Spencer Pratt is to politics what six-seven is too hilarious.

Spence Pratt is to public service what Josef Mengele was to patient care.

Spencer Pratt is the stupid fat hobbit of Wile E. Coyotes.

The face you make when you realize Marmalade Jabba the Hutt still has 2+ years as President.

I think this mother fucker lives under a bridge and eats billy goats.

If cum sock under a teenage boy's bed were a person.

How did I only just discover that Don Jr is marrying the daughter of a prominent Epstein enabler? Her late dad, a banker, wrote Epstein a reference letter calling him "a gentleman of the highest integrity" to help get him tax breaks &… his island. Can’t make this stuff up.

Jeff Bezos is starting to look like Ernest Hemingway's bloated liver.

Donald Trump isn't attending his son's wedding only because Don Jr. didn't steal enough from the children's cancer charity.

If itchy asshole were a person

Tony Hinchcliffe is the Chud the Builder of Rob Schneiders.

I just saw Pete Hegseth's playlist: "One bourbon, one Scotch, one beer" by George Thorogood. That's it.

the Trump statue looks like a butt plug for the Jolly Green Giant.

Which will we see first, the Trump phone or the Epstein Files? Cast your vote below.

Remember when the worst you could get on a cruise ship was a few STD's?

To recover from being bitten by a brown recluse spider, Kyle Rittenhouse should take a relaxing cruise on MV Hondius

A staggering lush and a drooling drunk walk into a bar. Bartender says, "Good evening Mr. Hegseth and Mr. Patel."

What is 'Kash me outside' Patel up to tonight?

Where are my bitches @dannythedevil666.bsky.social and @paulmorris.bsky.social and @razzle.bsky.social ?? Come out come out wherever you are!

Jesus, I thought Artemis II was a pill to clear my herpes!

The younger generation thinks Artemis II is a video game where they didn't hear about Artemis I.

Bondi and Noem are scissoring .... puppies right now.

Pam Bondi is to lawyer'ing as Winnie the Pooh being a fuck stud.

Pam Bondi is the aborted fetus of I shit my pants.

Pam Bondi is to lawyer'ing what Trump is Nobel Prize for Poetry'ing.

Pam Bondi is to lawyer'ing what Chuck E. Cheese is to pizza'ing.

Pam Bondi is to lawyer'ing what Rob Schneider is to soldier'ing.

Where is the fantastically gay duo of @paulmorris.bsky.social and @dannythedevil666.bsky.social ?

Why do Kash Patel's emails all start with: "Hello, I'm in great admiration of the powerful and dreamy-eyed Donald Trump." ?

Tiger Woods crashed another SUV.

Tiger Woods must pay 45 million dollars a year for car insurance.

Tiger Woods' bumper sticker - "If you can read this you must be upside down."

Tiger Woods has rolled more cars than he has Denny's waitresses.

Tiger Woods longest drive is from his house to the Oxycodone store.

Tiger Woods drives like no one is watching.

Tiger Woods has the driving yips.

If Tiger Woods lived in Mar-A-Largo not only would he get away with DUI, he'd also get away with child rape.

WARNING: Cringe, hack, stereotype joke: Tiger Woods drives like an Asian woman. Wait, his mom is Asian. (it's just a joke. calm down)

Imagine how many people will shit and piss on Donald Trump's grave when he dies?!

If kitty litter was a person it would be John Fetterman

John Letterman as a valet: Steals your loose change Easts your marijuana roach Leaves your radio on early 2000's Nu-metal

Chuck Norris made films for pre-Barstool Sports dudes.

The name of Amelia Earhart's plane was Subaru Forester.

John Fetterman thinks pickleball is a food.

John Fetterman has calluses on the back of his hands from dragging his knuckles so much.

John Fetterman thinks nose picking is a sport

John Fetterman dresses like Walmart is his church.

Jesus Christ I hope this woman does not have perimenopause 'cause we about to get nuked.

John Fetterman patches his underwear to save money.

John Fetterman has pet snails and he paints their shells in Nascar themes.