Every year I watch Emmet Otter's Jugband Christmas and every year I come a little bit closer to understanding furries

you have to work the job to get the money to pay the bills to have the internet to use the phone to watch the cute pig videos. a never ending treadmill

fawll

I’m finally ready to say the quiet part out loud: I like eating food and seeing my friends.

Time to retire these guys. They served valiantly 🫡

I'm locked out of my twitter account so I guess I'm stuck here now. Woo.

Time 2 Switch twitch.tv/dorkcube7000

Layoffs hitting my workplace so hard the coffee machine is being escorted out the building 💀

Join us as we head to the G20 summit to see if potus Viola Davis can single-handedly fend off Homelander to save 19 other world leaders (and maybe also the entire world economy!) in... Amazon Prime's "G20"!

2025 is the year I unsubscribe from all these goddamn marketing emails

Little chicken dumps

EXCLUSIVE: First look at Wario Land 6 for the Nintendo Switch 2!

Friend told me they're a 10 minute walk away from a zoo with apes The nearest zoo for me is 1 and a half hour drive away

I'm embarrassed to admit... I finally understand dipping pizza in ranch

Just found out I'm getting laid off in 2 months. Some of my coworkers got laid off effectively immediately. Fuck.

They should invent gum that doesn't make the worst noise in the world when you chew it

Sometimes, when you're feelin real low, you gotta bust out the Giant Bomb E3 2017 videos and remind yourself that life can be good 🙂 @jeffgerstmann.com www.youtube.com/watch?v=8v0n...

Oh no Spotify has pinned me as a train nerd I mean I'll listen to it but I'm def not a train nerd, nope 😶

Dunkin is closed today, local coffee shop is closed today, McDonald's coffee tastes like a double shot of ass. So I got Sheetz coffee today. The *sweetest* coffee I have ever tasted, shit is gonna turn me into daffy duck.

STOP THE COUNT !

My only experience with Elder scrolls before I played Morrowind was Skyrim. So when I first saw the silt striders I was just in awe and surprised that something that cool doesn't show up in every entry after that.

god i love him

It's a valentine's miracle!

Thinking about hypnospace again. Really one of the best pieces of period fiction and it's not even real world history.

Guess this is an ongoing thread now cus look what I just found. Strawberry Arnold Palmer. I swear, they made this product just for me. 11/10

But they *are* open on saturdays

Been doing a Spotify jam with coworkers made up of everyone's music and we jumped the shark when this one played from my algo (someone skipped it right after I took this screenshot 🥲)

2nd place at bar trivia (and then 3rd place after a tie breaker 😭)

wow, straight

Been craving a strawberry lemonade this entire week and it turns out the lemonade place is closed on Sundays

Had a brain blast and now I'm writing up a homebrew campaign for a DnD game that will never happen 😵‍💫

What do you do when your vice president dies? If you’re President Jeff Bridges, you nominate Joan Allen! And what does Joan Allen do when some orgiastic photos surface, threatening to derail her confirmation? She goes high when they go low! Maybe a little too high…

I've got to buy these crates I've got to buy these crates These crates These crates I need more crates

Live twitch.tv/dorkcube7000

I'm choosing to be happy today. Someone send me cute cat pics or sumn

The new Wallace and gromit is a hate-letter to AI Hell yeah

Live twitch.tv/dorkcube7000

Open face breakfast sandwich: eggs, Italian sausage, bacon, cheddar (mixed with little American), hash brown, on a slice of sourdough.

Things to say during a breakup: "We are done-yon rings" "It's so over and we will never be so back" "You really hurt me, Michelle. And I just don't think you can change, not in a way that will undo this hurt. I'm sorry." "Call me the Equalizer cus I am Done-zel Washing-done!"

Bro what do I even post here. I got no drafts page to store up bangers.

My siblings been leaning so hard into this joke about me wanting a milf that I swung too hard the other way and they think I'm asexual. What

TF2 comic 7 thoughts: boy they really just wanted to wrap it all up, huh? I mean fair enough, if it took this long to get 7 then there's no way they were gonna make an 8. But it really just sprints thru the last dozen or so pages to get to a very saccharin sweet ending and I guess I'm okay with that

Time for the yearly watch of Emmet Otter's Jugband Christmas. One thing Im noticing this time around is they really wanted to show off their engineering & puppeteering skills. Puppets in boats, in water, in cars, on bikes, going down slides. Its like slight of hand magic.

If I'm gonna fully invest in bluesky and leave twitter, I need them to change the way timelines work when you open the app. I should be returning to the last post I saw, not the most recent post.