Lowkey missing my husband?

Dude I'd fuck up a pork lotus soup rn.

Every day is a mysterious gift, delivered by a sinister stranger

canon-typical eye fucking

Is it Stockholm syndrome if he’s sexy

Life is short. Tickle a statue. Watch in horror as that statue comes to life. Run from the statue

THAT GUY WHO?! I'M LITERALLY SO NICE :]

🙄

I mean, I'd dress him in pretty red silks and golds but that's for when he feels better.

Huan-ge should eat more.

To all of my clones: I know what you are. I know you have a tummy ache right now. It's our curse.

“Things will probably be normal again soon!” he hoped wistfully for many years

My throat just made the weirdest sound ever known to mankind. Do your throats also like.... make sounds....?

SO NAUSEOUS ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY ANYMORE AHAHAH.

Twirling aggressively in the direction of my haters

Woke up with a headache dehydrated sore throat and it's raining

So, apparently

/ I've been having no appetite for a while i hope I'm fine

untie him!!!!

Oh no! Why is this cutie sad?

me and husband hello

wei ying wait oh no oh god

i hate being awake so early, what possibly am I supposed to do at 5 in the morning? Someone needs to hit me in the head and put me to sleep again—

I know right?! I should resurrect someone.

Grandmaster of demonic cuntynation.

My tummy hurts and I'm about to make it everyone's problem.

Okay but it's still very cutsleeve of me. Now spread your legs—

//i literally had just told myself "yay my belly hasn't hurt for two days" AND NOW IM NAUSEOUS AND IN PAIN AND BARELY SURVIVING ON A WARM BAG ON MY STOMACH

Wouldn't mind that if it's you. Ew that was SOOO cut-sleevey of me.

So can i eat you whole?

Yes. However, you dressing in purple everyday makes it sound funnier.

Hello chat, did you know my blood is purple and not red? That's because I drink wine—

Oh, well, I'm nauseous. That won't stop me.

I definitely put that brick down myself, and who is "we"????

I LOVE this core. HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAAH. I crave alcohol.

Well, fair enough point, I give it to you.

Would you like some too? 🤨

Also, yeah.

When I play the kazoo, I play to win

[Everything you think of is just as real as you make it Now he only focuses on dreams Can you make a thing exist just by focusing on it? / We're like magicians when we dream But we wake up, nothing's different.]

What if!!! What if I turned into a stick bug.

snake back #mdzs #jiangcheng #noodleAU

You 🫵🏻 yes, you. You pmo.

Asscheeks hurt so bad rn I don't even know why

Everyday means everyday in this case