they say the average is five inches but i don’t trust it i think there’s inflation going on from from the idk the surgerys or something

oooooooour house is a very very very fine house with soft dicks in the yard they used to be so hard

mmm pierogi

morning

when i first downloaded letterboxd i made it a project to mark every movie id ever seen and i was looking back at it and it and i was astonished that i had seen thousands of films and i was trying to figure out how i had seen so many films

hey… 👉👈

there is something immoral about jelly. jam is pure by comparison

had a dream i threw a party and my subconscious was really stretching for people i would invite to a party

netflix but it’s a building and it shows the movies i want to show

they should do like top surgery but the top is your dome and they take it off

you can post through the pain just keep going

i’ve seen lots of articles about what will happen to like the housing market when all the boomers die but i’m more worried about the broadcast procedural economy. what will happen to ncis, fbi, svu, the chicago ones

i love them

ignore the stains on my shirt it uhh came like that

y’all ever go to a white persons house and you go to their bathroom and check out their shower and they don’t have any washcloths, no loofas, no sponge, nothing? like they’re just lathering with their bare hands

i’m in your wife’s dms sharing fucking recipes

hey guys add me on the contacts app to hear all the sick updates about my cool life

i have got to get more muscular

what even is love tbh

Negative Space. this book is incredible. i had been meaning to read it for a year, then i found it at a used book store. heavy and bleak, don't read if you have a weak stomach. the book is about suicide but that's not the scary part. i read it in four sittings and the last one almost made me sick.

white squirrel

eating a chinese pear

idle hands are the boner's playthings

i’ve never gotten to experience the “it’s not you, it’s me” routine because it actually always has been me

hello friends

thankussy

g’night all

hotel pro tip: do you big nasty room-stinking-upping shits in the lobby

having sex is like driving stick shift. i don’t know how to do it; and if i tried it would not go smoothly

guys you would tell me if i sounded like a girl on the phone right

“black” friday and its the whitest shit you could ever imagine

god never even asked if i wanted a cock but him making it small and not work is a bridge too far

does anybody have any discord servers i could join and become a beloved member of the community

i have a hard time believing the same god who designed boobs also designed the scrotum

making mapo tofu

does anyone want to see my cat

cocks of unusual size

making friends on the net :)

you’re all my best friends in the whole world :3

3D in 2D!

it turns out you can just call people you know and they’ll like tell you what’s going on in their lives

i’m trying so hard to be normal

how does american dad keep getting away with it

sleep

what if i read a book what then

my boy loves a window

cock posture

do you people play video games

good morning usa