Remember when the worst you could get on a cruise ship was a few STD's?

To recover from being bitten by a brown recluse spider, Kyle Rittenhouse should take a relaxing cruise on MV Hondius

A staggering lush and a drooling drunk walk into a bar. Bartender says, "Good evening Mr. Hegseth and Mr. Patel."

What is 'Kash me outside' Patel up to tonight?

Where are my bitches @dannythedevil666.bsky.social and @paulmorris.bsky.social and @razzle.bsky.social ?? Come out come out wherever you are!

Jesus, I thought Artemis II was a pill to clear my herpes!

The younger generation thinks Artemis II is a video game where they didn't hear about Artemis I.

Bondi and Noem are scissoring .... puppies right now.

Pam Bondi is to lawyer'ing as Winnie the Pooh being a fuck stud.

Pam Bondi is the aborted fetus of I shit my pants.

Pam Bondi is to lawyer'ing what Trump is Nobel Prize for Poetry'ing.

Pam Bondi is to lawyer'ing what Chuck E. Cheese is to pizza'ing.

Pam Bondi is to lawyer'ing what Rob Schneider is to soldier'ing.

Where is the fantastically gay duo of @paulmorris.bsky.social and @dannythedevil666.bsky.social ?

Why do Kash Patel's emails all start with: "Hello, I'm in great admiration of the powerful and dreamy-eyed Donald Trump." ?

Tiger Woods crashed another SUV.

Tiger Woods must pay 45 million dollars a year for car insurance.

Tiger Woods' bumper sticker - "If you can read this you must be upside down."

Tiger Woods has rolled more cars than he has Denny's waitresses.

Tiger Woods longest drive is from his house to the Oxycodone store.

Tiger Woods drives like no one is watching.

Tiger Woods has the driving yips.

If Tiger Woods lived in Mar-A-Largo not only would he get away with DUI, he'd also get away with child rape.

WARNING: Cringe, hack, stereotype joke: Tiger Woods drives like an Asian woman. Wait, his mom is Asian. (it's just a joke. calm down)

Imagine how many people will shit and piss on Donald Trump's grave when he dies?!

If kitty litter was a person it would be John Fetterman

John Letterman as a valet: Steals your loose change Easts your marijuana roach Leaves your radio on early 2000's Nu-metal

Chuck Norris made films for pre-Barstool Sports dudes.

The name of Amelia Earhart's plane was Subaru Forester.

John Fetterman thinks pickleball is a food.

John Fetterman has calluses on the back of his hands from dragging his knuckles so much.

John Fetterman thinks nose picking is a sport

John Fetterman dresses like Walmart is his church.

Jesus Christ I hope this woman does not have perimenopause 'cause we about to get nuked.

John Fetterman patches his underwear to save money.

John Fetterman has pet snails and he paints their shells in Nascar themes.

John Fetterman has pet snails and he paints their shells in Nascar themes.

Same vibe.

John Fetterman's the type of dude who goes to free 'concerts in the park' to get contact highs.

John Fetterman creeps out from under bridges to snack on billy goats.

Fetterman's going to rotate your tires and check your oil.

Saying: "Dress for the job you want." John Letterman: "Ok, I'd like to be a laundry porter in a maximum Federal prison."

Laura Boomer gets injections of Silly Putty.

Laura Loomer has the face of a 1930's ventriloquist dummy.

Laura Loomer's face is shown topographically.

Where are my 2 little hamsters @paulmorris.bsky.social and @dannythedevil666.bsky.social ?

Which daddy is the real daddy? Mark or Wayne?

How much do you want to bet that Trump will try to call "Tony Stark" for more missiles?

Markwayne Mullin is a the name of an actor in trailer park porn.

Isn't Markwayne Mullin the name of the car Thelma and Louise drove off the cliff?