Seems to me that everyone needs to grow the fuck up.

Sports news

Worst Eric and Ernie statue ever.

He's gonna nuke us after this, isn't he? #rydercup

The behaviour of the American fans at the Ryder Cup is an utter disgrace. But these are the people who went cheered Trump to the rafters when he showed up there yesterday, so they're obviously his people, and so we shouldn't be surprised that they're acting like utter douchamapricks.

But no, by all means UK press, tell me again how it's Harry who has brought shame upon the Royals. news.sky.com/story/elon-m...

Uh oh. BBC News - www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/c4... Live updates: 'Multiple injuries and fatalities' in shooting at ICE facility in Texas - BBC News

Well, where's this #rapture then?

"And stay out!"

Well, that's Peston sacked by the weekend.

Farage outside Windsor Castle.

"The King and Donald Trump have had a fight."

OK, I'm wrapping the tin foil around my head as I type, but does anyone else think the alleged use of the phrase "my love" in the Tyler Robinson texts is a bit.... well, odd? Last time a 22 year old American put that in writing to their love, they then went off to fight the Battle of Gettysburg.

Meanwhile, at Windsor Castle.... "Look, is there a way one could temporarily abdicate until Friday?"

GODDAMN IT 😡

Somebody mentioned to me Debbie Gibson turned 55 a couple of weeks ago. And then casually mentioned Kim Wilde is getting a bus pass in November. I shall be spending the rest of the day with like this, and I will not be taking any questions.

Poppy season is going to be horrendous this year, isn't it?

GASP. SHOCK. HORROR.

What by winning an award that has been won by those two Tyneside rapscallion for the last 23 years and is voted for by the public? Yeah, people sure don't miss him.

Well, this is fun. 👍 #itfc

"Heavens to betsy, what's that pesky troublesome fellow Vlad done now?"

Can only assume Trump has been on the phone to his besties Vlad and Bibi saying "I'm in the shit here, lads. The birthday book is out. Any chance of some distractions?" (Fetches more tin foil for hat)

Ooh, look what I've just stumbled across on YouTube! Altogether now "It's the Tower of London Where the President of England Cuts off the heads of his wives" youtu.be/jNRCadHsUqM?...

The nation waits with baited breath what @mrjamesob.bsky.social is going to discuss this morning. Epstein book? Boris files? Knowing our luck... "Thank you Nick, and it occurs to me that we are now in September, the nights are drawing in, and so I'd love to know what your Christmas plans are."

Wouldn't surprise me one jot if the Palace is on the phone to Downing Street querying if next week is such a good idea.

So, in the last couple of hours, it's been revealed that Boris Johnson is Grifty McGrifterson, and Donald Trump is a lying liar. I'm astonished.

"Atlantic wet, say scientists"

Inside the Oval Office later after Trump gets booed by 25000 New Yorkers.

"Sorry about that pit stop Lando" Lando:

Lando coming out of the pit lane #italiangp

Amusing watching 15000 phones all getting the alert at once at the cricket.

Free speech latest. www.benrothenberg.com/p/us-open-do...

I'd rather have "Sorry, but looks like you the broke the ministerial code, so I'll accept your resignation", than "Sorry, but looks like you broke the ministerial code, but don't worry, we'll form a square around the Prittster."

So that's a resigning Deputy Prime Minister and a royal death in the space of half an hour. Nice dull day.

Nadine Dorries pledges loyalty to an inadequate insecure cowardly traitor who could well be a Russian asset and is utterly incapable of being a grown up that can take responsibility for their actions. So no change there.

The word "THIS" in letters carved out of solid rock so massive they can be seen from space.

Woken up to find the US is having it's own Burnsy, Cheeks, Gibbo, Ricey, Josh and Morty moment. Admittedly, you might have to look that one up.

Me: Alright, we've all had a chuckle over the Nunez transfer, but now, we supporters of #itfc need to be grown up and mature. Also me:

Think Trump was a hair's breadth away from offering Putin a high five there.

😡 #itfc

One would assume that the swapping of territory involves Russia getting the whole of Eastern Ukraine to link up with the Crimea, and Ukraine to get the back garden of a house in Omsk that's been abandoned since 1983.

Movie scenes that make you scream "You stupid twat!" at the screen no matter how many times you've seen it number 1: