When you stand too close to the oven when you open it

40 years ago we’d have congressional hearings falsely accusing metal bands of putting backwards messages in their songs that told kids to kill themselves & now we have a planet-killing chatbot that’s all like “bet you won’t commit suicide chickenshit bitch” & the government is like here’s $5 billion

Incredible

Fuck AI, man. What the fuck. www.cnn.com/2025/11/06/u...

My hottest take is that Near Dark is better than The Lost Boys.

The thought of being pregnant filled me with such existential body horror that I barely had space to consider how terrible a mom I'd be on top of that. Kids deserve to be wanted and provided for 100%. They need parents with patience I lack. I never regretted my bi-salp. Fun Aunt Forever!

I've always thought about a horror comedy set in a hospital/vet clinic because those are two places you'd see a random blood splatter and go "God damn idiots, clean up after yourselves...". No one would notice there's a killer for like an hour MINIMUM

Time for a new pinned post! I have TWO WHOLE titles now, look at meee! Please check these out and make sure to tell other people if you liked them. I want to inflict my madness on many, many humans. #horrorsky #writesky #indiehorror #indieauthor #comedyhorror

ALRIGHTY. @tea-and-mushrooms.bsky.social I know you were looking forward to this and I have FINALLY gotten my shit together. I decided this story needed a silly art gimmick and that made everything take longer. SOUR DOE is officially available. (eBook coming soon, will add link)

The great beast's bowl is empty. He laments.

*spits coffee*

And this is why Del Toro is one of my favorite directors. Excellent movie.

@joshuafrantic.bsky.social Dude these are COMFY you were right. Excellent purchase from @rodeopunkparade.com

You know, I don't actually mind if someone on SNAP buys candy or a special treat or a delicious, healthy meal that's "fancy". I don't mind if people get medical care when they need it regardless of wealth, citizenship, etc. I may be a cryptid but I'm not a fucking *monster*.

This is who runs this account

A movie you've seen more than 7 times with a gif:

This was my first ever text game and I had a lot of fun! Check it out, friends :D

My buddy met Tom Savini today and got his autograph for me 🥺

Y'all, play this game. Then read alllllll his books. They're great!

youtu.be/3OrHy_TRudo?... These glorious men only know how to produce bangers

Hurricane Melissa has sustained winds of 180mph. For reference, one of the worst to ever hit my state, Hurricane Andrew, had sustained winds of 145mph. But sure. The climate isn't changing. Fucking hell. Jamaica, you're in my thoughts.

#HorrorWritersChat Oh no, lmao. It's Kyle. He is my favorite character so far because he's just a delight to write. He is a poorly socialized cat of a man who made his unresolved grief everybody else's apocalyptic problem. If he is visiting me, that means he's done something stupid again.

#HorrorWritersChat Sour Doe (still not out yet, blegh, I've been so sick this month) is my love letter to Creature Features. Think Slither, Boar, Tremors, and Prophecy (the eco horror, not the popular one lol) for vibes.

#HorrorWritersChat I really love Scrivener. My parent was Dropbox so I can basically get what Google docs used to offer me. I like that I can organize my books chapter by chapter and view them in standalone tabs instead of scrolling through pages and pages and pages. Third tool:

#HorrorWritersChat Hello you lovely weirdos! It's Michelle Heller, writer of weird and funny nonsense involving body, cosmic, and grief horror. I would say my perfect writing room is just that. I dream of having my own space in my house. Love the man to death but he is distracting. 🤣

10 movies to get to know my taste Hoo boy. Only 10?! Here's 11, because I'm a rebel.

All of this. Do not risk telling the fascists exactly who you are and where you'll be. Just know where they are. And bring your best frog suit.

As of yesterday, my dad's been gone for six years now. Because he'd never want me moping about him, a funny story: Once he was getting ready to leave at a weird time of day. I asked him, "Where are you going?" And he said, "Insane, wanna come?" We went to KFC. 🤣

Define your music taste with 8 artists? Challenge level: Impossible Mine's...really all over the place. This doesn't even scratch the surface 🤣 Mindless Self Indulgence The Narcissist Cookbook Ghost Electric Callboy Rush Berried Alive Four Stroke Baron ONICKS

I want to thank everyone for sharing and donating to this. It means the world to all of us. Please continue to spread this around if you have the time <3

Hey friends! Now that I have a moment I'd like to share my friend's GoFundMe again. There's been an unfortunate update and she could really use all the help she can get. The full story is in this link, but I'll do a TL;DR here. 🧵

#HorrorWritersChat I think I lean towards desperation. The supernatural plays a role, but the concept of doing everything you can and STILL not getting out of it always has the most tension.

#HorrorWritersChat I write popcorn horror, mostly. I'm looking to entertain and spook everyone that may enjoy my brand of weird. Sometimes my characters are well off because it's nice to live vicariously, lol. Other times it's more close to home. It depends on what I need for the story :B

#HorrorWritersChat Hmmmm. I'm not sure it does. I actually don't think a lot about theme when I write. I'm a pantser lol. There's definitely deprivation/scarcity of safety for all of my poor characters. They usually survive. Usually.

#HorrorWritersChat Heya pals, it's Michelle Heller from The Swamp! I write mostly comedy horror but that's just by chance. I love all horror. I am one bad day away from having nothing and it's wearing on me, friends. I feel guilty about feeling bad because so many have it worse. So I just carry on.

They pumpkin spicing the dongs now

Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves. One for practice and the other one is the "main" grave.

Horse Girl stories are the gateway drug to Monsterfucking

The Gravastar K1 Mercury Pro is a sexy, sexy keyboard

I bought a game on Steam that gives achievements whose icons are just letters of the alphabet and various symbols. My profile is now perfect.

If you see this post a random picture from your device without explaining it 🤣

#WritingLifeMonthly Finding the time 😭 I wish I could recover from my work week AND write. But no. My Potato Time just eats into my Productivity Time. Is anyone wins the lottery, consider adopting me 🤣

Why do these dipshits look like Batman villains from Wish? Got The Puffin, The Questioner, and Two-Bit over here lmao

@martinshannon.bsky.social 🤣🤣

🤣🤣 I am attacked

World Mental Health Day.

#HorrorWritersChat You weren't sure where the sound came from at first; not until it continued enough to lure you to a magnificent tomb. Intricate statues carved into the structure stared at you with lifeless, rough eyes, one reaching out. The last thing you remember is taking its hand.