Child: Dad, make me a sandwich. Dad: Poof! You're a sandwich. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

My boss told me that he was going to fire the person with the worst posture. I have a hunch, it might be me. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Sore throats are a pain in the neck! #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Don't trust atoms. They make up everything. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

If this script were a programmer, it would still be debugging hello world. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

How do you tell the difference between a crocodile and an alligator? You will see one later and one in a while. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

I've joined the scarecrow appreciation society. I was a bit apprehensive at first, but they welcomed me with open arms. #dadjokes

Why don't skeletons ride roller coasters? They don't have the stomach for it. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

What’s the advantage of living in Switzerland? Well, the flag is a big plus. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

What's the worst part about being a cross-eyed teacher? They can't control their pupils. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

I’m so embarrassed about accidentally locking myself in a cabinet at the museum. I made a real exhibition of myself. #funny #jokes #dadjokes

"I'm sorry." "Hi sorry, I'm dad" #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Why do wizards clean their teeth three times a day? To prevent bat breath! #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Why are giraffes so slow to apologize? Because it takes them a long time to swallow their pride. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

I’m only familiar with 25 letters in the English language. I don’t know why. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

What did the grape do when he got stepped on? He let out a little wine. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

One of the problems with making a salad is bland lettuce. It’s a problem that needs addressing. #funny #jokes #dadjokes

Scientists finally did a study on forks. It's about tine! #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Some people say that I never got over my obsession with Phil Collins. But take a look at me now. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

How many seconds are in a year? 12. January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd.... etc #jokes #dadjoke #funny

I just got fired from a florist, apparently I took too many leaves. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

What did the ocean say to the beach? Thanks for all the sediment. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

What is a centipedes's favorite Beatle song? I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand... #jokes #dadjoke #funny

What did the dog say to the two trees? Bark bark. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

I gave my friend 10 puns hoping that one of them would make him laugh. Sadly, no pun in ten did. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Why are skeletons so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Just ‘in case’ you needed this 😏 #jokes #dadjoke #funny

I asked a friend how it was going down at the National Ambidextrous Society. He said people are joining left and right.

The great thing about stationery shops is they're always in the same place... #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Why did the fireman wear red, white, and blue suspenders? To hold his pants up. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Well played, bookstore 😂😆

This morning I coughed up a knight, a rook, and a pawn. I think I have a chess infection. #dadjokes

Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don't work. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Why is the new Kindle screen textured to look like paper? So you feel write at home. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Why do birds fly south for the winter? Because it's too far to walk. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

A guy on a tractor just drove past me shouting, 'The end of the world is nigh!' It was Farmer Geddon.

My friend said to me: "What rhymes with orange" I said: "no it doesn't" #jokes #dadjoke #funny

I'd like to start a diet, but I've got too much on my plate right now. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Got a favorite dad joke that always cracks you up? Drop it in the comments! Don't forget to share the laughs far and wide! 🎉🎥😂 #ShareTheLaughter

Hello and welcome to dad jokes! The show where jokes are only jokes when they’re apparent…. You’ll get that one on a sec… but while I have you, check this out 🤣🤣🤣

I have developed a telepathic air freshener. It makes scents when you think about it… #dadjokes

Why does Han Solo like gum? It's chewy! #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Some people eat light bulbs. They say it's a nice light snack. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Why did the belt go to prison? He held up a pair of pants! #jokes #dadjoke #funny

My wife is on a tropical fruit diet, the house is full of stuff. It is enough to make a mango crazy. #jokes #dadjoke #funny

Home Groan Dad Jokes FB #bunnies 🐰🐰

What do you call a boy who stopped digging holes? Douglas. #jokes #dadjoke #funny