The end of this whole damned thing might be The Midas Plague. Put them in the basement and ignore them.

i am never mad at gelatin molds; they are absolutely the cubic zirconia of food. or one of them. aspics and molds were, until industrialized gelatin production, a high-skill, difficult preparation which was exemplary at preserving cooked foods. middle class cooks imitate the forms of the aspics...

I feel extremely strongly that any time in an airport that is not spent getting onto or off of an airplane is time I would rather spend somewhere else other than an airport. If however you must do this I suggest rock climbing walls with outlets at the top. People love to charge stuff at the airport.

the blind leading the naked. in a fucking circle. forever.

Man it was a school night and I was little. Thurman Munson? That I remember, I was in finast on 95th and 3rd and the manager announced it on the pa. I didn't know it but it was the last year I played baseball in the summers. Next year was the first beach year for us. No more city summers.

I'm not a huge conspiracy inventor but I can't help wishing the Tarantino-Dano-Lillard thing is a huge work; they've already shot small but crucial roles in whatever he's doing next and it'll be hilarious when it drops. I know it's like sb-zero possiblity but it would be hilarious.

Picture of me and the staff who operate my Bluesky account.

no one leaves home unless home is the mouth of a shark you only run for the border when you see the whole city running as well (The opening of "Home" by Warsan Shire)

I'm named for my dad, who's named for his uncle Jim. His uncle Jim was amazing at playing the accordion and doing chin-ups. He got good them at after losing most use of his legs to polio. If uncle Jim were alive he'd never stop slapping these people. And it would hurt, what with his strong arms.

This is definitely the campiest administration ever. Like soulless evil camp with nothing but curdled want at its core.

I mean what killed the station wagon was the minivan. I love a good wagon but a minivan was a million times better for my kids than wagons were for me growing up.

This entire administration has enormous skidmarked undies energy. This is not by any means the entire substance of my objections to them but it definitely starts there.

I'm choosing to shop where my children's identities and the lives of my friends and family aren't window dressing to be discarded when things get tough. They were a slightly less awful Walmart. Now they're an equally awful Walmart. Caping for big box retail isn't a good idea for your soul.

...as always, it's completely reasonable to ignore every word before "but." I hope he didn't strain hisself picking up his ball and going home.

you leave the house and meet an unclear interlocutor, he's the unclear interlocutor. you leave the house and everyone is an unclear interlocutor...

With pie season momentarily suspended it seemed like a good day for a lemon chiffon coffee crunch cake. My pal bought me a slice in echo park last time I was out west and I've learned how to come close enough to save airfare.

Hey David Brooks remember when tea party guys showed up at obama's appearances fully strapped? Go fuck yourself you cradle-robbing bitch.

I've barely started and I've said this many times but the next time I host Thanksgiving it's pernil and go home if you don't like it. So many root vegetables. So much baking.

I'm respectful of the effort that went into Pluribus and I gave it four episodes. If it's some kanamit thing it's cookbook time. But there is no nemesis right now but Carol imo. And A Misanthrope's Journey is not really my thing. I know not every protagonist is a hero but I'm really lost with her.

If you're brining a turkey, a fun piece of trivia is that tractor supply's buckets are food grade.

You say I need a job, I've got my own business You want to know what i do? None of your fucking business

The slender man stabber is a better fugitive than Jair Bolsonaro. Globally we gotta elect people who have like gone to a bar or cafe, used hand tools and gone to the store to buy something in their adult lives.

"I just wanted to be racist, not poor!" they cry

Turkey is good. There are a very limited number of times during the year that I need a 15+ pound piece of animal protein on the table. That's all it is.

A movie that takes place where *I'm* from? There is only one correct answer.

My sister's children, both east coast surfers, are following long-established practice among their peers and doing two years at the city college in Santa Barbara, at which point, with a decent gpa and an associates, they can finish a bachelors at UCSB. Rent is insane, but tuition is so reasonable.

I remember when there was a discussion on Twitter about Shein's manufacturing practices and some apologists invented all sorts of fantastical machinery and technology to avoid facing the more horrifying truth. Reminds me of this comedian's joke. IG bscomedian

Look I will be honest it's not too difficult to roast a turkey well & have it be enjoyable...but it is far easier to not lecture people who are understandably disinterested in rolling the dice on a fifteen pound animal protein centerpiece (that can go wrong!) about their choice being a skill issue.

I know I sound like a puppy here but I'm starting to think that deeply immoral men teaching systems that are amoral but have moral effects is a pretty bad mistake. I'm not angry at mere hypocrisy- but Summers is deeply wicked and that smears everything he touches with that wickedness.

Apparently the other 4D of the 5D chess the democrats are playing are simply not visible to the non-elect. Love my esoterica-based political party. It's almost like being Catholic again!

Every so often the big dog busts through the door and we get some lookie lous.

So America's most afflicted tick sufferer and president of the NYT in-house GK Chesterton Fan Club has taken the time this morning to best-case the entire Epstein thing. Maybe the Times should hire more women or something. Fuckin Catholic converts man, they are super special.

Man I think it really is just all adolescent-level impulse control, legal speed and crippling thanatophobia for these guys.

I am so glad we've emerged from the olden times and don't have to worry about like the bentshank king being deposed by a nephew born with tertiary syphilis who lives for twenty eight days but starts a war that lasts a century over rat pelts. So glad our guys went to college and wear suits & stuff.

Category is 100% "FIRST THINGS YOU REACH FOR IN THE MORNING" or I don't have a BFA from a state school.

Democrats are playing one dimensional chess and shit.

I learned very late in life that advent calendars have treats of any kind in them. My aunt Peg, who was probably 10 at the time, made my mom and dad a felt calendar with a tree silhouette on top. Every day you'd unpin a small illustration she'd cut out of a magazine from a day & pin it to the tree.

"...and remember it's not the dog in the fight, it's the fight in the dog. With that let's please welcome Senator Schumer!"

to those who celebrate etc.

Man, I didn't vote hard enough again.

Leaving aside their amoral abandonment of principles and focusing just on shopping? Unlock the shampoo. Unlock the deodorant. I wouldn't be smiling either if my whole job was to unlock the detergent jail every time someone needed tide. (Also? the amorality is 100% not helping.)

One of the big problems with this is that his supermarkets suck shit and people outside of the city don't fuck with shitty supermarkets. I swear my dirt bag supermarkets in the Hudson valley are literal palaces in comparison to the best in Brooklyn.

Honestly after the whole Jared Fogel thing and with the 5 dollar footlong now costing $7.50, I bet Subway will take the dub here. Congrats guys better news than usual.

can see no possible problem here, soldiers are notoriously easygoing about being paid and fed.

I do declare, these pale sweaty bestubbled Catholic converts really and truly do take the entire cake.

Sure, NOW this motherfucker is up on current events.

Honestly only want to read news in this format moving forward.

My favorite weird space jam thing is I worked with a commercial editor who cut a tie-in tv spot. Production was delayed so the spot wasn't going to be finished by end of year and (details hazy and complicated) they were obligated to air a version of it by 12/31. (Contd)

I mean another way to think about it is I'm not sure the cows are obligated to share their impressions of the abbatoir in addition to being cut up for profit. "But it's not gen ai it's..." Doesn't matter. Don't care. Not worth it in any way.

I'll ride the mower in circles for hours chopping up leaves before I'll ever pick up a goddamned rake. Only thing I hate worse is digging postholes. And going in my particular crawl space. And when snakes are sleeping between the panels in a garage door and get chopped in pieces. And the chainsaw.