I spent months agonising over getting out of Twitter and never regretted it once I did it. Facebook though, something else, there's family involved. Think this is my last post there though.

Top 15 programmes of all time, as of this morning? Hancock's Half Hour Steptoe & Son Father Ted Monty Python's Flying Circus A Bit of Fry & Laurie Absolutely Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin Early Doors The Thick of It Still Game The Sweeney 15 Storeys High Colin's Sandwich The Office The Prisoner

Just been to see this show from @mikewozniak.bsky.social. Absolutely brilliant. Hilarious and enthralling stuff. I won't sleep tonight, not until I've solved the mystery.

Great. Having a nice pint in a beer garden, and what's that I see? A dog on a lead, wandering about. He's causing no harm. Hang on, he's just shat over the said lead.

Post a better subject for a biopic named "Michael". #BetterMichaelFilms

Weren't those girls in the Vengaboys dancing with Lou Bega half an hour ago?

God, this #TOTP from 17th September 1999 is AWFUL. These acts remind me of those terrible "best unsigned bands around" they used to have on Craig Charles' Funky Bunker.

Good. Some of us still remember what she did during the pandemic. Didn't give a shit for those that might be affected by her actions. She was there at the big anti-lockdown demo at the Sennedd with Nev Wilshire, a couple of weeks before he died of Covid. Fuck off. share.google/bq7a08ijZVnQ...

Yep. In fact, on what issue has Trump actually won during his first 16 months in power? Nothing. What a LOSER. www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...

In next Friday's soaraway edition of the New York Times International, "Can Kurdistan Fried Chicken survive without Kurdistan?"

Well, as long as you've got your priorities settled

Just had a nightmare about when Wilfried Bony fancied himself as a bit of a style guru.

One of my team has just asked me if I'm going to the Christmas Dinner this year youtube.com/clip/Ugkxk73...

One of the first AI-generated pucs I saw - well, this and the pensioner who'd knitted a giant woolly cat - and probably still the best. Happy Maundy Thursday.

Starmer had said it. "It is increasingly clear that... our long-term national interest requires closer partnership with our allies in Europe and with the European Union". The Road Back begins here.

"Tell them to get me a 40-year-old scorcher. And do use that word. " youtu.be/ih1Ddy9yMWE?...

housing is more expensive now, but also a lot safer. this kind of home was considered cream of the crop in the 1980s

Just been watching Alfie (2004). Went to the cinema to watch that when it was out. Wasn't bad. Couple of years later, a young lady in the No Sign Bar said to me, "Problem with you, you think you're fucking Alfie, you do". I said, rather breezily, "Thank you very much!"

You know, I love Julia Roberts. Great actress, and I've been besotted with her since I was 21. She's going to be 60 in no time and she's still astonishingly beautiful. But I can't watch Notting Hill. Even with Julia Roberts in it, it is too fucking twee.

BBC News - Paperboy, 79, says he'll carry on delivering until he can't walk - BBC News www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

I've got no stake in this, I couldn't care less either way. But I've just seen Mikel Arteta's gyrations at the side of the pitch vs Everton, and all I can think is, "For fuck's sake, you're in your mid-forties, have some fucking dignity".

13 years ago, I sat in band practice, thinking how lucky I was to be doing something so exciting while everyone in work would be stuck in front of the tv. Tonight, I thank the Lord that it's off tonight, I don't have to rehearse any tired old shite and can sit at home watching Rumpole of the Bailey.

And we sure as fuck ain't dealing with Franklin D Roosevelt.

Yep, that's pretty much it.

The world has changed since the turn of the Century. Just witness the difference between Snoop Dogg's arrival at the Swansea.Com last night...

The Professionals were out in the All Action Almera in 1996

Cherie Blair said something interesting in The Tony Blair Story, and that was that she advised him to ensure that Gordon Brown wasn't the only name in the frame to succeed him. All today's problems can be traced back to the day Blair stood down. Brown was a brilliant Chancellor, but as a leader...

I've got to this age, and so many of my friends are as thick as shit it's embarrassing. It was fine when they were blabbing on about motorbikes, but now they're telling me I should get into crypto and going on about right wing politics as if they have the first idea what they're talking about.

Those cheap bastards who want to rip off the sellers on A Place In The Sun always say the same thing: "We're going to put in a cheeky offer". Well I'd be giving them a cheeky refusal: "Fuck off, lol". Cheap bastards.

I hate poems. Not Keats or Wordsworth or any of those fellows; no, I mean the sort of shite people make up for when you're leaving a job or getting married. "And now it's time for you to go, I think we all agree, La la la la la la la la De de de de de" Shite.

It's amazing. I've been arguing with people on Facebook the last week or two about their gammon views, R*f**m, that kind of thing. I started off with reasoned debate, but lately I'm just saying that they're uneducated idiots. Not one of them has retorted. It's almost as if they don't actually exist.

It's been 25 years and the poor sod's dead now, but I still can't get over Darius's rendition of Baby One More Time. How could he possibly have thought, "This is a great idea, I definitely won't regret this." I mean, he won in the end, he got his break while the band turned to shite. But still.

Post a banger that isn't in English youtu.be/SrGLSmu9ezs?...

I've spent ages, every time my band has a gig, knocking out a poster. One of the lads has found a new AI app on Facebook. My services no longer required on that front. It's on on the band page already. Here's a pic of the guitarist, with someone else's ears, wearing his Trojan tee-shirt with pride.

This doesn't half feel like a Dan Miller resignation. www.theguardian.com/politics/202...

Just spoke to a geezer outside who's doing some work on next door's house. Loads of apparatus, whacking and fitting stuff. Then I went inside to a Teams meeting where I talked about setting the scene for a Team Awayday next week. What a waste of a life.

It's been pissing it down for months. Last year the same, and the year before. It's almost as if those goons who kept banging on about climate change were right.

Hit me Paul Shane one more time

People on Bluesky vs people at the other place

Four fictional characters who would definitely defect to Reform

What a terrific bargain! Although I'm not sure I've ever seen a Man United triple Adidas shirt before, or one sponsored by Snapdrsgon. And who's that team being sponsored by Stnndard Chartered?

There's a chap at my mother's care home who, as well as having advanced dementia and mobility issues, has Tourette's. It was his birthday on Saturday, and his present to himself was shouting, "Fucking slappers" for half an hour. Well, you've got to be good to yourself. Happy birthday, Phil.

The promo is already top notch:

Why do all Frasier Crane's dates wear the same clothes? Honestly, Seattle must have cornered the world in grey slacks and colourful ribbed v-necks.

I can't remember seeing Ricky Jones Deo advertising Oxo in the early noughties.

Yet another glorious day outside.

And the worst? Millions will disagree, but the syrupy shark-jumping bollocks that was the final episode of Only Fools And Horses, clearly aimed at drawing tears from their audience, it was sheer crap. And then they dug up that dead smelly old horse a few years later to flog it again anyway.

There was Blackadder Goes Forth and Still Game, both of which showed a world after the characters had died. I still think this was the best though. Not a single laugh in the final two minutes. Didn't need it. youtu.be/hP21b-AAXJk?...

It's taken six and a half years, but I've just had a very friendly word in my ear about maybe, in future, not referring in a meeting to the people that populate our great country as "ignorant, dishonest cattle". I shall not cease from mental fight, nor shall my sword sleep in my hand...

Well... we ended up with a band made up of 3 of us and 2 of another band. Just that. It was great. We did 23 songs, including 8 I'd never sung before. I even did a solo acoustic version of Thank You For The Music to three adoring circles of women. Now THAT is Rock n' Roll. And two gigs lined up.