Large Penis Nick Woltemade

Ultraviolet is one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen

If I had a nickel for every girl I said this to

Man there is just straight up nothing good or enjoyable about Batman and Robin (1997)

Full disclosure, until VERY recently I thought bad bunny was the cash me outside girl

Surviving the Game may have the best cast of any move all time

I predict the Steelers will lose based on my theory that old man Aaron Rodgers can’t win when it’s too cold or too past his bedtime and this game is both.

I think I have found the most boring move in the world and it is Halloween: the curse of Michael Myers

It’s getting rarer and rarer now that I find a band from the 2003-2008 sweet spot that is good and I haven’t heard them before but it happened today and I’m super pumped. Band called Sydney. Released two LPs in 2005 and 2007 and they fucking rock.

“Utah Mammoth” is such a profoundly stupid team name.

The Penguins fucking suck

The Utah goalie is Tim Curry’s character in Congo

Watching Phish like:

I thought this was your mom @lifeontiptoes.bsky.social

The Penguins are bad but at least they’re not boring bad (looking at you, Steelers)

Does Utah have a player named after every Spanish Love Songs album?

What a goal Corey Matthews

Looks like Dan Burn might be out for an extended period of time. Eddie Howe is probably just gonna forfeit those games. Not sure he can submit an XI without BDB in it. Not sure he knows it’s allowed.

Everyone DM me your exact location and I’ll be around to murder you in the order in which your DMs were received. Please be patient. I’m only one man and this is my first killing spree.

Newcastle United have 3 problems: 1. We can’t beat a press 2. We can’t unlock a team that sits back 3. There is no other way for an opponent to defend

This team fucking sucks. We deserve to lose. We deserve to be bottom half of the league.

There’s something deeply wrong with Newcastle United. This just isn’t the same team as the past few years. It’s so bad to watch. Idk what exactly is wrong or what exactly is the solution but it’s all wrong.

If Newcastle United doesn’t win today I will kill you all

It’s time.

Hahahaha

Penguins stink man. Idk how yinz watch 82 of these

Oh baby if the Pens lose this game or even let it go to overtime …….

Watched “wake up dead man” today and thought it was excellent. Even better than glass onion. If his movies keep improving at this rate, his next one is going to be so good I die from watching it

Marie tried to get trick me into saying that I think Eva Green is hot but this isn’t my first rodeo and the furthest I went is admitting she’s not unattractive.

Having a backup striker who in mid-December has two goals in all competitions isn’t so bad Paying £125 million for him is tho.

She was sleep for about an hour of the movie

Marie is watching this Taylor swift thing and an episode of dragon ball z broke out

I think if you’re gonna make a list of singers who look the least like their voices, that list has to start with John Darnielle and Jordan Dreyer from La Dispute

You know how like, when a trade happens with your team and so you go to the other teams subreddit to see their fans reaction to losing the player you’re acquiring? If you’re an oilers fan, stay off the Penguins subreddit today. It’s like the liberation of East Germany over there.

This is like when we traded Rob Scuderi. I still remember where I was when I heard the news. Felt like Christmas morning.

I have found the movie with the worst music in it and that movie is Pet Sematary Two Clancy Brown rules tho

I fucking hate Newcastle United

The Haunting (1999) is one of the worst and most boring movies I’ve ever seen

Hollow Man (2000) is a bonkers insane movie but honestly much better than I was expecting

Time to watch The Substitute 2 which has maybe the worst opening credits I’ve ever seen. The visuals. The music. My lord. But hey it stars the whitest guy with the blackest name, Treat Williams so I am all in baby boy. The first one with Tom Berenger was elite.

Loltimore

Sounds about right

Got a feeling that a lot of my fellow scene kids woulda found this track pretty cringe but I cannot help but love it. Never heard of it/this band till like last week even tho this EP is from like 2006. Certified banger.

JPJ flag I’m shocked

Omfg

Marie won’t just sit quietly all night while I play this game for 6 straight hours ugh women are the worst

BRUNOLIMPICO

I am once again pessimistic about Newcastle United’s chances in today’s game. It all feels really 0-0