Obsessed with content creators who are like "my secret recipe for low-carb nachos! first, get low-carb tortilla chips" like ok

My impression of a white person meeting an interracial couple: your babies are going to be sooooo beautiful

I love when people are like "the best motivation is revenge" because it's like ok name three things you've accomplished recently

My body is not yet tea but it's deeeefinitely an herbal infusion

One thing about merino wool.... that stuff is INSANE for running... just ran 10k in an old moth-eaten Uniqlo number without getting too cold OR too hot... yes there were sweat icicles hanging off the back of it by the end but STILL....

I don't think I'm better than people who go on vacation to Dubai. I know that I am.

Would it be a normal amount of insane to choose a psychoanalyst with the same name as my accountant

They should get Malala on the Traitors

I got another custom trophy for the winner of my birthday party this year and it's soooooo funny

My plantar fasciitis cured itself.... I am the sole survivor.....

I actually start celebrating my birthday early each year because my one must-have tradition is to buy nice new sheets so I can wake up feeling like a millionaire

Hat jemand dafür eine Empfehlung in Berlin? Hab gestern für zwei Stunden gesucht aber auch könnte nichts reliable entdecken

Need to know which PR keeps signing me up for Ed Sheeran's newsletter and why they've given him the wrong birthday

Went to the club for my annual trend report. Current gay fashion inspiration: -Sorority cowgirl -Literally pirate -chainmail hoods

Objectively funny that Mamdani met his wife on Hinge and they STILL only let users identify their politics as conservative, moderate or "liberal"

Unemployment crisis in Berlin at an all-time high, the gay gym is at 110% capacity on a Friday at 2 pm

It's weird to me when people are afraid of public speaking. Like "I'm just afraid I'll say something stupid". It's like, that never stopped you before?

A friend from college recently reminded me of the time that a group of parents sued the school paper for $4 million dollars because the editors published an article about oral sex in which students agreed to use their government names

My birthday is in a week and a half so I'm setting my intentions for 32. Taking suggestions if you have them

I like weightlifting because I find the idea of repeating something "until failure" unbelievably moving

Celebrating being German by going to a German-language talk and being excessively German (making eye contact with someone as I blatantly cut them in a queue)

This is what checking Instagram Stories feels like

hope this works 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 a promotion 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯

Admittedly I work in tech but one thing that drives me insane is that anytime my colleagues ask for advice in the work Slack, at least three people reply "I asked ChatGPT and..."

A non-comprehensive list of reasons why I swipe left on people in no particular order: weird tattoos, annoying answers, "Moderate", septum ring, lip ring, named Ben, boring answer, tourist

"Perfectionism is ruining my life" then why are you so bad at everything

This is what happens when you replace your copywriters with AI

You can drink one of these in IKEA if you're hungover and ask nicely, in my experience

I am not delusional, in fact I'm famously very lusional

Working in the food industry is so funny, sometimes I'll look up what a colleague does and their job title is like "Strategy - Onions"

Likeability isn't distributed evenly but that doesn't mean it's bad

German politicians: why don't immigrants want to learn German German employers: why aren't immigrants fluent in German Taxpayers in Germany on unemployment: Can I take the German lessons that will help me re-enter the workforce German policies: no

#journorequest has anyone been to Japan?

FYI Microsoft won't read all your mean posts about the Authenticator app but Apple will

One fun fact about me is that I took Italian lessons from Amanda Knox's teacher

"egal ist keine Entscheidung" - are you stupid "das geht gar nicht" - are you that stupid "das weiß ich schon" - why are you stupid

A gay interior design couple just posted a few home shots with "Polysecure" on their bedside table.... it's like watching a relationship open in real time

I'm so ill I'm googling law school again

Is everything about culture ‘actually just downstream from cheap rent (and its disappearance)’, and is it ‘even possible to have a meaningful conversation about cultural criticism that’s not just about that?’ Emily Segal went back to Berlin and it had changed: open.substack.com/pub/nemesisg...

I'm home sick.... on a bank holiday Friday going into a long weekend.... I could CRY

Sudoku.... Omega-3.... Red wine.... Western culture used to spend time and money trying to prevent cognitive decay at an individual level before Gen-AI....

New website coming soon

In the queue to register as unemployed and the girl in front of me has literally six labubus

I've lived in Berlin for way too long, I keep on seeing old colleagues and acquaintances in the Google Reviews for like local parks and the job center

Watching Survivor and there's a therapist as a contestant... can you imagine if your therapist was like "omg girl no not the hat man again 😓 btw I'm going on TV for 5 weeks see you then 🫶"

I find a lot of sweet foods dark and insidious. What the fuck is a chimney

Oh you're a copywriter? Name

A bit late but I found the drink of the summer: store-brand sugar-free citrus soda with the juice from half a grapefruit

There's a lot of cool stuff you can ask people if you're struggling to connect with them, for example "what's wrong with you"

Lifting at sunrise while listening to Ones and Tooze... I'm your boyfriend now...