Thus far, the world is telling me no. 🙄 #music #fleetwoodmac

If you see this, post a fictional character you want to be.

The last piece of fiction I wrote to completion was “Down and Out at Taco Bell” last year. Since then, I had an idea for a clone novel that morphed into a bank robbing vampire novel, and then I wrote six pages of a story about a trailer park in Louisiana. So that sucked. #BookSky #WriterSky

People were really like, “Hey great to see you.” “Now get the fuck outta here!” 😂

Now might be a great time for Anonymous to wipe out medical debt and/or student loans. Could you imagine what that kind of relief would do for the morale of the resistance? Eat the rich.

Just heard someone say they like to find vintage watches and set them to the time they were born. My first thought was, “I don’t like myself that much.”

My wife is staying out of town for work this weekend. When did she stop loving me? Is she meeting up with Chris Cornell? How many times will she drunkenly facetime me to ask me to come get her? Will I have white people tacos or Stouffers?

There’s a special pain when you discover someone you find attractive supports evil.

Week 42 of asking for this song to be injected directly into my veins. #spiritbox

Yourself, but as a cartoon

Since I took a BlueSky break: - I published a new poetry collection. - My grandfather died and I stopped talking to my father. - I recorded two new albums. - I watched all of Girls. - I barely wrote any fiction. - Your mom won’t stop texting me. - I didn’t get prettier.

Oh yeah! Y’all were so happy to see me leave too.

I think I’m done with Bluesky. Just a head’s up in case I delete this account in the next 24 hours.

I told my wife the only time I enjoyed exercising was when I was in elementary school chasing girls on the playground, so I suggested if she wants me to exercise she should let me chase her around. She laughed at me. 😔

Dear people who complain about dating apps, You realize you don’t have to use them, right? But some of you are so boring and insufferable you can’t meet people IRL, right? Thanks, Patrick Cinnamon Crotch Attaway

People in America have a hard time believing other countries exist. The government doesn’t want you to die and be replaced by AI. They just don’t particularly care if you live or die. So stop saying shit like “they wanna wipe out the population.” They don’t care enough to do that.

As an ambient musician, poet, and postmodern novelist, I fear the world is never going to be ready for my level of pretentiousness. My self-deprecation also gives people the ick. 🙄

If you have to say you’re intelligent or brag about your intelligence, I don’t know how to break this to you…

Excerpt from one of the first Bukowski poems I read circa 2015: "The Great Lover." #poetry #Bukowski

I just want everyone in my life to speak to me the way people talk to him on The Bear. Is that too much to ask?

I had a nightmare I bought another Firebird. I sold mine in January because it was the most uncomfortable guitar in the world to play.

I never won any major awards, but my niece did call me “da da” before any other male figure in her life.

Dean was probably a freak, though.

I wish Bluesky was more like my last year of undergrad and less like that grad school course where I earned my only B, which probably stood for B O R I N G.

Apparently, even my subconscious loves my wife because I’m married and faithful to her in my dreams.

Me every day in my 30’s.

Sinners had a great cast. Mostly great music. Great take on vampires. Unfortunately, it’s an hour too long and poorly paced. Still better than Wakanda Forever.

Me waiting for Sinners to get good.

When someone stops interacting with me, I assume either they have other things to do or I annoyed them in some way. I’m fine with that because people grow apart for various reasons, and stuff happens. I thought that would be obvious to someone if I stopped interacting with them.

Happy Fourth of July. If you have anything stupid to say today, just look at the fireworks while you’re holding a hot dog and shut up. 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

Redownloaded the Reddit app and made the mistake of reading News headlines.

In junior high school, I used to write direct references in essays to things my teachers would say in class just to see their reaction. Their reaction was to give me a bad grade and act offended. I still did it.

When are scientists going to invent a way to inject a song into my veins?

Just a reminder that this album still slaps. #petergabriel

If we’re going to outlaw arbitrary things, can we ban face smoothing and heavy filters? We can tell when you use them and you look weird.

There’s nothing as depressing as comments from old men on OnlyFans accounts on TikTok and Twitter.

My wife just called me “The lesser of the evils” because I’m still a “boy.”

Y’all need to stop assuming your art is for everyone if your friends/spouses don’t even like it. My wife does not read my books or listen to my music. It doesn’t bother me all that much.

So, question for some of y'all on here: why is it that you only allow yourselves to interact with self-published authors after you've posted a "Pick me!1!!" post begging them to post the links to their books? Real answers only!1!! 😉

I have nine novels. Don't ask me my genre. I am the genre. #BookSky #Writersky #WritingCommunity

Normalize not talking shit about your spouse on social media. Sorry that you’re unable to resolve your conflict in a constructive way and feel like airing it in public.

I know things are bad when someone says “Take me back to 2003.” Really? Iraq War and some of the worst music, movies, and TV series ever?

“Nobody likes you.” But my wife just texted me she wanted to cuddle. “Nah.”

Rewatching Community and forgot all about Troy mentioning butt stuff.

My wife says the real reason people never hit on me is because of my vibe. “When we met, I couldn’t even tell that you liked me until you asked to hold my hand.”

Sharing a message from my friend @zevgood.bsky.social. #Pride2025

If money motivated me at all, I wouldn’t have released nine novels since 2020 and over 60 albums since 2007. Mental illness is surely to blame.

I don’t think Squid Games S03 was bad, but the moral messaging was a little off if In-Ho survived unscathed while Gi-Hun is punished for being a good person. I get that might be more “realistic” per class differences, though there’s little realistic about the show in general aside from the people.

Who has their fingers crossed they get invited to Jeff Bezos’s next wedding?

Is anyone talking about the weird uncanny valley AI baby on Squid Games?