“A Diddler on the roof? Sounds crazy, no? But here in our village of Anatevka…”

Can’t take someone named Benson Boone seriously. Those are the names of beagles from the same litter.

Millennials wearing business casual to the club

*Extremely Cole Porter Voice* 🎶It’s delightful, it’s delicious, it’s DiGiorno”🎶

Tell me this is not the love child of Ben Gross and Paxton Hall-Yoshida

Need to hear him say “Luigi Mangione"

So what you’re saying is, the cakes have to hold space for defying gravity?

A millennial who is also somehow in her 90s

A pardon would be Shahmazing

“Mom, I frew up”

Waiting on my mental health diagnosis (Spotify Wrapped)

I think if Joe Biden is your dad, you deserve to have a little crack as a treat.

Being 35 in a musical is so funny because you can be a college freshman, a retired father of seven, or (most realistically) a guy having an existential crisis at his birthday party.

When I tweeted this, I had 18 followers and the Wicked movie was a lie/fever dream so let’s try it again under new circumstances:

I love Wicked because of the fantasy that I, a 35-year-old, could be a college freshmen with other hot 35-year-olds.

RIP, Stephen Sondheim, you would have loved “Wicked” (2024)

Gravity hates to see her coming

🎶becaaaaaaaauuuuuuuse I knew you, I have left x for good🎶💚🩷

Jonathan Bailey is like pure sodium the way he can have explosive chemistry with a glass of water.

BREAKING: Donald Trump has appointed Lydia Tár to direct the National Endowment for the Arts

Gilmore Girls is so funny because what do you mean a Whiffenpoof married a Smith College graduate and neither of them are gay?

We don’t need “leftist Joe Rogan.” We need country-pop to be anti-bootlicker again.

I spent my childhood watching “The Sound of Music” (1965) and “Cabaret”(1972) so I really thought the rise of fascism would have more showtunes.

If I think about it, my favorite genre

Close enough. Welcome back, Bradley Jackson.

“Into the Woods” by Stephen Sondheim and James Lapine

The TV show “Frasier” should have been set in San Francisco rather than Seattle. Especially in the 90s, San Francisco was a better setting for effete wine/food/art/opera snobs. Seattle is is too outdoorsy/casual/grungey.

those cancelled tv shows you’ll never stop thinking about

A CHI hair straightener hates to see them coming

“Monster” (2003) but it’s Charlize Theron, not Julia Roberts

Age Of Innocence (1993) is the best Scorsese and I will die on this hill

Carol (2015) but she’s married to Ross

It’s mostly white people who talk about echo chambers. Maybe you need the internet to meet people with different ideas but the rest of us do not. We know what the “other side” thinks because we deal with it every day! Everywhere! We’re fine. Carry on. Happy Saturday!

Pop culture/political takes that regularly got 100k+ likes

Me on Bluesky, so far

As more millennials become Real Housewives, we’ll see the shift from Lisas to Amandas and Laurens

I feel like Sally Bowles. This is my Kit Kat Club.

There will never be a “Joe Rogan for the left” because people on the left have the taste and attention span to engage with art.

In a just world, we’d have a third Barb & Star movie coming out with a fourth slated for production.

Conclave but for Sexiest Man Alive

Looking for my 19,000 followers from the old site here. This is probably what it was like after the Titanic sank.

This app feels real now that Bald Ann Dowd is here

Polio coming back means we are one step closer to FDR: The Sequel

Sounds crazy, no? But here in our village of Anatevka…

Being Indian with IBS is so embarrassing. I have to tell every server at Indian restaurants to make the food “white mild.” Not to mention when I order takeout, I just use the name “Hannah” so they don’t assume I can handle the extra green chilis.

Tr*mp and M*sk, one year from now

They have to call it “Sexiest Man Alive” because without the “alive,” Paul Newman would posthumously win every year.

The Vibemar Republic

(Barack *Hussein* Obama voice) Sarah JESSICA Parker

“you unfollow ppl over politics?” I have unfollowed people for preferring Andrew Lloyd Webber over Sondheim.