I deserve a fancy mustard

Poly nudist bisexual board game day is today and I just don’t feel into it. I’m still going, hoping to snap out of my funk, but really I just want to curl up under a blanket and cry.

PDX friends I don’t like the news I’m seeing today so everyone be safe

Is there a non-bro equivalent to “locking in”? I hate that phrase so much but I need to put more focus on my exercise and eating. Thoughts?

Getting really tired of going on 2-4 dates, being told we had the best sex on the last date, then getting ghosted. I don’t understand what’s going on. ☠️ I don’t put out at first to avoid this but apparently guys are willing to invest multiple dates to get laid once now? Over it.

I don’t think I love any of you as much as I love the idea of this game. Respectfully. 🥰

>throws away old vegetable >*sings* this pepper is sad and soft on the inside >*sings* like me

omg there was so much fart trapped under the covers 🤢

Playing DnD with an actual human that has no concept of human time is going to end me

You are what you eat I guess 😈 Also, they still exist!

There is an entire table of female nurses and one male nurse. I hope he thinks I’m cute 😍😍😍

Me: *misses turn* Me: I’ll turn here instead. Me: As a treat.

Okay randos in the break room, I’m not kink shaming but can we not use the phrase “double fisting” in the break room? I’m eating lunch

In other news, my penis did not break and still works as well as it can at 43 so far. Please clap and bring mac’n’cheese.

Omg finally an entire free night to be exhausted and depressed in the comfort of my own home

Multiple times today I’ve stopped myself to ask “why do people keep staring at me?!?!” I present to you exhibit A

I spent all day at work and now I’m waiting outside by myself for class to start. Worst rapture ever

Massage therapist today totally had a semi for part of today’s session. I do I know? I kept rubbing against it cuz we were so intertwined. I have such a crush on him 🥰 but alas…

“He wore a coat lined with Packa, Yknow, the bird”

Just took a double dose of Tylenol so I can absorb all the sweet sweet autism

Can someone explain to me why to old farts are afraid of autism? It’s all “don’t do this to prevent autism” but I’ve never heard them say why autism is bad??? Honestly I don’t know and am curious

Well, hello dinner

Stopped by the mediocre Hawaiian place but they were closed on Mondays. Fortunately, I saw thru the window are aren’t carrying the yuzu berry mt dew anymore so I don’t have to eat the mid food again

Tomorrow! Quick! What are all y’all wearing tot the rapture?

Anybody else having issues uploading video? Every time I get a compression error and I can’t upload

Not me with a craving for salad rolls and peanut sauce at 8:00am 🤤 mcm too I guess

Morning Bloomfies! I wanna be back in bed, but it is so crisp out right now I love it! Is it finally real autumn???

Ouch. Popped a blood vessel cuz my ring was too small. That’s all you get. Ouch.

2nd date: I had to take my retainers out during sex. But we still went out for sushi after so net positive.

I meant to be angry that I have 140% thighs and only 20% dumpy but ofc this is the first pic ever that contradicts that 🤬👀

When I was actively running my YouTube channel and thought it would make me famous, my first goal was to reach a point that someone would make silly fan art of me. Mission failed. 😔 youtu.be/LPOLV7i1Vvk?...

3 pounds of leftover sausage rigatoni in the fridge: exists Me: but I want new pasta 😔

Rearranged the living/dining rooms. What do you think?

Going to the neighborhood harvest festival and I think I’m giving Harvest Moon gay?

I love seeing all my friends naked, but yall better step up cuz I had to create a dedicated folder for this gorgeous specimen I’ve saved so many

I’m awake and depressed. And I couldn’t get the apartment arranged today so it’s a complete mess. The bathroom has drain flies. The floor dirt stained my feet even after vacuuming. The bedroom is full of displaced shit. No mentally soothing snacks. *sigh*

Date #2 is on Sunday and while I’m not obsessing over a guy like I normally do, I am excited enough about him that I can’t wait till Sunday

How am I supposed to incorporate fruits and veggies into my diet when by body violently expels them the first two weeks trying to eat them? 🧐

I forgot to tell yall my date went well last night! Had a beer and a meal and sat on the brewery patio for like 3.5 hours. Stole a few smooches and we’ve got another date on Sunday! 😊

No one: OMG Seriously no one: Me singing: 🎶… pooping and breathing are mutually exclusive”🎶

Do we have feelings on this? I’m not sure what’s happening.

Friends, I have a selection of choices for my new improv bf and I don’t know who to choose! 😭😭😭 1) Nerdy Straight- we play well together 2) Beautiful Bisexual- we play very well together 3) Cute Queer- didn’t play yet 4) Adorkable Pocket Gay- didn’t play yet Early to call but struggle is real

This cart pod bathroom has three individual potty rooms: 1) “All gender” with 3 gender symbols 2) “Restroom” with 2 gender symbols 3) “Women’s” with woman gender symbol I honestly hesitated where to go

I have/get to meet a whole new class of improv students tonight. 😰 Same instructor but new class. I’m nervous about meeting strangers!

Be the change you want to see

Looking for my historically accurate roommate 🧐

This could possibly be the best sandwich I’ve ever made. If you need me, we’ll be in the bedroom.

I did good and bought whole fruits and prepped them myself! In other news, I have to eat an entire honeydew this week…

Today’s outlook: I’m caught up on my projects and my only meetings are at 9a and 3p. ☠️ The purple thunder leaves some to be desired

I really wish depression made me sleepy. In other news, I just discovered Smoke Ring, a queer/trans barbershop quartet and they are 🔥🔥🔥