feeling like a monster that no one can love… today is a day

interesting to know that the burka like garment was worn by royal and elite people to preserve their privacy dating back to ancient Greece, it had nothing to do with religion…

heartspur

however, i need a new vacuum cleaner and a blender for art purposes… thank u

general capitalist consumerism grosses me out people are pigs

black Friday is also disgusting

psa- i utterly dislike xmas holidays and how it takes over everything and that its the predominant culture in the usa. i am thr xmas grinch f u

plz tell me there is more not just this?

when i cry a lot my eyes turn green, when i am in love they turn orange. im like a human mood ring.

call to prayer in p slope, feels like home

a sucker for industrial straight bleach! the smell of a sterile hospital! yesss mam

heres a cute self portrait of meiiow (the alchemist who achieved illumination - clavis artis)

but i cant spend a birthday with you

listening to this and i know he would appreciate…

really wanting to read tarot but also not… its calling me but i am restraining myself. letting the natural timing of things unfold without knowing. really just not wanting to engage with my subconscious atm… while constantly engaging and shes tired

grateful i have the skill to sense internal bullshit. their indifference, their private unwillingness to be friends but public display of coy boundaries

its brick out and i made a nice chai and sipping in my 100 °F apartment - bless.

its persian jazz hour in the slope w two dogs and a cat who is indecisive about going in or staying out

im ok with being alone, i live in my body alone, i think my thought alone, i breath alone, born alone, i will be ok

together in one room like two opposite magnets repelling against one another like two squares tumbling with jagged edges poking and scratching and agitating, can you really call this love a match made in heaven

i want to be with him and i want to be apart. i want his togetherness i want his presence and essence and atoms and breaths and smells around me around the corner looking back at me smiling wanting me but not in the same room. if we can separate but be together like a fine dust, a spore like glue

its brick out and i found parking outside my apt. nyc makes small dreams really big

not fully healed, wondering if ill ever be. or is this it….

okaayy hot warehouse men/art shippers. where is the calendar!! 🔥

thinking about how bitchy i can be towards people and then when they die i feel guilty for being a bitch. all while that bitch mode was me setting boundaries…i could have stated my boundaries more gently. i don’t know. life is precious. even if they were an asshole. doesn’t mean u have to be one…😕

ugh i agreed to it…. i just feel like at this point i have nothing to lose.

im feeling so sensitive these days/weeks/months/years. so at least becoming more and more aware of myself and feeling sensitive to my environment as a result. what was good before doesnt feel good anymore

The separation pattern suggests: not fully relaxed not anxious, but definitely tense or managing emotion focused, rehearsed, or trying to remain composed in a public or formal moment

The thumbs crossing loosely One thumb is lightly over the other — not pressed hard. That can indicate the person is: trying to appear calm but still feeling tension underneath

The ring and pinky fingers look more compressed. Those fingers often stay closer together when someone is trying to keep a composed posture. It’s like they’re trying to “collect” their hands to appear controlled.

The index fingers are slightly apart This often indicates: alertness, mild defensiveness, preparing to respond or react, People usually separate their index fingers slightly when they’re thinking, bracing, or focusing hard.

Mild tension: The clasp seems somewhat firm, which can indicate nervousness, irritation, or anticipatory stress.

Hands placed close to the body: This usually means someone is grounding themselves or maintaining a composed, inward-focused stance.

Firm pressure: The fingers look like they’re held tightly, not loosely. This can imply tension, focus, or an attempt to contain emotion or control body language.

Closed, protective gesture: Interlacing fingers tends to signal a desire for control, restraint, or composure. It’s common in interviews or situations requiring formality.

after 3 years of living in my current neighborhood, and having left it just temporarily for a couple days, i am so grateful i live where i live. i feel very comfortable at home. bless

even his fingers are repulsed by him

woman eats a burrito inside train

people insisting on talking on the phone while in subway…

he witchyfied cheetosatan

thats as bad as a thumb ring….. but i get it, he wants to channel confidence.

Mamdani and his pointer finger ring eeeeekkkk

whats up, nothing, whats up w u, nothing. cool. cool… yeah…

distractions.

they’re literally like ‘lets remove all the information that incriminates me and when thats done we can release it’ —- biiitccccchhhhh

also if i hear anything epst. related, ill explode, unless everyone goes down and ‘u know who’ is sentenced to prison for life and his entire family… otherwise, stfu

people are stupid to believe anything political. politics is literally just a bunch or people lying and deceiving, thats why its called “poly -tick”.

having friends with whom u can only share certain things with, not everything- make me sad

cant wait for this day to be over so i can go home and cry