Still trying to come up with a name for the webcomic... Also, I'm not sure where I'm going to host it. I'll look into hosting it on my website, but I'm thinking of also hosting it on Tumblr & Webtoon?

Oh yeah, I'm on Instagram now! Mostly just because I needed one to apply to VGen because I don't want to use the stupid bird app — you can follow me there at www.instagram.com/arukanavt ~ I post art, and will also probably post reels at some point :3

Got page 4 of my webcomic done! We're slowly but surely inching towards having the first full chapter :3

I fucking LOVE historically functional fantasy swords 😭💖

Seriously, on top of everything else I'm getting sick again‽ I hope I'm not out for longer than a week this time...

WIP I'll be working on this art in stream if you want to come hang out in chat! www.twitch.tv/calistobezhig

Ok, I've more or less made it so I'll only see political content if I seek it out. I do still feel kind of bad for doing this, but I think it is necessary for my ability to exist properly. I feel a sense of overwhelming dread not being able to check the news, but I'll have to get used to it.

Fuck it, I'm getting far too depressed and my brain can't take it anymore. I am purging political content from my YouTube feed by making a new brand account to watch on. I still plan to get involved in local Minnesota politics in some way, but this constant stream of news is tearing me to pieces.

Trying to find a name for my webcomic's mc and I'm SO FUCKING BAD WITH NAMES 😭

As a relatively new Minnesotan, I'm saddened about Tim Walz stepping down — he wasn't perfect, but he was a great governor and made this state one of the few I felt safe living in. I'm extremely anxious about the future of our state, and I hope a clear DFL leader emerges soon.

Have a pout

I'm actually really proud of my webcomic art so far — I feel like I just unlocked a potential I never knew was there. I almost feel like a fully-fledged artist now! I'd say I'm about 10% of the way there in terms of having the 2 chapter backlog

My more formal way of writing apparently gets mistaken for AI quite often. My solution: using obscure punctuation marks! Specifically, I'm using the interrobang (‽) now, as well as irony marks (⸮). I'll try to find others that exist in Unicode — I'm a nerd and find this very fun lol.

I just realized — I can draw characters extremely reliably, as long as they are from a certain pose. When drawing from 3/4ths and side profile, I haven't "failed" to draw a character in a long time, and that's actually incredible progress.

I'm so insanely shy & awkward when reaching out to people 👉👈 why am I like thiiiis 🥺

I wish I could join #VGen so badly... Genuine question — do you think my art is good enough to apply, or should I focus on improving my skills and apply next year? Please be honest, I promise you won't hurt my feelings 💚

I have a much more realistic set of goals for the new year 💖 these include: - Quitting soda by the end of 2026 - Drawing at least once per day - Completing and releasing Disparate Skies - A full return to streaming I think this is a good set of goals that I can actually complete ☺️

2025 was a very intense year for me. We've been through so much, and there were times where I didn't see a path forward — but on this night, I head into the unknown with a smile. I will carry the pain of last year within me, but I will not let it paint the future. Happy new year everyone 💖

Hah, I did literally NOTHING on this checklist. Well, I guess I should be more realistic next year 🤷‍♀️ Also, I suppose attempts were made — we just fell short on all of them, and there were several factors that contributed to that.

Broke the yt shorts habit briefly to go back to doom scrolling — I'll take the yt shorts anyday...

Sorry if any bad/negative posts appeared and disappeared today — suffice to say I'm feeling pretty dismal about the future. It's not time to give up though, not yet. Even though I don't feel it, things can get better. It's not necessarily going to happen — nor is it likely — but it's possible.

Merry (late) Christmas everyone — I forgot to post something on Bluesky, but yesterday was alright

Here's a pic of my Christmas tree 🎄💖 it's a wonder that we got it inside the house

At this point, the only reason I haven't deleted my twitter is because I would have to log back in to do that

It's so funny to me when people try to paint Minnesota as some horrifying wasteland; the public services here are amazing, people are SUPER friendly, and I've been happier & felt safer here than any other state I've lived in. And that's saying something considering our winters 🥶

So I got run over by a pickup truck. I got incredibly lucky, though I've got a shoulder injury that's gonna be there my whole life, and right now am dealing with pretty bad lasting concussion symptoms. So uh, figured I'd explain it since I'm on the verge of *maybe* recovering enough to steam soon.

Saw the Trans-Siberian Orchestra last night with my mom. I really liked the music, though the heavy use of AI imagery was very disappointing. That being said, I'm feeling really inspired to write more orchestral rock pieces now! Things are so busy here though, so it'll probably have to wait lol.

Leaving for NJ in a few hours — wish me luck 💖 I really want to see my mom and pupper, but I'm really going to miss my partners and kitty and other pupper 🥺 I'm taking my laptop with me, so I'll probably still be kinda active :3 might even stream?

I want to be tiny and cute 🥺

I just casually went outside in a fairly light dress in 23°F weather... I guess I'm a certified Minnesotan now ❄️ Seriously, my cold tolerance has shot through the roof since moving here lol

Once again gonna try to clamp down on the negative posts — its not good for me or anyone else. Basically, my new rule is: if putting it out in the open isn't constructive or helpful to me or others, then there's no point in doing so

I was playing a public piano at a Costco today and someone complimented my playing 🥹 thank you, sorry I'm so awkward with complements but that absolutely made my day 👉👈

Had my first caffeine pill today, never again. I'm so jittery and uncomfortable no matter what I'm doing. It's like around 10% of that horrible episode of Akathesia I got after being given Droperidol in the hospital.

Just scrolled up through my old community discord server, and I can't stop crying. I really miss how active we used to be and how much we used to talk to people back then. How amazing our community was. It's only been 3 years, but I feel 10 years older than back then. I'm so worn down...

Damn near passed out on stream today. Gotta remember to eat protein & stuff

I forgot that noise suppression on OBS takes out some of my higher range — that's why I sound inaudible half the time on stream. I'm in a position again to stream with no noise suppression, so I'm gonna do that going forward!

I've said this a billion times, but I'm so sorry I haven't been around for so long and so inconsistently. I miss hanging out with y'all, and hopefully I can get myself to a point where I can be more active. I'm going to set days where I force myself to socialize, and hopefully that will help 💖

TODAY!

Black Cat Ester update (Chapter 2, Page 10) www.webtoons.com/en/canvas/bl... #webtoons #indiecomics #webcomics #webtoon #blackcatester #fantasy

Did the stream and it went pretty well 💚 That said, I kinda had a bit of a breakdown and ended up oversharing a bit, so I unlisted it for now. My memory of those moments is foggy, but I might re-list it after watching through it.

Fuck it; I'm feeling really depressed and hopeless rn, and usually streaming helps with that, so I'm gonna do a random stream in an hour or so. Don't know what I'm gonna do, but probably just hang out and draw or something

I wish I could work a job so badly. If it was work from home, I could probably manage 20+ hours per week. It's just that I'm not good enough at any of my skills to use them professionally. That's one of the reasons I'm really pushing at learning instead of creating right now

Got clocked as trans by a cis ally when I was out shopping. They were nice and supportive, which was welcome in this political climate. That being said, suddenly having that pointed out in public kinda made me uncomfy — especially since passing is a matter of safety. Now my dysphoria is flaring up

Just spent like 2 hours trying to get my car parked. Finally succeeded, though it got damaged in the process. Minnesota winters are no joke ❄️

Might start a commission drive for a snowblower... It's very hard for us to keep up with shoveling, and this is looking to be a certified Minnesota Winter™

Ngl, there's a part of me that does want to show my face sometimes and do occasional IRL stuff. I mean, I pass well enough that every time I go to the doctor I get asked about pregnancy, so that logically shouldn't be an issue. Buuuut there are still just too many things I hate about myself so nope

I love how when I look for reference images, all I see is AI slop... I literally have to come up with character designs from scratch now and its so frustrating...

There was a 40min long recording on my phone from when I ate too many brownies and I just listened to it. It was an entire nonsense musical I improv'd. My favorite quote has to be "You think you stand a chance? I have turned entire realities into potatoes and planted them in the cosmic grounds!"

Are you ready to have some fun? THIS FRIDAY! 9pm EST Don't miss it!

Close up of a snowflake I got ❄️ I didn't know my phone's camera was this good