My toxic trait is that I really like this weather.

The age distribution at the @guster.bsky.social concert is funny. Mostly folks in their 40s/50s (oh hai) and then a bump at the younger end for all the folks bringing their kids (it me again).

There are a lot of great medical reasons besides preventing pregnancy to use hormonal contraception. But I'm going to ignore those for a moment and say, I AM HERE TO FIGHT FOR CONSEQUENCE-FREE SEX FOR ALL.

"it’s ridiculous to suggest that DOGE’s program cancellations won’t cause any deaths. The range of numbers here seems to be between a few million and tens of millions, and neither end of that spectrum absolves Musk." www.theargumentmag.com/p/elon-musks...

every once in awhile, I remember that I have an asteroid named after me and get surprised that when I drop this into casual conversations, people are impressed.

Why does this read like SQL?

Think of me fondly as I enter the thunderdome aka Costco on a Saturday.

The teen has friends over and they all think the toddler is cute. Also since the teen doesn't want to look like an asshole in front of her friends, she can't easily tell the toddler to go away. From what I can tell, this is the best day of the toddler's life. "I go see eonni's friends!"

I just—like, sure, being a trillionaire is cool I guess but what’s it all for if you haven’t even seen the wreckage of the titanic firsthand

"Why is the chair messy mama?" - toddler who is holding the world's drippiest peach while standing on the arm of the chair

The toddler's new favorite activity is to scream into a fan. Summer vacation is going well

As a spurs fan, sigh.

I might be the only person in Chicago sitting outside because it's finally in the 90s and humid and now I am lizard.

What is a normal price for a haircut+tip for a teen with long hair?

The Catholic Church told my parents that they shouldn't get married bc she couldn't have children due to chronic illness. Joke was on the church since instead they went the international human trafficking route instead. 🥚

The toddler's new favorite thing is to walk up the small slide we have and jump to the bottom. I can't tell if this is a stove touching moment or if she's going to concuss herself on the wrong slide. Either way she just promised she would definitely try this on a big slide.

Perfect www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/new...

Google changing the favicon for Google Drive has probably cost me like hours of productivity bc I will not find GDrive and then my unmedicated ADHD self will forget what I was doing and then move on to a different task.

The most heartbreaking thing about the start of summer vacation is that the toddler loves her teachers and little baby friends and she is so sad she doesn't get to see them anymore. The second most heartbreaking thing is having to contain her 24/7 🫠

for whomst?

There's a French immersion school nearby and half the time I'm at a particular coffee shop, there are people practicing French badly. I'm about to scream, "je suis Muzzy" if these people don't use their indoor voices.

My older kiddo graduated from 8th grade today and I can't wrap my head around the fact that I now have a child in high school.

The toddler stole a beanie baby from the neighborhood garage sale and when I asked her about it, she said "but he loves it here wiff me". Peak second child behavior.

Me: what happened to your pants? Toddler: oh I take them off because I home. Dada says I have to wear pants to school but I home. 😤

At dinner tonight the teen was having a meltdown over her chem final. Meanwhile the toddler is screaming bc she jammed her arm into the back of the chair and legitimately cannot get it unstuck. So what I'm saying is that know that you don't have to do this to yourself (progeny).

yes this, i couldn't figure out how to say it earlier but: this is why the KPax crim narrative simply cannot be the focus these mf's looooooooooooooooooooove to be the victim, they literally live for it

I had the privilege of getting to see the Obama Presidential Center before it opened bc one of my friends worked for the department of education way back in the day. The space is beautiful, maximally inclusive, meant for community, and heartbreaking bc this is the future we could have had.

I really love living in a walkable city.

My unpopular opinion of the day is that .md is a terrible format if you even think you might need to show a document to someone who is non-technical.

A bad part of contract work is sending invoices. My "incentive" was that I couldn't buy new contact lenses until I sent in my April invoice but then I broke my glasses. So what I'm saying is that at 12 AM I needed the husband to babysit me while I filed my invoice bc I still would not have done it

Teen: Should I rage email my teacher? Toddler: YES!

Starting the parenting off strong today by telling the toddler that we don't bite people on the face. The husband then helpfully added, "yeah that's how you get sent to Florida"

I was so happy about it warming up that I forgot that now the inside will be aggressively frigid.

I opened my front door to pick up an Instacart order and lo and behold the jehovahs witnesses were standing on the stairs bc they were going door to door but I was wearing a top so hoochie that they handed me a card and ran away.

the top three answers in #datascience are "It depends", "random.seed(42)", "that's not how math works"

love a commit message that starts with "hard code"

TFW you're trying to write something in VScode and it WILL NOT STOP AUTOCOMPLETING. omggggg just let me write my shitty text. :( :( :(

today for breakfastlunch I made instant mashed potatoes with pasteurized egg whites, bone broth, and powered cheese so just call me Wylie Dufresne because if this is not peak molecular gastronomy/food science then I don't know what is.

An antimeme. No matter how many times monads are explained, nobody ever retains what it is.

When it's the teen's bday, it's easy to take her out to dinner or make her favorite meal. For the toddler, she is a nightmare in a restaurant and her favorite foods are cucumbers, trader joes takis, and $12 blueberries, which together lacks enough protein to be a complete meal.

The #SciPy2026 schedule is live 🎉 🚀 Get ready for an amazing week of talks, tutorials, community events, and great hallway conversations! Can’t wait to see you all in Minneapolis soon 🐍📊 Start planning your week ➡️ www.scipy2026.scipy.org/schedule

We did it! with just over 2 hours to spare. I have a meeting in 4 hours and 38 minutes. That seems like more than enough time to wake up in the middle of a REM cycle so I feel like death all day.

NeurIPS is really trying to kill me with the anywhere on earth submission deadline.

"hey don't look at the number of commits" is not the most reassuring note in a PR.

I love my children. I do not regret having them in general, but today specifically when I need to be awake and getting things done? I feel like I could have gotten more sleep without the toddler making snow angels in bed last night.

my local costco, which became reddit famous for having a dead rat in the blueberry section, is phasing out waterloo sparkling water for rambler and that is the lesser of the two austin-ish fizzy beverages.

Decided that I wanted to pick up the toddler from school (on foot) to get out of the house/touch grass but then a bug flew into my mouth and now I'm never leaving my house again.

One of the most controlling things my first college boyfriend ever did to me was install gentoo on my laptop. By the end of college I had upgraded to Debian and my now husband.

trying to work while the husband is sick is basically just throwing crackers and water at the toddler until she leaves me along long enough to update kubernetes what is my life?

Recovery update on the GoFundMe. I'm home, I'm healing (slowly), more surgery is coming, and Mystic is providing excellent supervisory care in the meantime. www.gofundme.com/f/help-matth...