"Whatever Happened to Nasir Jones?"

The problem with bluesky is i already have so many bad actors blocked on the bird app that i still have a 70% pleasant experience using it. (I did see an advertisement for someone drinking piss, but i don't wanna think about that rn, i blocked 'em though!) I gotta block the bad actors here too, ugh.

If i get a flat tire omw to a function, that's a sign from the Lord I need to stay home. If i get a flat tire omw home, that just means I had fun :)

Swizz Beatz just ruined my mood because i forgot how his verse on Lord Lord Lord started.

@blackladyblue.bsky.social got me right!

Haven't written a song in ages, grinded 95% of one out today.

This post reminded me i forgot to put mine on

I am an enormous sentient office supply.

I don't think I look like someone who dates men with face tattoos. And yet. They keep trying me.

Belly button singing i might swerve, bend that corner, whoa.

You can only get shot and die once. How many times has Drake had to hear NLU?

Talked myself into the draws and then he talked me out of them. 🤷🏿‍♀️ at least my room's clean now.

A lot going on.

Meg ever point at me like she's Hand Banana, best believe I'm going. Skipping right to her actually!

The cat caught me doing the do and now i think he's traumatized. I'm sorry, my boy. I tried to protect you 🥲

The ancient prophecy foretold this.

That footage coming out before the RHOP reunion. Oh man.

I tore my room up looking for my lighter (my LAST lighter at that), gave up and started using matches like it's 1898, finally found my lighter...under my left breast. Ridiculous.

I have an MRI tomorrow and like 40 silver charms in my hair that I almost forgot to take out. I might cry. I might.

As 2024 comes to a close, please remember to vote for me as Nastiest Player Hater of the year at the Player Haters' Ball. For Your Consideration: the vindication of my disdain and utter contempt for one Aubrey Drake Graham.

I reported the roadside assistance guy @bigolegeek.bsky.social hopefully i own at&t by next week

Getting ready to go to the pajama jam: oh, these pants have pockets, i'ma wear these

Confidently told somebody where the southside ballroom is, then got in my car and googled it because I wasn't as sure as I sounded.

Idk why i denied myself the pleasure of bread at my beck and call. Usually I don't buy it, but I've been so broke I've been eating the (sliced) loaf that's been in my freezer. I love toast. I wanna be a toast.

Seen every variant of my name EXCEPT my name.

I counted every time my surprise guest said something crazy Sunday night. When he was about to leave Monday morning, he did THEE craziest thing yet and then, seeing me staring at him with my mouth agape (I've never been so shocked in my LIFE), he said "That's fourteen" and went to put on his coat.

Wtf was I ON in 2022

Sometimes I come upon things I have said in the past and astonish myself.

Me: *telling my ex about my night* Ex: did you suck his dick? Me: *laughs* absolutely not. Ex: yeah, you real strict about that.

The first person to say "i'ma put this already-baked bread back in the oven and see what happens" deserved the Nobel Peace Prize.

Fruit flies, are another matter entirely.

This poem is why I stopped killing spiders.

Virgo and Scorpio My mother is the most beautiful, resilient, intelligent, determined and funny person I have the pleasure of knowing. If I can be half as accomplished at her age, I'll consider myself well-off. It's a DAMN shame male Scorpios aren't fit to clean her shoes, because that's my type 😵‍💫

My mom says my dad told her, "wow, [my name] really WAS feeling bad last year" because they realized I've showed up to almost every family event this year (late sometimes, but i showed up ☝🏿). And I *was* feeling bad, so feeling like the same pain is ramping back up again has me sort of distressed.

Having carnal relations with an entirely unsuitable man just has a je ne sais quoi to it, on some forbidden fruit shit. A naughty treat.

Y'all said posting the bratz doll meme is corny, so just imagine i got my dreads in a messy updo

Can't believe Ashley went on a first date in coochie cutters

Quad and her man are CUTE

I wore a pair of panties i usually eschew, and my ass been eating GOOD all fucking day lol smh. The pants i have on make me look like i'm not wearing draws, i'm glad i had my jacket tied around me most of the day. I was appalled when i got home and saw how that thang was (inadvertently) poking out.

I dreamed that me and Drake (2019 Drake, if that makes it better [it doesn't]) were dating. I felt sorry for him in my dream. I kept hugging him because i felt like he needed a genuine embrace VERY badly. Is this spiritual warfare? Are snakes going to manifest physically in my house?

Tried 3 times to do a bun and it was ugly all three times. Gave up and left my hair down.

I gotta come back to the skating rink in the daytime with the chirren. I'm not finna fall and bust my ass in front of the bad bitches.

My sister is learning to roller skate. Soon as I get the appropriate safety gear and some skates, me too 😤

I do NOT support the way Dallas niggas be dancing all the FUCKING time, but i will make an exception if they on roller skates lmao.

I probably block niggas too fast. But maybe i don't block 'em fast ENUF.

I just got home. Am I going back outside? Maybe.

"Your car be getting away from me!"

I don't make death wishes. That's silly. Death is the only thing that is promisesd, why waste a wish on something that's coming no matter what? Now, I do have a few death *hopes*...and they are high 😌

Auntie: whew! Your car got some get-up-and-go to it!

The cat: *yelling to go outside* Me: i don't think you wanna go out there, playboy. TC: you don't know what i want, MOM. Me: oh. *opens door* TC: *races out, stops dead in his tracks* Outside: *raining* TC: *pawing at the door* mumsy dear, I've pressing matters to attend to inside. Allow me back in.