindings or incorrect stars or anything, it's just because he's big and can't get through the door.

D&D but without the rule where anyone can eat anyone else's character sheet at any given time.

Some genre ideas based on how I, Mod Paper, have mistyped when tagging fantasty fatnasty skyfi hooror sigh-fi (this one was autocorrect's fault)

Talking to someone who doesn't know rpgs and they mentioned their son preferred being GM. I said me too. Their reaction implied they thought this made us rivals competing for players and if we met we'd fight to the death. Anyway my point is you other GMs better watch your back.